Devoted To Sex |h.s|

[11] My Body Says Yes

' I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice when I'm not around
You're so fucking special
I wish I was special '

-Radio Head 'Creep

* Zoe *

All these emotions that I had no idea that I was holding in just burst from the inside of me. I start to bawl my eyes out into his chest and he wraps his arms around me slowly, rubbing my back. I couldn't help myself but to keep crying. My mum is dead, Harry recognized me, my life had been a fucking train wreck. What the fuck was going to happen to me next? I may as well just drop dead like my step father wishes I would do. It was all to overwhelming for me to take in especially about my mum.

Everything just came out all at once all the tears I was holding back for months. It all just spilled out of me and it felt really good. The hot tears that streamed down my face going through Harry's white shirt, staining it with my eyeliner and eye shadow.

"It's alright Zoey. I'm here for you. Cry. Let it all out. I know it hurts." I hear Harry say to me in a very comforting tone. I nod and son loudly into his chest not being able to control myself. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop myself from crying.

"I-I'm a mess Harry..." I cry to him, grabbing onto the back of his turquoise shirt. "I can't eat." I whispered, gesturing to my bony, skinny figure. I was loosing a lot of weight though you'd think that the weed would help me to eat but no it didn't. "I don't sleep much. I'm a fucking drug addict." I murmur looking up at Harry, seeing his eyes widen. I give him a few minutes to respond to what I had said about the drugs. I could tell that he wasn't too happy about that so I just do what feels right at the moment. I grab ahold of his shirt, pulling him closer to me and I kiss him. I feel his arms grab a hold of my waist only to stay there for a few seconds before pushing me away slightly.

"Zoey wha-" He begins and I shake my head, pressing my finger against his lips. Harry don't ruin the moment.

"Just make it all go away. Please Harry." I whispered, looking up into his eyes, smiling a little when he slowly leans down, pressing his lips against mine again. It felt so right...having his lips against mine. I slowly clamped my eyes shut, his hands slowly drifting down my sides to my waistline. I could feel his mouth part slowly, mine moving in sync with his as he slips his tongue into my mouth, deepening the kiss.

Now I'm not really a tongue kissing kind of girl but Harry was enjoying himself and that's all that mattered. I hear a low sexy throat groan emit from Harry's mouth and I could feel my panties starting to get soaking wet. Harry Styles moan is the most perfect thing that could ever come from someone's lips. It sounded so perfect, so beautiful. Just like him.

As I was thinking I was totally lost in thought until I feel Harry's soft pink lips attach to my lightly tanned skin, causing me to moan very softly. Harry smirks and looks up at me, sucking harder and harder at my skin. Fuck, I absolutely cannot believe that this is actually happening. I've know Harry for so long before the fame, all the cameras all up in his face, before all of these fans came into the picture. This was probably very very wrong to hook up with him only because he's my best friend. I don't want this to put a dent in what we had already.

I slowly remove my hands from around his neck and bring them down to his pants, feeling for the start of his belt. I tug him by his belt over to the bed once the kiss is broken and I sit in the edge of the king sized bed with nice silky sheets.

"Wait. Wait." Harry says breathless from the heated kiss that we shared only seconds ago. "This seems so wrong. I don't want to ruin our friendship. It's the best thing we have together." He whispered and i frown lightly looking up at him my eyes wide and full of disappointment but I nod slowly, letting his belt slip from my hands.