Falling - Bellamy Blake X Reader

Chapter 22

(Y/N POV)
"Okay go ahead, what is it." I say whiling placing my hand on his arm trying to calm his very anxious state. Rivers takes a deep breathe preparing for what he's going to say, he opens his mouth to speak but no words are formed.

"Nope." Is all he says before shaking his head and taking off down the hall.

"What the fuck." I mutter to myself shaking my head in not only disbelief but confusion also. I enter my room to find my dinner is sitting on my table waiting to be eaten. I push the whole River situation out of my head and begin digging into the food, considering I not only didn't eat lunch but I also trained my ass off. I was absolutely starving to say the least. After eating I did my new nightly routine that mainly consisted of showering. Once I was nice and clean I slipped underneath my covers ready for the veil of sleep to consume me. I drift off into the world of slumber fairly quickly, which is weird considering all the thoughts that are dancing around not stop. Most of them include River and whatever is going on with him but a few seem to involve Lucas I can't seem to put my finger on why.

Timeskip
A uneventful few days pass and River has taken a liking to avoiding me at all costs, when I entered a room he would immediately leave, if I was walking in his direction he would speed walk the other way and I was getting sick of it. But some good things came out of the last couple of days like one being Lucas and I have been spending more time together, and another being is that I managed to pick up the grounder language straight away so I'm now fluent in two languages, which is pretty cool, I've also progressed in training and am now the best warrior out there, even better then Lexa. The last good things are that all the grounders have come to peace with the that I'm here and am one of them, they've all finally accepted me as one of there own. Another plus is that Lexa and I have formed a close bond, I now refer to her as my sister and she does the same. (Whenever I write in grounder language it will be in bold.) The time spent with Lucas was a great distraction from thinking about River, Lucas would do anything in his power for me to be happy and that's one of the things I've come to love about him.

But hanging out with him has put me at a crossroads type of a situation, I know for a fact I have feelings for River that are inevitable but feelings for Lucas have been developing as I get to know him more. Not only do I have feeling for two different guys but Bellamys still seems to be at the back of my mind and I can't get him to go away, no matter what I try he's still there. The one thing I do know for sure is that my feelings for River are the strongest but seeing that he's ignoring me at the moment it doesn't help that much. As of right now I'm getting ready to go to a meeting with the sky people that Lincoln set up. I have little to no respect for them after they set one my clans villages on fire. Lexa has instructed me to wear a hood to cover my face and never to take it off unless necessary. I throw on my black flow cloak before walking out of my room to go meet Lexa, not planning on putting up my hood until we're near the meeting place. When I reach our stables where Lexa said to meet I not only see her but two other unknown figures next to her. I stalk closer getting a better look to find out the unknown figures aren't unknown at all, they're River and Lucas. I mentally curse at Lexa in my head for bringing them along, she of all people should know better then to have them come.

As I make my way to them I clear my head of any thought and act like everything is normal.

"Finally you made it," Lexa says as she see me come into her view, "We leave in a few minutes after I go round everyone else up. River, Lucas, explain to Y/n the plan while I'm gone." She finishes before going to the public to let everyone know we're leaving. I look at River excepting him to explain the plan but instead he looks everywhere but my direction. I scoff at his actions and look to Lucas for the plan.

"Okay well since River seems to be acting weird I guess I'll tell you," Lucas says noticing Rivers odd behavior around me, "So Lincoln said no weapons but we obviously aren't going to do that so everyone will have their weapons on them and Lexa also will have archers hidden in the trees while you guys go up to talk to the sky people. Lexa mentioned you have a hood you need to put in beforehand so they won't recognize you, she said she would let you stay back but she thinks its essential for you to see because one day you'll be commander and being there will help you learn how to be one." I nod taking in all the information and signaling to Lucas I understand before adjusting my weapons so they sit more comfortably.

While doing so I feel a pair of eyes practically burning holes into my head, I glance up to spot Lucas and his attention focused on taking care of his horse. Coming to the conclusion Lucas wasn't the one staring at me I move my gaze over to River to find him frantically looking away from my direction, I found the culprit. Getting fed up with him and his strange behavior I stomp over to him and harshly grab his arm pulling him out of the stables before Lucas has the chance to notice.

"What the fuck is your problem River? I'm sick and tired of this bullshit." I yell not being able to control my emotions anymore, all he does is look at the ground as a response.

"Really that's all I get? Why can't you at least fucking look at me? What did I do to make you hate me this much?" At this point I had tears brimming my eyes threatening to fall. When I asked the last question Rivers head shot up with a confused look on his face but it soon morphed into a worried one when he saw the tear that managed get loose sliding down my cheek.

"Hate you? I could never hate you even if I tried." He states while cupping my face and brushing away the stray tear using his thumb, without realizing it I leaned into his touch but it didn't go unnoticed by River because a gentle smile appeared on his face.

"Well if you don't hate me why have you been avoiding me?" A guilty yet nervous expression falls onto his face at what I ask.

"Its complicated." Is the answer I get but I'm not having it so I say, "I can handled complicated, my whole life is considered complicated so tell me why the fuck you've been avoiding me right now or so god hel-" I begin to raise my voice at the end but only to get cut of by River shouting louder then me, "Its because I've fallen in love with you and it scares me!"

*finished editing*

A/n
another cliffhanger? i think yes :)