Paradise (Book One)

Bluebird

How the hell does a broken heart get back together when it’s torn apart?
Teach itself to start beating again?

This little bluebird came looking for you
I said that I hadn’t seen you in quite some time
And this little bluebird came looking again
I said we weren’t even friends, she could have you

Don’t you think it was hard?
I didn’t even say that you died
But it wouldn’t have been such a lie, ‘cause then I started to cry

This little bluebird sure won't give it a rest
She swears that you may be better than all the rest
I said, “No, you’ve got it all wrong.
If he was something special, I wouldn’t have this song.”

And don’t you think it was hard?
I didn’t even say that you died
But it wouldn’t have been such a lie, ‘cause then I started to cry

How the hell does a broken heart get back together when it’s torn apart?
And teach itself to start beating again?

What if when she comes over, I am in your arms, taking all I want from you again?

How the hell does a broken heart get back together when it’s torn apart?
Teach itself to start beating again?
How the hell does a broken heart get back together when it’s torn apart?
Teach itself to start beating again?
Beating again

This little bluebird won’t come here anymore
So I went looking for her, and I found you

"Yes, daddy...No, nothing. I'll arrange the meeting with the board on Monday next week...Yes. I'll do that... Looking forward to it... Yes., alright. Do you want me to pick you up from the airport?...Okay, I see you when you get home...Bye, ingat po kayo diyan...Love you."

Beep.

Nawala na kausap niya sa kabilang linya.

"He's coming home?" tanong ni Maja.

"Yeah. He'll arrive this coming Saturday. He said Monday, he wants to meet the board at 9 am, so make a schedule and he specifically said, walang excuse. Everybody has to be there. So better start calling their secretaries to schedule the meeting."

"Yes ma'am." At tumalima na ito.

Bakit uuwi na agad ang daddy niya? It's only been almost 3 months. May kapalpakan ba siyang nagawa or mali ang naging desisyon niya kaya naisipan agad nitong umuwi?
Pero mukha namang hindi ito galit. Para pa ngang pagod na pagod ang boses nito pero there's a trace of happiness.

At may sorpresa daw sa kanya? What could it be? Will it be a good suprise or a bad one?
Good or bad, it will still be a suprise from her father. It's a first time of sort for his father to do so.

She's excited and nervous at the same time. Balak na rin niyang tuluyang kausapin ang ama at klaruhin ang dapat klaruhin. She's really tired of what she's doing at kung mas aaminin pa niya sa sarili, she wanna love again.

To the same person.

"He said he loves me. Was it out of drunkenness or his heart finally speaking?"

"That's his heart speaking, my friend."

"Nah, he was just drowning with liquor when he said that. Of course, he did not mean it!"

"Ash, believe me, he does. It's the first time he said it, right? He was so desperate to say it you."

"Duh! When do words said by drunken people be considered as truthful? You're the one who's desperate, Gabbie, so back off!"

"And why would I, Tanya? No, I won't back off and I won't leave Asher alone until she realized Gerald really loves her."

"Eh hindi nga eh! Niloloko lang siya."

"Please, you two, get off my head!'

Pumasok si Maja sa opisina niya. "Hey, may kaaway ka?"

"Ha? Wala. Ahm, natapos mo na ba i-confirm board meeting next week?"

"Yap. They'll email me their confirmation of their attendance."

"Okay."

"Ahm, Ash, hindi mo ba talaga babasahin ang mga ito?" sabay abot sa kanya ng plastic folder.

Hindi kinuha ni Asher ang iniaabot ni Maja. Alam niya kung ano ang mga yon.

"No, why would I?"

"They came from him?"

"More the reason I should not read them. Ikaw, binasa mo ba?"

"Hindi."

"Bakit? Dati-rati naman binabasa mo ang nakasulat sa mga yan."

"This time, no, because I'm sure the words written there were pure of emotions and to be read only by you. Saka ko na lang ako makikibasa kapag nabasa mo na."

"That won't happen."

"Are you sure?"

"Hundred percent."

"Really?"

"Maj, nagiging makulit ka na ring tulad ng boyfriend mo," sita niya sa sekretarya.

"Of course, in love kami sa isa't isa eh, though hindi kami magkasundo sa maraming bagay. Isa na dyan ang tungkol sa inyo ni Gerald."

