La Pantera

Ch. 25 Identity Crisis

Song for Chapter: Yellow by Coldplay

Stevie sat on the rooftop of the hotel the cast was staying at, smoking away as she watched the sun go down. She heard footsteps before seeing Kevin walk over. "What do you want?", she asked warningly. "Calm your horses , I'm just havin' a smoke too.", Kevin sat next to her. They blew smoke rings out together as the sunset cast rosy gold hues upon them. "You ever have crazy dreams Kevin?", she asked him. "Sure...sometimes. What are yours?", he asked looking at her. "I'll have a reoccurring dream some nights....where I'm with a family that isn't my birth family. I'm a small kid. We're playing together and having fun. The father is tall with black , wild hair. His eyes look like mine. He's got olive skin, and tattoos like me. The mom has my hair color and she's a bit shorter than me. There's 2 sisters that are older than me. They're beckoning me to join them outside , and we just run around. Then at some point, our father yells at us to come inside and he'll pick me up and just ......I don't know , hold me in his arms and tell me he loves me. And as soon as we're about to eat dinner, I wake up.", she tells Kevin.

"Damn, that's a weird dream. You adopted or something?", Kevin asked Stevie. "No. That's the weird part....sometimes I wish I was. My family was filled with assholes.", she snarled. "Gotcha....my family was okay. Nothing too crazy.", he stared ahead watching the stars come out. "They treat you different, cuz of how you are?", he asked. "We'll put it that way yeah.", Stevie clenched her jaws, holding back tears. "Hey I'm sorry...I didn't mean to make ya sad.", Kevin offered an arm for her to come into. "I'm good.", she smiled sadly. "It sometimes feels like it's not a dream....cuz I don't remember seeing baby pictures of myself ever.". She said. "I feel crazy saying it but that's the thing. You think it can be real?", she asked him. "I think it might be....no baby pictures might mean something shady is going on. The question is, do you care enough to go back , or do you wanna be your own person out here?", Kevin looked Stevie in the eyes. Stevie thought over his question, sighing to herself. "I'll be my own person first....I didn't come this far for nothing.", she declared. Kevin smiled to himself ; even if she was crazy in his eyes, Stevie sure was something special to a bunch of other people. He knew she'd be just fine. "We gotta get sleep. Let's go before they catch us.", he laughed. Stevie snickered too before running with him inside.

Later that night, Stevie played with her silver locket while laying in bed. She opened the clasp to reveal a picture of her and Martin inside. She stared at it longingly, wishing she could have him by her side. "You'd be so happy out in California.", she whispered to the picture. She sniffled and held it to her chest. "I miss you so much.", her whispers were the only thing heard in that room. She couldn't help but think over what Kevin had said. What if there was a secret her family was hiding from her? She was torn on what to do. She certainly didn't want to go back home and face her father again, not wanting to face his wrath. She ran a hand through her hair, growling in frustration. She looked in the mirror above the dresser and caught a glimpse of Martin's face behind her.

"AGHH!", she screamed and turned around, seeing nothing there. "Wha-.....what the fuck?", she whispered. "Y-you're supposed to be dead! Why do you keep coming back?!", she yelled. "Either come back to life or just quit teasing me!", she growled. Her breathing picked up as she backed up into the bed, sitting on it. She began to cry, burying her face into her hands. "I hate you!", she hoarsely whispered. "I hate and love you so much!" She continued to cry, seeing there was nothing else she could do. She then looked down at the locket, her hand shaking as she gripped it tight. She yanked it off her neck before going on the balcony and throwing it as hard as she could into the night. She panted as she processed what she'd just done. She wiped her sniffling nose with her arm before heading inside to go to sleep.