The Boy and The Psycho

743

Young Five and I walk beside each other while Luther and older Five walks ahead of us.

"What are you looking at?" He turns to a woman behind us who's clearly not looking at us.

"Five! What the hell?" I whisper yell as I pull him back to walk with me.

"See something funny? She's mine, not yours!" He shouts behind us at the woman.

I turn to her and smile, waving off Five as I pull him along.

"Mind your business! Or I'll give you something to stare at! You wish you could pull off these shorts!" Five shouts at the other people passing us.

"Five, stop!" I whisper yell at him as he pulls me away protectively from the other men passing us.

Luther stops walking and waits for us as the older Five continues ahead.

"Hey, family. How you doing, Five?" He asks.

"He's gonna kill me, isn't he?" Five asks randomly.

Luther scoffs then laughs, "What? What, him? He's gonna kill you? Yeah, right. That's ridiculous."

"You know, you're a terrible liar, Luther," I point out as we continue down the stairs.

"You're a worse liar than you are a spotter," Five adds.

"Okay, whose fault is that? What good is having spotters if you won't even listen to them?" Luther whisper yells.

"So you admit you're conspiring against me?"

"Hey, not me," I defend as I raise my hands up.

"Do... Do you admit that you're suffering from paradox psychosis?" Luther asks, ignoring my comment.

"All I'm suffering from is bracing clarity about you and your murderous intentions," Five explains as he itches himself.

"Look, it's not like he's gonna "kill you" kill you. He just wants to kill a, um... version of you," Luther explains nicely.

"But I am that version of me," Five shouts.

"Hey, I don't love it, either, but he's actually got a pretty good plan."

"What? The one where you guys off me and then jump to 2019 to save the world?"

"Five, I would never do that or let that happen," I explain as I scoff up at Luther.

"Yeah, wait, how did you know that?"

"Because I'm him, and that is exactly what I would do if I were trying to kill me!" Five shouts as he twitches weirdly.

"Okay, all I know is we've got one Five too many, and you're the one acting like a maniac," Luther admits.

"Maniac? Luther, you have seen nothing. If you want a maniac, I will show you maniac," Five shouts up at Luther, leaning across me.

He speed walks forward, leaving Luther and I to pick up the pace to join him again.

"Okay, as your spotters, I think the best thing we can do for you right now is put you out of your misery," Luther points at Five.

"Hey, he is acting crazy, but he's my crazy. I will not be killing him anytime soon," I look up at Luther with a glare.

"Okay, Luther, listen," Five stops and grabs Luther's shoulders, "I know your feeble mind only responds to age and authority, so listen very closely. Yet again, you are experiencing daddy issues, this time with your own brother, which honestly is making me a bit crazy. But remember this: I'm 14 days older than him. I have seniority here. So it is me you two should be listening to. I'm the daddy here!" Five shouts the last part, causing Luther and I to turn around and chuckle.

"How's it going?" Luther asks a pedestrian, forcing a laugh.

We both stop suddenly and turn back to Five.

"Five, please, you're being unseemly. Look at you," Luther whisper shouts as the two of us guide Five up the street.

"I admit there is a possibility that I may not be in my fully... right mind right now."

"Okay, good," I sigh with relief.

"But whatever I've got, he's got it too," Five explains, pointing up to the older version of himself and walks ahead of us.

"You three quit grab-assing. We're here," the older Five shouts back at us.

We walk up to a white fence next to a parking lot as people chatter loudly somewhere in front of us. The older Five sets down his briefcases, farting loudly.

"Flatulence. Stage four," Luther mumbles to me.

"See? What's your plan now, bucko?" Five asks as he farts as well causing me to step closer to Luther, "that was just lunch, all right? Shut up."

I look around at the other three as I think about all the possible things that could happen in the hours to come.

-------------------------------------------

"... the Dallas-Fort Worth area broadcast, here brings you a special description of the arrival of President John F. Kennedy. At this moment, three special..."

"This is my favorite part," the older Five interrupts the radioman as he clicks his sniper together, "the calm before the storm."

Luther, young Five, and I stand back, observing the older man as he sets up his area.

"Look. The briefcase," Five whispers closely into my ear.

"No, don't. You won't be able to get there in time," I whisper sternly at him as I grab his arm.

"Of course I will. This is our only chance, my love," he explains.

"Hey, uh, just remind me... what was the final stage of paradox psychosis again?" Luther asks.

"Homicidal rage," I remind him, tilting my head to look up at him.

"Right. Thanks, sis. That's great," he says the last part slowly as we both watch Five sneak closer to his older self.

"Five, listen to me. I..." I begin but he ignores me and moves quickly to the older Five.

"No. No!" Luther sputters, but it's too late.

All of a sudden, younger Five blinks to the spot where older Five is but the old man is already gone, back where Five just was.

"Oh... shit," I drag as I watch the scene unfold.

"Bad idea, shit heel," the older Five says as he cocks his sniper and aims it at Five.

All of a sudden, Luther marches up to the older man and grabs the gun from him.

"Stop it! All right? The both of you. Pull it together. Now, Kennedy is gonna be coming around that corner any minute. Okay, so everyone, let's just take a deep breath..." Luther and I take a deep breath together as the two Five's shakenly take theirs.

"Now, we're all family here, okay? So can we all just try to get along for a few more minutes?" Luther continues.

"You want it?" The younger Five turns to his older self.

"Go ahead," the older Five smirks.

"What's that?" Luther asks.

All of a sudden, younger Five walks forward and kicks Luther right in the groin, causing him to groan and bend over forwards, dropping the gun.

"Now..." The older Five starts.

"Where were we?" The younger Five finishes.

As Luther stands in the center of the small area we occupy, I sigh as I walk over and hop up onto the hood of a car, watching the two Five's blink it out in front of me.

As they blink all around the parking lot in a matter of seconds, they both blink beside Luther, kicking him in the stomach at the same time, causing him to groan again. I hiss as I watch him double over himself again.

"Hey! I'm getting really sick of this! Fiona! Do something!" Luther shouts, but I ignore him as I watch the two Five's.

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EDITED