Idol (Zayn Malik)

Chapter eight - Reliving old mistakes

(But really, the gif is so accurate to what is going to be discussed in this chapter so don't start, plz)

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Sophia's POV

So the night had passed from chill and nice to totally uncomfortable. It had all been nice until Zayn kicked Harry in the nuts. The poor guy was jealous because Haz had danced with his date. However, we were now getting back to the hotel. Silence predominated in the place. No one dared to speak.

"Care to end this silence?" Liam finally spoke. God, how I loved him.

"Yes" We all whispered.

"Got something to say, Zaynie?" Li asked to Zayn, who had been with his look at the ground during the whole trip.

Zayn looked up. His eyes met Astrid's and then Harry's. He took a moment to speak, but he finally opened his mouth.

"I'm sorry, Haz" he muttered "I have no idea what happened to me. I just got crazy. I am stupid. I never do this though and you know it. I don't know Haz, I do-"

"It's okay, Zayno" Harry interrupted him "We'll talk about this later" He ended clearly referring to Astrid's presence. Those two had to discuss everything about her the moment she was gone.

"Moving on..." Niall almost shouted.

"I'm tired as fuck" Lou stated.

"I am so too" El lay her head on Lou's chest. They were so cuuute!

"I have a question for Astrid" Niall said making me sigh. That guy always made the most random questions.

Astrid looked at him, showing him that he had her complete attention.

"Have you ever...been disappointed on us?" He asked.

She stayed with her mouth open for a while.

"What do you mean?" she responded after a while.

"Let me reformulate it." He continued moving his hands "Have we ever done something that has made you think that we were such awful idols".

We all laughed lightly, as knowing that she would obviously deny the statement.

"Yes."

???

"Don't take it bad guys, but yes, I've been very disappointed in you... a lot of times" she said to our surprise.

"Justify your response" Liam added sweetly.

"Firstly, some time ago I was told that you didn't treat your fans right. Although I now know the background of Zayn's behavior last night, it wasn't good. By any point of view." Astrid explained. Zayn was looking at the ground. He had shame in his eyes. "I'm not meaning to make you feel bad, guys" she said looking at Zayn "It's just an example. I don't know if it has happened any other time with any other member of the group, but for what I've lived in first hand, that is what I think".

Silence.

"What else?" Zayn whispered, almost inaudible

"I...I..."She doubted "Do you really want me to say that?" the guys nodded silently. They wanted to know. "So, I was pretty mad about this one for a while" She added after some seconds "When that video was posted on the internet of you guys smoking pot, it broke my heart." The guys were on shock. Zayn was completely shocked. "I mean, not to relive old phantoms, but I thought it was really bad" she paused "I...I did know...I suspected that you guys did it, did pot, but the fact that you did it before a concert...it's just a big fuck you for the fans. I saw the videos of that concert...Zayn, darling, you didn't even sing all of your parts. Imagine how those little Zayn girls felt when their idol was wandering around as if he had no clue of where he was. They must have been heartbroken".

Everyone was shocked. Astrid did not speak any longer.

"Look. I understand that it was a mistake and everything, and that you're human and you are not perfect. The thing, what you don't understand is that the fans do think that you're perfect. They idolize you. And seeing a video of your idol smoking pot before a concert you've waited ages to attend to and will later call the best day of your life isn't nice. Trust me, it isn't" She was right, but the guys didn't react. I guess they didn't see that coming. Neither of us did.

Harry was the first one to do something. He nodded in agreement and said that he was sorry, even though he had never smoked pot. My Li apologized too, but I knew that he could never do drugs in a million years. After some time, Niall got out of his bubble and started randomly laughing. He then said that he was sorry and that he would eat less, so he could be a better example for the little girls.

Idiot.

Lou and Zayn took a little longer to speak. Lou finally moved after El hit him softly. He half smiled and looked at Astrid. "I'm sorry, darling. I know it was effed up. I don't even understand myself. I'm not asking you to forgive me. I know I did shit. I'm just saying that I accept it, and I promise, I swear that I won't do that, or anything nearly close to that ever again". Astrid looked at him and smiled. She then jumped off her seat in the van to give him a hug.

We all now stared at Zayn, patiently waiting for his pronouncement. He made a sign with one of his fingers and said "Don't think that I'm avoiding this, I'm just looking for the perfect words".

After some minutes he broke his silence.

"I'm sorry, though I know that I don't deserve your forgiveness" he muttered "We never talked about that day, and I won't justify my actions. I will just apologize for not having stepped forward and having made Liam do it. It wasn't fair, for any of us." He pronounced an apology that had been waited for years. "As for you, my darling" he continued referring to Astrid "I owe you more than an apology. Today I acted like an asshole." He stopped abruptly, as if he was going to cry right there "But I can't do this right now. I promise...I promise I'll tell you everything" he now looked directly to her. "But I can't do it right here, right now. I will do it. I will." He spoke making Astrid almost let some tears out. They both hugged and everything was cool again.

Everything but Harry and Zayn.

The tension between Harry and Zayn could still be felt in the ambiance. It broke my heart seeing Zayn's eyes full of sadness while he looked at Astrid.

I think that he really liked her.

We got to the hotel in a while, after a time of awkwardness and small talk. We were leaving the following day. We decided that we'd say goodbye to Astrid tomorrow. As soon as we stepped on the hotel's ground, Zayn grabbed Astrid's hand and took her to a side. He whispered something in her ear and she nodded. She then gave us a small smile and went with him.

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