never grow up.

18. reminders

(A'n: Hey guys. I know you've been waiting for a while. I just started university back up again and I was on a job search. I also am writing two novels for Amazon. I'm sorry to have gotten to you all so late. Love you all)

"Try this, Shuhua!"

There was a kabab-styled skewer that Minnie had handed to me. We were in the streets of Tokyo, trying out street food. I took a piece and savored the savory flavors on my tongue. "It's delicious."

"Oishii," Yuqi said. "Means delicious."

Soyeon nibbled off of Yuqi's plate. "You're more oishii."

Minnie crossed her arms over her chest. "No sexual innuendos please!"

I roll my eyes. "I feel like we're gonna have a lot of that. Are we staying in a hotel together?"

"I got us at the Hyatt, but I got us two suites. One for me and one for you three."

"Soyeonnie, I don't wanna room with these two. They've given me headaches all this week," Yuqi whined grabbing Soyeon's arm.

I rolled my eyes, cringing. Minnie chuckled and sipped her iced coffee. The air in Japan was a little balmy. There were people in every corner. I looked up at the tall buildings and felt so small.

I missed home a little. It reminded me of Taipei, just a bit. I grew up just outside of the city. I finally had my mind outside of romance. I reached into my purse and decided to actually call my mother and father to tell them how I was doing. Within a couple of chimes, they picked up.

"Shuhua~" my mom answered. "Your father was just getting off work. You finally call us!"

"Hi, mom." I grinned awkwardly.

"AHH. Hi Mrs. Yeh!" Yuqi shouted.

"Mom!" Minnie added.

"You all shut up," I hissed.

"Say hello to my other daughters for me, Shuhua," my mom warmly replied back to them. "Where are you? Did you eat?"

"We're in Japan right now for a small vacation. We're eating yakitori." I turned to see Minnie ordering some udon noodles and beer. "And we're getting more food!"

"Don't gain too much weight, eh?" Mom said. "But, don't forget to eat, my daughter. Your father says hello."

I smile weakly, feeling very homesick. "Yeah. I'll be healthy. Take care of you and dad for me, okay?"

"Okay," Mom cooed as the line died.

When we signed into the hotel, Soyeon allowed us into her presidential suite. It was huge. Yuqi of course was smitten and began unpacking her clothes into drawers. Soyeon began serving us the alcohol. The window overlooked the busy city of Tokyo. I couldn't help but feel reminded of Soojin's apartment in Seoul. The one in UN Village, which was where my new residence was. I sulked and then ran through my messages between us.

I took one shot.

The message between us when she said she was on her way to pick me up.

Two shots.

Her telling me that I'm pretty and that she can't sleep.

Three.

"Shuhua, who are you on the phone with?" Yuqi asked.

"No one," I answered quickly.

My fingers hovered over the keyboard, desperately craving to say something. I didn't know what to say. Then again, I did.

I wanted to tell her that I missed her. I wanted her presence. It made no sense that when I thought of home, I thought of her. She was not synonymous with home. She was an oddity to my usual life.

My friends drank and eat like normal. They were happy to be here. I was once again, distant. I wanted to know how to feel something. Instead of sex and lust, what did feeling anything even feel like.

I put my phone down and took another shot.

"Are you okay?" Minnie asked.

Blinking back to reality, I nod slowly. "Yeah."

"You should eat. You barely ate anything today while we were out." Soyeon pushed a plate of food towards me. I could barely focus on it. I was put off by the smell and eventually I ran to the bathroom and threw up.

I went to the door as the girls were questioning me. Ignoring them, I went to the ice box out by the elevator. Rubbing my temple, I also got some ramen from a vending machine. I did not feel like eating whatever fancy food they had in the room. The expensive eating was starting to irk my soul. I missed something cheap and efficient.

I sat against the wall, drinking from the ramen cup and crunching the pieces of ice with my teeth. I blankly stared, rubbing my feet against the carpet. I was dissociating from everything. I wanted to know why. How could someone so vain, so mysterious taint my mind? I hated everything about her. But, I couldn't.

Soon enough, the elevator opened and a couple walked out of it. The man was dragging the woman by her wrist. I tried to avoid eye contact, but I couldn't help but watch their interaction. The man chuckled darkly as the woman pushed him against the door. I swallowed my ramen as I peeked my head from the corridor.

The man did not even bother fighting back. It was weird. The woman just kept punching. And then I recognized that they were speaking Korean.

I need to not get myself into another trap. I tried to walk back to my hotel room but then...

"AH. Sungah?" The man turned and I recognized it to be Hui. Or Ho Taek. Whatever his name was.

The woman turned in sheer horror. Her face went from angry to a ghastly pale. "Now I see why we're here," she snapped harshly at Hui.

I just wanted to get back to my hotel room but look where I am, once again. Soojin was in front of me. We can never escape each other. Isn't that great? Even in another country, she is here still.

Hui grinned mischievously. "Why can't we hang out with Sungah...or Shuhua? Whatever her name is." He looked between us. "You know I never saw you act like this before. Not for me or any of the whores I let you play with."

Soojin's lips pressed in a hard line.

I had nothing to say. I was praying someone could just come out and disrupt this tense moment. I felt my drunk headache get sharper.

"Soojin...don't tell me. You actually are in love with this kid." Hui's smile began to fade. "I disappear for a few months and you...you..." He shook his head, laughing.

"I don't love anybody," Soojin snapped. "She means nothing to me!" She looked at me. I could tell she was probably lying. Everything was starting to make sense. "All I did was fuck her."

Hui's jaw tightened. "Don't lie to me. You lost it when you saw her fuck around with Seungyeon. You drove her home immediately before we could even do anything else."

"She doesn't belong with this world!" Soojin yelled. "Hui...I don't think-"

"What is going on?" Soyeon's voice rang from down the hall. We all turned and noticed Soyeon's tiny stature down the hall with a gun on her hip.