Chapter 7: First Kisses

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I tried my hardest to not feel awkward as we drove back to Charlie's apartment. It really helped that he was blasting high school musical and was singing it at the top of his lungs. I joined in, willing myself to not think about what would come and instead live in the moment.

Once we parked, Charlie kept the conversation going as we made it up to his apartment. He must have sensed my unease because the constant talking made me more comfortable and gave me less time to overthink.

He set his keys down on the counter and then ran and jumped on the couch with a loud exasperated sigh.

"You weirdo." I laughed as he stretched out over the couch.

He then got into a normal sitting position and pat the space next to him. I went over and sat beside him as he grabbed the remote and began scrolling through Netflix.

"How about we watch... Teen Titans?" Charlie offered and my face lit up.

I nodded eagerly, as it was my favorite show growing up. No matter how many times I watched it, the show never got old. Robin was my first crush after all.

Charlie found Teen Titans and started playing it from the beginning, stretching out his arm to rest behind me. Since I was so accustomed to Charlie's affectionate nature I easily settled into my spot on the couch, gently leaning my head on his shoulder.

We watched a couple of episodes, making fun of some of the cheesy lines and talking about our favorite characters. I prayed that he couldn't hear my erratic heartbeat, my anticipation growing as the night went on.

After all the activities I had partaken in that day, I would have expected myself to be exhausted.
Instead I was wired, hyperaware of my every movement and trying to predict when it would happen.

I think Charlie could tell that I was zoning out and nervous because he paused the show.

"Are you okay, Mads?" He asked softly and I bit my lip and nodded.

"Yeah I'm fine, just getting tired that's all." I lied, hoping it was convincing enough to derail him from my nerves.

"Madison... I have a serious question for you." He said, turning to face me.

I followed suit, mirroring him as I met his determined gaze.

"Are you sure that you want me to be your first kiss?" He asked honestly and I thought about it for a moment.

I searched my mind for any ounce of doubt about the situation and came up empty.

"Yes, I'm sure." I answered sincerely.

He nodded and fell silent, and I could tell he was thinking something over in his head.

"You can do it now if you want." I offered, unsure where this confidence was coming from.

Somehow it felt easier demanding a kiss then waiting for one.

Charlie's eyes flickered to my own, and then he reached for me, his hand coming to rest gently on my cheek.

He began to close in on me, leaning in as his eyes drifted down to my lips. I expected myself to be aquatinted with him being in close proximity at this point. However, he was only ever this close to my face when we were acting and he was Luke and I was Julie. But this wasn't Luke, this was Charlie and he wasn't acting.

It suddenly all seemed too weird and I shied away, turning my head as a giggle erupted from my throat.

Charlie laughed.

"What are you doing?" He asked, amusement in his voice.

As my giggle fit calmed and I regained control over my breathing, I shook my head.

"Sorry, sorry. That was just weird. Okay, I'm ready." I asserted and his hand returned to its former position as he began to lean in.

I leaned up slightly to meet him, but just as he was inches from my mouth, I erupted into another giggle fit.

This one was stronger than the last and had me doubled over, practically in his lap as I laughed my head off.

"Maaadison." He whined and I regained my composure, wiping a few stray tears from my eyes.

Once I was able to get a good look at him I could see that he was pouting slightly.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Okay, now I'm ready for real." I declared and he wasted no time, taking both sides of my face in his hands.

"Be serious, you dork!" He said shaking his head, humor in his eyes.

With both of his hands secure on my face, I didn't really have anywhere to go this time. There was no escaping the inevitable now.

"Okay, I'm serious." I said, giving him my best serious face.

Charlie's eyes met my own with an intensity I've only ever seen when he was writing music or learning a new song.

"Do you trust me?" He asked, his voice quieter than it had been before.

"I trust you." I whispered back.

That's when his eyes fell to my lips again and he leaned forward. His strong hands on the sides of my face gently drew me to up him. I could hear my heartbeat in my ears as my eyes fluttered shut and his lips pressed against mine.

My skin tingled at the new sensation of another person's lips on my own. It was very gentle, intimate, and sweet. His lips moved slowly against mine, and I was surprised when I mirrored his actions, my body seeming to know what to do. He held the kiss for a lingering moment before he carefully pulled back, and surveyed my response.

My entire face flushed, and I brought my hands up to my face in an attempt to hide it.

"You okay?" Charlie mused, his concern over my reaction turning into an ego boost.

"That was weird." I spoke quickly, shaking my head as if that would drain the color from my face.

He snorted.

"Weird good or weird bad?" He questioned, clearly enjoying my flustered state and I wanted to sass him back into humility.

I took a deep breath, my eyes finally lifting to meeting his.

"Weird good." I finally replied, and I couldn't bare to stare at that smug smile for a moment longer.

"Ugh, don't look at me!" I covered my face with my hands then buried my face into his chest.

Charlie laughed, the sound echoing against my cheek as he wrapped his arms around me.

"I'm glad I didn't mess it up. I take it you had a good first kiss then?" He asked and I wanted to smack him because he already knew the answer.

I nodded into his chest and he laughed again as he gently rubbed my back.

"Good, I'm glad." He sighed in what I assumed to be relief.

"Thank you for today..." I said quietly, not ready to face him yet so I kept my face squished against his shirt.

"You're welcome, Mads. I'd do anything for you, you know that." He said, quoting Luke from the first season of Julie and the Phantoms.

I smiled into his chest, suddenly feeling heavy from all of the exertion of the day. Charlie and I had adjusted so that he was laying with his back on the couch, and I was laying on top of him with my head on his chest.

"I know..." I slurred, feeling so comfortable and safe in my friend's arms.

The weight was lifted, all the anxiety and worry that I had accumulated over the past couple of months over my first kiss had all dissolved. It wasn't as scary as I thought it would be, it was actually sweet and sort of perfect.

As I laid there surrounded by Charlie's warmth and support, I cherished this moment I was able to share with him as I easily fell asleep.

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