Dirk Gently and The Waking Sea of Reality

Goats?

I have something I need to get off my chest.

       I've been lying to you.

       Sorry.

       This case... it's not exactly your normal case. Back to the whole "normal is normal and isn't normal because odd is normal and normal is odd but odd is also odd and isn't odd at the same time and frankly the English language and human nature is a bit of a bloody mess isn't it?!" thing and what was I saying? Right... not a "normal" case.

       Normal for Dirk is odd as a default and is therefore normal by default as a result- and I'm doing it again...

       A horse in a bathroom, an impossibly stuck couch, a kitten-shark, just the Bofuki Nepoo themselves, a giant life-like mechanical worm... yes, that's all very normal. All fine and dandy! Very not fine and dandy!

       What I'm trying to say is, this case isn't a simple drug bust. It's much bigger.

       What if I were to tell you that the name "Dirk Gently" had been the center of not only one prophecy? No, that would be absolutely ludicrous . He was, in fact, the center of five prophecies, but that's for another day. For the purposes of this story, this prophecy is the second prophecy that has to do with the ending of a world.

       See, the Mayans were not far off in their estimation of Earth's end in 2012, they were only six years off. 6 ? That's a specific number. Triple that and you have the devil's number.

       Coincidence?

       Yes.

       No.

       Probably? Possibly? Scratch that, definitely a coincidence. Only... everything is connected.

       What if it was the devil's number because it was triple the amount that the estimation of the world's end was off due to the devilish act of stupid drunkenness due to fermented cocoa beans.

       Yes, that's how the estimation was made. It seems a lot of existence's problems were born from drunken mistakes. So, no. Definitely not a coincidence.

       The apocalypse was set for November of 2018. And it was up to Dirk to stop it.

       But he doesn't know that yet.

       What he does know?

       "There are bloody goats at this warehouse!"

       It was the next day, around noon or such and they stood facing the goat covered warehouse parking lot in the daylight.

       "So it wasn't a dream, I wasn't drugged... there are goats at this warehouse!" Dirk continued. "You know we have to do something illegal, right?"

       "Eh," Todd shrugged. "They won't call the cops on us for breaking into where they probably make the drugs."

       "I brought a lockpick," Farah said.

       "Excellent assisting." Dirk smiled with a pat on her shoulder.

       With Bean in toe, yes they brought Bean- Of course, she had to come with, Todd. She's an assis-pet! Dirk insisted- they picked the lock and opened the gate.

       The goats all ushered around them, attempting to chew on their clothes but Bean growled at them, sending them running.

       "Good girl, Bean!" Dirk said and she jumped with a happy yap. Todd just rolled his eyes with what can only be described as a very Todd smile. "Now, be quiet, we don't know if anyone is here."