"Wala naman kayong dapat pag-awayan, Maj. It's over.'

Tapos na nga ba?

Eh ano yung narinig niyang sinabi ng lalake?

Dapat ba niyang sabihin sa kaibigan ang nangyari nung isang gabi?

"Mukhang may sasabihin ka. Ano yun?" tanong sa kanya ni Maja, parang nahulaan ang iniisip niya.

"Ahm, I saw him the other night. "

"Really? Saan?"

"Sa Station 15."

"Station 15? Doon din..."

"Doon din ano?"

"Wala." Muntik nang masabi ni Maja na doon din natuklasan ni Hans ang ginawa ni Gerald.

"And he was with Cristine."

"And who is she?"

"Miguel's childhod sweetheart."

"Really?"

"Really."

"And why she's with Gerald?"

"Why else?"

"She's his new girl?"

"Seems like. Seen them twice together."

"Hmn, this is interesting. You were once Gerald's who is now Cristine's who was once Miguel's who is now yours. Galing makipaglaro talaga ng tadhana."

"Ginawa mo naman kaming bagay, pag-aari ang isa't isa."

"Yun na rin yun. Anyhow, what happened when you saw him? Did you talk? Did he explain?"

"He was drunk, dead drunk. I saw him slumped on his seat. I thought something happened to him so I rushed to his side. I, why are you grinning?" nagtatakang tanong niya kay Maja.

"You said you rushed to his side, right?"

"Yeah?"

"Okay, then, please continue with the kuwento," nakangisi pa rin nitong sabi.

"I won't, until you tell me why your face is like that."

"Eh kasi naman, you "rushed" to his side when you saw him in that situation. Are you sure wala ka nang nararamdaman dun sa tao?"

"What's wrong with what I did? Nag-worry ako nung makita ko siyang ganun. His stubbles were so obvious, hair was untidy, humpak ang pisngi and nagingitim ang gilid ng mata nya. I thought he was sick. Yun pala, nakatulog lang sa sobrang kalasingan."

"So in a short span of time, you were able to memorize what he looked like? Wala na palang nararamdaman ha?" Nakangisi itong halos kita na buong ngipin.

Nagtataka na talaga si Asher sa inaasal ni Maja. "Why are you grinning from ear to ear? Para kang si Joker!"

"Ash, you told me before wala ka nang nararamdaman dun sa tao, yet you're acting otherwise. Boss, your body is not coordinating properly with your mind. Pagsabihan mo yang utak mo ha. Sabihin mo, sa susunod, kung magsasalita siya thru your mouth, yun eh kung ano talaga ang nasa puso. Tell your brain, stop lying."

"I don't understand any word you said, Maj."

"Ganun talaga pag hindi synchronized ang utak sa puso at katawan. Walang naiintindihan."

"Wala talaga akong maintindihan sa sinasabi mo."

"Mismo. O tapos, who took him home?"

"Siyempre pa, si Cristine. I left him with her and Miguel."

"Bakit hindi ikaw?"

"Bakit magiging ako?"

"Eh di ba kayo naman talagang dalawa?"

"Eh di ba nga ikaw na rin ang may sabi, he's Cristine's?"

"Ewan ko sa 'yo, Asher. Hanggang kailan mo ba titikisin si Gerald? Hanggang kailan mo ba itatanggi sa sarili mo ang totoo?"

"Totoong ano?"

"Totoong mahal mo siya. Na kahit anong pagtanggi niyang utak mo sa kanya, tibok pa rin ng puso mo ang nangingibabaw."

"Hindi ko naman na itatanggi na mahal ko siya. Pero hindi pwede."

"Then anong saysay ng pagmamahal na yan kung hindi mo gagawan ng paraan?"
Nagkibit balikat lang siya.

"At least yung isa is making his move kahit papaano. Look at the flowers, these cards. At least pay attention to them."

Binibigyan naman niya ng atensyon ang mga bulaklak. Sa bahay niya ipinapadala ni Maja ang mga flowers para daw sa umaga pa lang bago siya pumasok sa opisina eh nakikita na niya. Hindi nito sinunod ang gusto niyang huwag makita ang mga bulaklak. Hindi naman niya magawang itapon ang mga ito dahil sa bukod na magaganda at paborito niya ang klase, deep inside she missed the sender of those flowers. Kahit sa mga bulaklak man lang may koneksyon sila ng binata.

