Lady Blue

Online 33

7:00 PM

Erza: hello lady blue gud pm

Lady Blue: Hi! How can I help you?

Erza: I want an advice sana about sa condition ko.

Lady Blue: Condition?

Erza: yes lady blue. I experienced something tragic kasi almost three years ago. at hanggang ngayon mukhang hindi pa din ako nakakarecover.

7:12 PM

Lady Blue: Something tragic? Kung hindi mo mamasamain, pwede bang ikwento mo kung anong nangyari?

Erza: okay.

Erza: my mother died after giving birth to me. my father died the next year because of cancer. and 3 years ago when my little brother was murdered. nagkataon kasing may murder na nangyari sa dinadaanan ng brother ko galing school. maybe because he saw the crime that's why they killed him too. my only family died that day and I was left alone.

Erza: and the next years felt like hell. may mga relatives naman akong dumamay sakin pero wala iyong natulong. I became depressed and even committed suicide more than ten times. pero lagi akong nakakaligtas.

Erza: I stopped going to school. muntik na din nila akong ipasok sa mental dahil sa condition ko. and for those three years, I keep seeing a hallucination of my brother. and up until now, I still keep seeing him.

Erza: the doctors said that I became better now than the last years. I underwent therapies and medications. mukha nga pong magaling na ako at nakakapag-isip na din po ako nang maayos. but I don't think I have fully recovered. because I still keep seeing a hallucination of my brother.

Erza: he runs around. he smiles at me. he sleeps with me. he watch me and I can even talk to him. Im close to thinking that he's not a hallucination anymore and he's really my brother. or maybe a ghost. pero lagi akong pinapaalalahanan ng mga tita ko na hindi siya totoo at bitawan ko na siya.

Erza: but how can I even let go of my own brother? why do I need to do that? I don't know what to do lady blue. ayoko na pong komunsulta sa mga doktor dahil natatakot akong baka sabihin nilang nababaliw na naman po ako. that's why I decided to just talk to you.

Erza: what should I do?

7:32 PM

Lady Blue: I'm sorry for your loss. I appreciate na iniisip mong matutulungan kita pero hindi din ako sigurado kung makakatulong talaga ako. I'm not a doctor and baka mairecommed ko lang na magtake ka ng medication like amisulpride and the likes. I don't know what to say.

Lady Blue: I'm sorry.

Erza: Its okay. maybe my condition really needs a professional help right?

Lady Blue: Yes.

Erza: but I want your help too. give me your words lady blue. kahit hindi ka sigurado ay makikinig ako. or magbabasa. just give me your words. I badly need them.

Lady Blue: You want my words?

Erza: yes. a word from you is one in a billion. only a word from you can already save hundreds of lives. lady blue's words opened thousands of doors to happiness. kung nagawa mo sa iba ay siguradong magagawa mo din sa akin. all I need is your words.

Erza: please help me. I need your words.

Lady Blue: Thank you. Hindi ako sigurado kung talagang makakatulong talaga ako. But I'll tell you what I think you need to do.

7:49 PM

Lady Blue: You asked why you should let go of your brother, right? It's because it's locking you up in that tragedy three years ago. You need to let go in order to move forward.

Lady Blue: You attempted suicide because you wanted to escape. You had gone crazy because you couldn't understand. You were confused. You kept seeing your brother because you can't accept the fact that he's dead. You were afraid to be alone. The fear of being alone made you create an illusion that will aid your loneliness. But it ended up worsening your condition. Because as long as he's there, you will always be in the past. That's why you need to stop.

Erza: but why? If I can see my brother by having hallucinations, why do I need to stop? why can't I just keep hallucinating in order to feel that he's with me?

7:55 PM

Lady Blue: Because you will never make it to the future. That illusion is a chain from the past. You need to free yourself because no one will do it for you. If you will keep looking back at the past, you will never be able to move forward. The one who faces the opposite direction will never reach his destination. You need to let go.

Erza: but I don't want to forget my brother.

Lady Blue: Letting go doesn't mean you'll forget them. Letting go means freeing them as well as yourself. Past is past. The most important thing is what lies ahead. And in order to know that, you need to face forward. Then live.

Erza: mukhang tama ka lady blue. I can see my brother, yes. but I don't feel his warmth. because he's fake. letting go means setting myself and my brother free, right?

Lady Blue: Yes.

Erza: now I understand. I feel bad that I kept holding him back for the past years. it's time to break the chains and take a step forward.

Lady Blue: That's right. Sigurado akong kahit hindi mo na siya nakikita, gagabayan ka pa din niya.

8:03 PM

Erza: I know.

Lady Blue: What the eyes see is important, but what really matters is what the heart feels. You may not be able to see them but they will always be there. In your heart.

Erza: Thank you.

Lady Blue: :)

•°•°•

This will be the last advice in this book. I hope you learned something.

Please vote and comment. Thank you!

—M.