Now that I am single. I decided that I can act and do whatever the fuck I want. I should've done it this whole time with Payton or not. So, I woke up early and worked out.
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After I did my workout, I invited Jaden to go with me to get coffee. He of course said yes and sat in the passenger seat.
Jaden: "So are you and Payton okay?" he asked, guiding his eyes to the side of my face.
Nicole: "Nope, we broke up yesterday morning." I said.
Jaden: "Oh really? I'm so sorry." he said in a sad tone.
Nicole: "It's fine i'm over it." I said.
Jaden: "Liar." he said.
Nicole: "I'm not lying." I said, trying to hold tears back.
Jaden: "Nicole, you can tell me if your hurting. I won't ever judge you." he said, gentle holding my hand.
Then the waterworks came flooding from my eyes.
Nicole: "Oh my god i'm so sorry." I sobbed.
Jaden: "Nicole, you are going through a break up and it hasn't even been a day yet. Don't ever apologize for something like this. Understand?" he asked.
I nodded and we got coffee and drove home.
~One week later~
This was miserable. The one time I put effort into a relationship, this happens. And it's so childish. How and why would you even think that I was cheating on him. Blows my mind. I haven't put on makeup, and I haven't talked hardly all week. I've been in my room pretty much and Mads and Avani have been in and out bringing food and comforting me. But there hasn't been a day yet that I haven't woken up with swollen eyes and not being able to breathe out of my nose. Let's just say it's been a rough week.
I haven't hardly seen Payton either. I saw him once or twice the whole week. And when he is out of his room, he's either a dick to everyone or trying to talk to me.
"Payton just leave me alone!"
"Nicole, please just talk to me."
"Get the fuck away from me before I blow your head off."
Besides that, he hasn't been seen by anyone else.
This morning, I woke up early. I haven't been getting any sleep and if I did, I would continuously wake up early. So this morning it was 5 am. The sun hasn't even came up yet. I haven't really seen any hope latelly for anything. The good news is that Porter hasn't told me about any missions. So that's one less thing I don't have to worry about. Everyone comes back today too, so i'm going to prepare to tell the story about a thousand times more. So I got up and took a look in the white gold, full length mirror. Highly disappointing.
I let out a soft tear and looked away. I can't stand to look at myself like this anymore. I went to the shower, and turned it on heat. I slowly took out my messy bun, and removed my clothes on by one. I hated looking at my body. Because his hands had touched every inch of it. I had to look away. I stood in the shower. Softly crying, yet letting the steaming water rinse the tears off. I showered for a while because it was the only place that had calmed me down. I dried off, and sat on the floor with a towel wrapped around my chest.
I heard a soft knock on the door.
"Nicole can I come in?" someone asked.
I reached up from the floor, unlocked the door, and sat back away from the door. The door handle turned to the right and in the reflection it revealed Payton. I froze. I didn't know what to do. He slowly approached me through the doorway.
Nicole: "What are you doing?" I asked quietly.
Payton: "Will you listen to me for a second, please?" he begged.
I nodded.
Payton: "Look, I shouldn't have accused you of cheating. I was very wrong to not trust you and i'm truly truly sorry. It was childish for us to break up too." he explained.
Nicole: "It wasn't childish, if you truly loved me and trusted me, then you shouldn't have came at me like that. You luckily you aren't dead right now." I said, turning my back so I didn't cry.
Payton: "Can we please get back together? please baby." he pleaded.
I took a deep breath and looked at my feet.
Nicole: "I want to so bad, you have no idea. But I cannot trust you." I said.
Payton: "Baby why?" he asked.
Nicole: "Did you really think I was that stupid?" I asked turning round.
He looked confused.
Nicole: "C'mon darling, I know you brought a girl here and fucked her." I said smiling a little.
He look traumatized.
Nicole: "Now, you didn't know that I knew did you? So, before I do something that I will regret, then get the fuck out." I said angry.
Payton: "Nicole I-"
I pulled out a gun from my bathroom drawer. One hand holding my towel and one hand holding the gun.
He was at a loss for words. So he slowly backed up and out the door. I followed him out with the gun in my hand still; pointed at his forehead. I shut the room door and looked it, lowered my gun and dropped to the floor. I couldn't hold anything back anymore. I slid down the door and sobbed into my hands. I screamed and cried for what seemed like hours. And it had to be only like 10 am at the most. I eventually pulled myself together and heard yet another knock at the door.
Nicole: "Payton go away!" I yelled.
"Bubs it's me, tayler." he said and opened the door.
I stood up and had tears forming in my eyes again.
Tayler: "Come here." he said, opening his arms.
I dove into his arms and he let me cry into his chest until he picked me up and carried me to the bathroom. He set me on the counter and wiped my tears away with his thumb.
Nicole: "I'm so pathetic." I mompd.
Tayler: "Bubs your not. Your going through a rough time right now and you have every right to not be tough." he said.
Tayler: "Everything will be okay, I promise." he convinced me.
I nodded and he rested his and on my cheek as I rested there.
Tayler: "Now, let's get you changed." he said smiling.
