|The sea| Wilbur x reader

7: shower

 TW: ed and intrusive thoughts 

It was almost 11 when i arrived home. I shut the door to my flat silently and headed to the living room. I assumed my insomniac friends were still awake. Maybe streaming or watching a movie.

Sitting on our thrifted couch were my best friends, and roommates, Chelsea and Eliza. As I approached them their heads turned to look at me.

"Your back!" Exclaimed Chelsea. Her bright green eyes scanning my body. Eliza just gave me a nod, her faded purple hair bouncing around.

"How was your date! Come sit and tell us all about it!" Chelsea said while patting a spot on the couch next to her. As I sat down Eliza muted the TV and turned to me.The eagerness and excitement in their eyes made me burst out laughing.

"First of all it wasn't a Date, per say. Secondly it was great! He took me to London and we went to Barnes and Nobles and strolled through the city." I spoke while motioning to the bag beside me filled to the brim with books.

"He's so romantic!" Cooed Chelsea while Eliza rolled her eyes.

"How is it not a date. He brought you coffee and books. It's obvious he likes you." she laughed. My face heated up. Did I like Wilbur? I mean he was so sweet, helped my career and always went out of my way to acknowledge me. But could we be something more? My hopes started to be lifted but a small voice crept into my thoughts.

How could he love a freak like you?

He couldn't love someone with your issues.

You're worthless.

My stomach clenched. He couldn't love me. I kept the feelings inside. Outside I kept smiling.

"Hey, I'm really tired today. I'm going to head to bed..." I sighed. Eliza and Chelsea shot me concerned looks.

"Im fine, really. Just tired." I shot back. Quickly I got off the couch and left to my room to avoid an interrogation. Chelsea and Eliza were unaware of my ED but suspicious. I always played off not eating because of nausea or anxiety. They scolded me, telling me I should eat but never pushed too far.

Scalding water rained on my body, the water turned up all the way. The hot water usually calmed me or infuriated me. Sometimes I stayed in it so long my skin turned red and flaky. Today though, I sat on the tub floor. The water was a bit cooler down here and it was a bit softer. I really wasn't even thinking. Just spaced out.

I scrubbed the lavender shampoo into my hair, scratching my scalp. My hair was something I used to pride myself in. I still did, but it was starting to fall out. What was once thick golden hair was now brown-ish thin hair.

I continued my shower as normal. This time I stayed a bit shorter than usual. Still enough to leave my body red. I turned the knob so the water would be off and grabbed the plush white towel on the sink. The whole room was steamy, fogging the mirrors and suffocating my lungs. I applied my usually cherry blossom lotion and combed through my hair.

I entered my bedroom. It was a place of comfort. My walls were painted a light gray and airy curtains hung around my windows. Soft bulb fairy lights lined the ceiling and pictures filled up the space on my closet door. I lit a jasmine candle before dressing for bed. I slipped on an oversized crew neck and flannel pj pants. My normal day to day outfit I guess.

My room was quite comfy. The only light being from the candle and fairy lights. Books lay streamed across my floor. Mostly poetry and fantasy books. I guess I had used reading as an escape mechanism. Infact, when i wasn't sleeping or streaming i would read. I could read for hours on end and finish multiple books in one day. I kicked aside dirty clothes as I slid into bed. My floral sheets encompass me in warmth.

I fell asleep mindlessly scrolling through tik tok.