What Really Matters (Lumity AU)

5. Amity

My siblings were the worst. I was trying to tell Luz that she couldn't control me with her cuteness, but then Emira had to go and invite her to their table, and Edric was probably telling her how gay I was right this second!

Only because he thought I was gay. Not because I was gay or anything. Why would I be gay? Nope, not me.

"Are you even listening to me?" Boscha asked, and I jumped.

"What?"

She rolled her eyes. "Nothing, apparently. Just that my parents are buying me that new phone that just came out."

I tried to be excited for her. Really, I did. I had tried to be excited for her every single time she told me something like this, what cool gadgets her parents were buying her and such, but it was hard when the best my parents got me were looks that weren't as disappointed as usual. Fake it till you make it was how the saying went. But I had faked excitement for years and I hadn't yet made it.

"That's amazing," I told her anyway. "How much was it?"

Boscha thrived on attention. That simple question was enough to get her talking for at least a few minutes. "Only a couple hundred dollars." She probably would have flipped her pink hair if it hadn't been up in a ponytail. I zoned out as she told everyone at the table the details of how many games she could put on at one time, how it would fit perfectly in her pocket, how it was better than anyone else's. Instead, my thoughts turned to Luz.

Luz was her name. And it was a gorgeous name. Just like her gorgeous pixie cut hair, her gorgeous warm brown eyes, her bright personality. She had watched Boscha make fun of Willow, and she had still given us a second chance.

The way you acted today isn't going to make her want to give you a third one, a voice inside my head whispered, but I shut that down quickly. That kind of thinking wasn't good. The important thing was that I had felt confident enough on my Pre CECA.

"Thirty-three percent," I whispered to myself after school, staring at the green paper. "I can't believe I only got thirty-three percent on the test."

"Do you need a ride home or something?" Ms. Clawthorne asked, probably with good reason. I was the last student still in the room, and I hadn't moved much since I got the test back. I shook my head. "Don't beat yourself up about that test, kid," she told me. "You did a better job than most, actually. It was a hard test. And you haven't learned the material yet, remember? It won't count toward your grade."

"I know," I told her quietly, leaving the classroom and meeting Ed and Em in the front of the school.

"What's wrong, Mittens?" Edric teased me. "No reason to look so sad. Unless you developed a crush on that Luz girl, then you should be sad. She is way out of your league."

I glared at him, but Emira laughed. "He's not wrong, actually. Although if you do get a crush on her, be sure to let us know so that we can properly ship it."

I doubted I wanted to know the "proper" way to ship a couple, so I changed the subject. "I couldn't care less about that girl. I just got a bad grade on my PreCECA."

"So did I," Edric told me happily. "Completely flunked it. But look on the bright side! After a few years of getting grounded for the tests you didn't learn the material of, you get used to it." He would know. He had been grounded for his PreCECA grades for at least the past three years. I didn't, though. I was always the perfect child. I had perfect grades and perfect attendance a perfect track record of never once sneaking out and a perfect sexuality. The only thing Mother hated about me was my brown hair. The color didn't match the twins' hair, she said, and that was why we dyed it.

Point is, I couldn't make Mother or Father proud of me if I was failing tests this early in the year. They had told me countless times that I had to be good at everything if I wanted to make them proud. Fit in by liking the same things as everyone else, by fitting into society's boxes of normal. Stand out by being perfect at those boxes of normal. I wanted to make them proud, so of course I tried.

Then again, they had told Em and Ed all those things too, but they did things the way they wanted most of the time.

It didn't matter now. I was home. And I had to explain to my parents why I got such a bad grade on my test.

I took a deep breath and pushed open the door.

Author's note:
833 words. The next chapter will probably be in Amity's POV too. I used to hate the way all these authors would put cliffhangers, but I understand now. I can just imagine people glaring at the screen hating me for stopping right here. Don't know why that image is appealing to me, but it is. Thank you for reading, commenting, and/or voting!

Edit: Okay I know this has only been published for three minutes and I'm already editing, but read this edit anyway. Guys, I did not mean to publish it. I tried to click the save button but the publish button is RIGHT BY IT and I misclicked. And I don't know how to unpublish things.
So enjoy your two chapters on the same day. I won't update tomorrow because I would have updated this one tomorrow but yeah. Sorry.