Once Upon A Bet

/19/ Still hate you

Dedicated to Valeryaa__, for all the amazing support and love <333

/Two Years Ago/

I still wasn't sure if coming here was the best option.

I haven't properly talked to Jake since, well, since that. He tried to call me several times, but what was I supposed to say after that? I was ashamed, and hurt... and suddenly all the advises I been receiving about staying away from them didn't sound so baseless.

He didn't love me. Not really, did he? Or he would have said so... said something. He wouldn't get mad aver such a disastrous attempt to love making... He would have reassured me and made me feel safe and loved and not like I needed to proof my love to him by sleeping with him.

Right?

Or maybe it was all on me. Maybe it was my inexperience, maybe I wasn't able to make this works and I should just-

No. I stop my train of thoughts, nothing of that was my fault. I tried, I failed, I wasn't ready.

And he didn't love me.

That's why his note took me completely by surprise. Sure, he'd tried to talk to me and called me, but there was no way I was able to face him after such a humiliation. I mean, I just exposed myself to him, lay all my cards out and that still wasn't enough. To say I was ashamed and hurt was an understatement.

Coming to Tyler's party wasn't my first option, nor coming back here where everything had taken place. But half the school had been invited to his birthday party so at least I wouldn't be as lonely as the last time I was here. At least I get to drag Dalia with me, much to her distaste. She still very reluctant to everything related to the Trio, but since this was a Woodbert, she didn't resist as much as I knew she would have otherwise.

Were Jake and I good? I doubted that. In fact, I was almost seventy percent sure we've kinda broken up after such a disaster, but the part of me that still clingy and needy clung to him one last time when I got the cute note, asking for forgiveness and begging me to come.

Maybe, just maybe, we could work this out. Maybe we needed to hit rock bottom in order to rise.

But that was a big, fat MAYBE and that was why Dalia was here, as moral support if things turned out wrong like the last time. Even if she wasn't doing a good job so far.

"Last chance, Nova. You sure you don't want to get out of this?"

Yes. "No." I linked our arms, swallowing the knot in my throat, but it felt too big to just disappear out of my will. "Let's go."

The place was filled, most of our school mates were here, some of whose I recognized others I only seen a couple times. Funny how all that judging against the Trio wasn't that cryptic when they were holding such a party.

The lights were dim, and music blared the place, making me feel the beat in my bones. There was a huge pile of wrapped gifts over the table in the corner, besides a giant TV with pics of Tyler through the years and his friends, but no one was really paying attention to. I looked more like a disco than like a friendly party.

So not my element.

But I already knew this. I wasn't here to enjoy myself, I was here to solve a problem... solve? I wish. As much as last week hurt me if Jake was ready to move pass that awful scene I was more than eager to get back to what we had, to erase everything that's happened since summer ended. I wanted my Jake back.