First Love, Last [Slow Update]

25

"How are you? Are you okay?" I asked Spencer through the phone.

"Ang lambing ng boses mo ah." Umirap ako.

"Of course you need comfort!" I yelled on my phone. "Ewan ko sa'yo!" I ended the call.

Ilang linggo na kaming 'di nagkikita ni Spencer. His Uncle and Aunt died in an airplane hijack. Everyone was sad when I called Spencer one time, naririnig ko pa ang hagulhol ng mga relatives niya.

I know Zion's sad but he never cried-- at least in front of me. Araw-araw rin siya'ng nagf-face time, nasa Cebu kasi sila ngayon.

Pauwi na sila ngayon kasama ang kaniyang nag-iisa'ng pinsan nila. 

Morning after they got home, Zion already informed me that we'll find apartment today. 

"Hoy! Maghunos-dili ka muna!" I yelled again. "Pagpahingahin mo muna 'yang pinsan mo!" Nasabi niya rin kasi sa'kin na gusto rin ng kaniya'ng pinsan na mag-apartment sa kolehiyo, kaya inalok niya kami dalawa'ng magsama sa iisa'ng apartment.

"Siya 'yong may gusto..." He said calmly, much like him, sinisigawan na siya kalmado pa'rin para'ng natatawa pa. 

Bumuga ako ng marahas na hangin. "Okay. What time ba kayo dadating?" I asked.

"On the way na." 

And because I already took a shower I just need to change into more decent clothes and put light make-up on. I wore a long sleeve crop top and jeans at Vans. 

I pushed the button of our lift to go down. Bumungad sa'kin si ate na nagb-bake.

Ang relasyon namin ng pamilya ko ay... gano'n pa'rin. Awkward, minsan nga ay nagpapanggap na lamang ako'ng tulog o may ginagawa para hindi na maging awkward ang hapag. 

I tried throwing some topics in the air but it was just really awkward, and what's funny is that they we're laughing and joking around comfortably when I left the table. 

I just shrugged off the thought and when out of the lift. 

"Masarap..." Pagpaparinig ni ate habang tinitikman ang kaniya'ng ini-bake habang tumitingin sa'kin.

Gosh ate you can say. "Tikman mo 'to" or what.

Lumapit ako sa lamesa at kumuha ng pagkain roon. "Hmm... Masarap nga."

Nakita ko ang pagkislap ng mga mata ni ate. 

"Ma'am nandito po si sir Spencer." Anunsyo ng kasambahay.  I peeked outside before looking back at my sister. Ngayon naman ay mukha siya'ng nab-bwiset sa pagdating ni Spencer. Nang nagtama ang paningin namin ay bigla siya'ng tumalikod at kumuha ng baonan.

"Hello everyone!" Pasigaw na bati ni Spencer galing sa salas.

Nakaismid si ate habang inaabot sa'kin ang kaniya'ng hinahanda'ng baon sa'kin. "Hi ate Eustace!" Bati ni Spence sa kaniya bago umakbay sa'kin. Naramdaman ko ang bahagya'ng pag talon ni Spence ng nakita niya'ng inirapan siya ni ate.

"Sa'n na naman kayo?" Tanong ni ate na halata'ng iritado. Nagkatinginan kami ni Spence.

"Diyan lang ate." He smiled before pulling me with him. "Mauna na kami!" Kumaway siya.

Pakadating namin sa labas ng bahay ay agad niya ako'ng niyakap ng sobra'ng higpit narinig ko ang pagputok ng aking mga buto. 

"I missed you." Bulong niya. Ngumiwi ako.

Wow sino na ba ako sa buhay niya at gan'to niya na agad ako kamiss.

"Hi!" Bati ng babae sa kotse ni Spence.

"Oh my god!" I yelled in surprise. "Desiree?!" 

"Yes!" She chuckled. She's my favorite vlogger!

"Magpinsan kayo?" Sinenyas ko si Spence.

"Yea," Humalkhak siya.

"Siya makakasama mo sa apartment." Napatunganga ako. The one and only Desiree will be my mate!

Bago ako pumasok sa kotse ay binulongan ako ni Spence. "Don't talk about her parents."

We started with apartments near our house but Spencer doesn't like those apartments. I don't know why he has a say on this though but since Desiree will be with me hinayaan ko na.

It took us hours we also ate ate Eustace's foods and got hungry again before finally finding an apartment that Spencer approved.

This one's near the NDDU, doon rin daw mag-aaral si Desiree.

Spence paid for the down before we left to eat. 

Sa Jeong Ga-Ne na rin kami kumain, a well-known Korean Restaurant in General Santos.

"Apartment down! Enroll to go!" Desiree announced before entering the car.

Inistart ni Spencer ang makina ng kaniya'ng sasakyan at nang makit niya'ng nakahanda na kami ay saka siya umandar.

Before going home ofcourse we have to pass by the OLPGV and Blugre Coffee  and our school Holy Trinity.

Memories flashed and feelings overflowed. The memories of Xavion make my heart sink. Ilang beses ko nang pilit iniiwasan ang mga lugar na sinisigaw si Xavion.

Alam ko'ng napansin rin ng magpinsan ang pag-iba ng aking ugali, ngunit 'di na sila nagsalita. Pagkarating ko sa bahay ay hinatid pa ako ni Spencer.

"Are you okay?" He asked. Tumango lang ako bago siya tinalikuran para makasakay sa lift.

Pagkapasok ko sa aking kuwarto ay agad ko'ng isinubsob ang aking mukha sa aking kama.

I checked my phone-- he's number. The last text I sent was 5 months or so ago. He hasn't seen it either.

It's been almost 2 yeas na pala. We didn't even break up or anything, no closure, he just disappeared.

The whole afternoon was just me crying. I don't want to be mad at him but I can't help. He left me when I needed him and made me a fool of him.

2 years na pero hanggang ngayon pala umaasa pa'rin pala ako sa kaniya. 

I wiped my tears when I heard a knock on my door.

"Hey? Descey? Are you okay?" Malambing na tawag ni ate na sumisilip. Mas lumaki pa ang tiyan niya. She started walking towards me. Nang makalapit siya ay agad niya'ng pinunasan niya rin ang wala'ng tigil kong luha.

She pulled me near her and started rubbing my hair.

"Naaalala mo siya?" I did not answer but my sobs answered her question. "Kalma okay? Inhale... exhale..." Paulit-ulit niya'ng bulong sa akin.

My shaking voice filled the room.

"Alam mo ba kung bakit kita pinilit noong graduation mo?" I did not answer again. "Nakita ko siya sa kanila'ng bahay Descey..." She stopped her words again when she heard my sobs. "All I'll say now is that he's not good for you." She kissed my forehead.

After a long crying session my sister tucked me to bed. The last thing I remember is that she was hugging me while rubbing my hair. It didn't take long for me to sleep because I was drained.

Pagkagising ko sa umaga ay halos hindi ko pa mabuksan ang aking mga mata sa maga. I took a cold shower to make my eyes better. My sister thankfully told the maids to just send me my breakfast so I don't have to go down.

Bukas pa magsisimula ang enrollment ng Notre Dame.

Nahihiya ako kina Spencer at Desiree dahil sa biglaang pag-emote ko kahapon.

But I was also thankful that Spencer chose that road. Finally I was able to let my feelings out and finally tell myself that... Xavion's not food for me.