So Soft (Radiodust Story)

Fuck.

(Alastor POV)

But, no crowds. Nothing on the radio. Surely the Radio Demon being with the one and only Angel Dust would be somewhat news worthy? Or even just one demon coming to my door asking about it? Not even Vaggie mentioned anything to me when I saw her, she even asked if I was 'good'. I wasn't. But when was that new?

"Hey Al." Husker raised a hand to me as I left my office to head up for the night. I hadn't talked to him for about a day. Being around him just make me nervous. So I continued to ignore him until I found a way to deal with it.

I lay on my bed, pondering about it, should I just come out with it? Would that make me feel normal again? "Hey, just wanted to say that I had se- I had se- I slept with Angel Dust." Nope. Nope nope nope not happening. Just saying it out loud to myself made a lump form in my throat. What would Charlie say?...

"Excuse me, Mr Alastor?" Nifty was at the door.
"I'm busy right now dear, please come back later."
"But Mr Alastor-"
"I said I am busy, please leave."
"But, Mr Ala-"
I threw open the door. "I SAID LEAVE!!"
My scream didn't even faze her.
"Mr Husker said he would like to talk to you, now please." Then she just walked away. What a strange demon girl.

"I think the entire building shook when you yelled just now. Impressive."
"What do you want Husker?"
"Directly to it, as usual. I want to know why you're ignoring me."
"Because of what you said the other day. It made me feel weird. So I decided that not being around you was best."
"About what I said? About you and Angel? Al I was just joking with you, I don't care."
"Yes but you've surely told everyone and they are all just whispering about it and I don't know how to feel about it and-"
"Yo, yo, Al, I said I was joking. You're making it seem like you're not."
I froze. He was actually joking it seems. He didn't know, and now he does. Shit.
"Al," he began slowly, "did you, did you have sex with Angel? I'm asking for real this time."
I slowly nodded and then threw my face into my hands. "Please don't tell."
"Oh my god you actually did. Wow, okay. Why you being so weird about it, and what does that have to do with you ignoring me?"
"I was ignoring you," I started, tackling the easier question first, "because I thought you actually knew yesterday, and I decided that if I didn't see you, I wouldn't have to deal with how weird it made me feel. So I avoided you, like a coward."
"That's pretty stupid for such a smart guy, but I get it. Dignity and what not." He rolled his hand with that, and nudged his head, trying to get me to go on.
"I feel weird about it, because I didn't want it. Just thinking about it makes me-" my head shook to one side violently, and my hands raised as if trying to catch it. "I don't like to think about it."
"If you didn't want it, why'd you have it?"
"Heat."
"Ah, right. Didn't realise it was that bad though."
"It was never that bad. But then again, I have had nearly 1000 heats so that probably explains it."
"Wow. It's impressive you held out that long. I'm proud of you for dealing with it though. It's better than having you act like a dick for a week."
"Thank you, Husker." My sarcasm was obvious.
"No problem pal.  You know I won't actually say anything, I was just messing with you yesterday. I don't give two shits about what you do and who you do."
"Oh. Well thank you." I'm still not used to having people just, trust me, and being able to trust them. 100 years in hell will do that to you.
"I only brought it up because you and Angel are genuinely closer now, guess that's why though, heh."
"Before you get any ideas, I wasn't doing anything with Angel yesterday in that closet, or any other day. I'm not dating him or anything."
"Yeah, yeah, no worries. But you wish you were, don't you?
"I beg your pardon?"
"Oh come on Al, we both know you're not that stupid. I've seen how you act, making food, letting him actually sit near you, letting him cuddle up to you, I even saw you two dancing that one time. I've known you longer than anyone here, and I know what I'm seeing when it's in front of me. I'd even go so far to say that you liked him, unless I wanted to loose my head." Husker laughed to himself and turned away to start putting the glasses he was polishing in the cupboard in the bar. But my world stopped.
Is that what it is? Why I don't mind that he's close to me, why dancing with him was so fun, why I secretly enjoyed his cuddles, why I wanted him to hold me when we were in that closet. No, no I'm just being nice. Aren't I?

"Al? You're zoned wayyy out again. Al?"
I didn't respond, my head was spinning.
"Shit. I think I've broken him. Al? Don't make me get Charlie."
"DON'T YOU DARE!" I had stood up, hands slammed on the counter.
"Hehe, okay. Calm down. By your response, I'm right, aren't I? Hehe you're a fool sometimes.
"I'll say one thing; Angel was right. You're a very good bar keep." I smiled and nodded to him, and walked away, to tired to think clearly.

Sleep was not my friend that night. I gave up at about 3 am, and went to grab something to eat, before getting started on some of the paperwork I missed. The kitchen light was on. I peered around the corner, and saw Angel humming to himself, Fat Nuggets oinking at his feet. "Yeah, yeah, hang on babe, lemme find it. Got it!" He pulled out a sheet of jerky and the pig squealed in delight. Angels smile was soft and happy. It was cute how much he cared for the animal

"I'd even go so far to say that you liked him."

Fuck.