Pero hanggang dun lang. Hanggang dun lang ang pwede niyang gawing hakbang.

"He said he loves me."

"Kailan?"

"That night when I saw him. But he was drunk so I'm sure he did not mean it."

"Malay mo naman, yun lang ang moment na nagkalakas siya ng loob."

"And Cristine heard it."

"Good, then."

"Ano ka ba,? Isn't it insulting? Siya ang kasama, pero sa iba niya sinabi ang mga salitang yon?"

"At least ma-realize nang babaeng yon na hindi talaga kanya si Gerald. I'll leave these cards here on your table. Maybe, if you try to read them, marami ka pang "I Love You's" na mababasa," sabay kindat sa kanya at lumabas na ng opisina.

Should she read them. What if they are all just lies just to lure her to him again? Just like the words written in those cards he sent before?

Asher was still contemplating whether to read the messages on the cards or not, when Maja buzzed on her intercon.

"Ash, there's a woman here looking for you."

"Sino?"

"The Blue Bird, Cristine. The woman we're talking about earlier," bulong nito sa telepono.

Cristine?

What is the woman doing here in her office? What does she want?

As far as she's concerned, wala silang dapat pag-usapan ng babae, business or personal so why is she here? But the other part of her wanted to know more about the woman Miguel said was his childhood sweetheart. She wanted to know more about the one who, as Maja said, now "owns" Gerald.

After a minute of dilly-dallying, "Okay, let her in."

"Sure ka? Do you need a back up?"

"For what?" takang tanong niya.

"Wala. Okay, I'll let her in."

She cut the line and waited for her visitor to come in.

Cristine entered her office, looking elegant in her peach-colored Valentino day-dress emphasizing her already flawless skin and combined with 3-inch Jimmy Choo pumps and clutch.

Asher admitted the woman is a beauty. No wonder Miguel was still enamored with her. And so is Gerald.  

"Hi. Sorry if I came without a buzz." She offered her hand and Asher hesitantly accepted her handshake.

"It's okay, upo ka," motioning her to sit down. "Do you want something to drink?" Asher is trying to be accommodating kahit nagtataka pa rin siya sa pagpunta ng babae dito sa opisina niya.

"Thank you. And no, I'm fine, thanks. I'm not gonna stay long."

"How may I help you then?" she became formal.

Cristine looked like she was taking her balance. And then,

"I'll go straight to the point. Do you still love Gerald?"

Nagulat si Asher sa kaprangkahan ng babae.

"What's it with you?" she asked.

"Miguel."

"I'm sorry but I don't understand."

"If you still love Gerald, will you leave Miguel alone? He don't deserve to be a second choice, you know."

Nagpanting ang tenga niya. The woman is waging war at her! Who is she para pakialaman ang buhay nya?

"If you still love Miguel, why are you with Gerald?" ganting tanong niya. She is so ready to fight with this woman.

Cristine was caught off guard with her question. Pero madali itong nakabawi. "My relationship with Gerald is something else. But do you still love him? I mean, Gerald?"

"Why do you need to know? You want me to back off? You don't have to come here just to warn me off him. It's obvious to all of us that that's what I'd done."

"At the expense of Miguel?"

"Look, I see no sense of this talk, Ms. Cristine. I couldn't even comprehend your reason why you came here. If it's only for Gerald, you're wasting your time. I don't care about him. We're not even together anymore. Anyhow, I don't owe you any explanation about my past relationship with him. As for Miguel, well, my relationship with him is also something else," panggagaya niya dito. "If you don't mind, I still have lots of things to do," at ibinaling na  niya sa papeles ang atensyon niya.

Wala silang naging imikan pagkatapos.

After a while, tumayo na ang babae. "Okay, then. Since you already confirmed you don't have any feelings with Gerald, its useless for me to say he is dying sick at the hospital. Poor guy, the only reason he's dying doesn't even give a damn about him. Nice to meet you Ms. Asher. And good day!" pagpapaalam nito. Pero bago ito, tuluyung umalis, "And one last thing. Stop playing with Miguel's feelings." At tuluyan na itong umalis.

She was left dumbfounded.