Todoroki: Ayo Alex
Alex: What?
Todoroki: Have you considered being a male?
Alex: I'm not even gonna lie. I have, sometimes. I don't know why, but it's a random thought that comes to mind when I wake up at 3:00 AM and stay up till 7:00 AM cause I can't go back to sleep.
Todoroki: I mean, if everybody thinks you're a boy, why not be one?
Alex: Haha. No.
Todoroki: Why not?
Alex: My parents have always wanted a son, and my sisters want a brother, but no.
Bakugo: This is a weird conversation.
Alex: I know.
Todoroki: What are you even doing right now, Alex?
Alex: It it currently 7:37 AM and I'm waiting for my mom to come wake my sisters up for school.
Todoroki: And you're lying. You have a tab open on your computer with a list of boy names on it.
Alex: I was just looking.
Jiro: "I wAs JuSt LoOkInG."
Alex: ANYWAYS, let's talk about something else.
Todoroki: Fine.
Alex: The weirdest thing happened to me last night. I finally got my lazy ass up to find a charger to charge my phone, then I accidentally took a nap, I woke up and ate dinner, I turned my phone on and it said I had a missed call and 2 messages. I looked at the messages, and I was scared. The first one said, "You tried calling, sweetie?" I cringed. I looked at the second one, and it said, "Don't worry, we'll find out about the lawyer, sweetie." Like, ew. Then I blocked the number.
Todoroki: That does sound disturbing.
Jiro: Very.
Charlie: What the hell about a lawyer? This girl/guys' gf/bf a criminal or sum?
Alex: That's what I was wondering.
Charlie: Like, you finna get arrested if you helping out your criminal bf/gf.
Alex: What do y'all wanna talk about? I have to hurry up and get this chapter to at least 800 words so I can publish it and read the lovely comments that I get, then do the final art project for the end of the semester that I procrastinated on.
Todoroki: The one that was assigned last week on Monday and is due today?
Alex: That's the one.
Todoroki: You really have to work on focusing.
Alex: I know. My parents don't get that mad when it comes to my math grades though because they know that math is like trying to learn a new language for me. Once they checked my grades and I had like 5 incomplete math assignments, even though I completed them. But there another assignment that I completed that was able to get my math grade to a B, and I got so fucking lucky. If my grade was a C, then I wouldn't be able to insult random people on roblox during the weekend.
Todoroki: You just like being mean to people?
Alex: No. I'm actually a really nice person, and I usually don't just go up to people and call them ugly. They usually come up to me and insult me cause I dress like a slender. I use the excuse that I'm aro ace, and they leave me alone.
Todoroki: Pfft-
Charlie: I mean, good excuse.
Alex: Once I say that, they're like, "Oh, sorry." and then they walk away.
Todoroki: Why don't you change your damn avatar, and they won't bother you?
Alex: I mean, I should, cause random people see me standing with my sister, and they say, "Ship <3" Then I say that we're siblings. Once person in Royale High said that we could still make a good couple. Like, ew. Why would I date my own sister?
Todoroki: Yeah, uhm, I know how it feels. *Cough* TodoDabi fanfiction. *Cough*
Alex: I read some TodoDabi, and I just gotta say, why do they make Todoroki such a hoe? There was this one fanfiction that I read, Todoroki got a used laptop that used to be Natsuo's. In that chapter, he was eleven years old, and he started watching p*rn on it! Like Endeavor, you ain't gonna do a monthly search history check? What kind of father are you?
Todoroki: Ew. Also why did you censor it?
Alex: Saying it makes me uncomfortable.
Todoroki: Oh.
Alex: Shoto would purposely get himself caught by Dabi. Dabi asked him if he wanted to do IT, and Shoto said yes. Dabi told him to wait until he was thirteen. LIKE WTF?!?!?! When Shoto finally turned thirteen, he and Dabi quietly did IT.
Todoroki: I'M GETTING A MENTAL IMAGE!! HELP MEEE!
Alex: Then, when Shoto was 15, he ran away with Dabi and they became villains together. And did IT every night.
Bakugo: 👁️👄👁️
Todoroki: WAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! NOOOOOO! EWWWWW!
Jiro: sWEEt hOMe aLABAMa!!!!
Alex: And somehow I was able to get sleep that night.
Todoroki: I DON'T THINK I'M GETTING SLEEP EVER AGAIN!!!
Shinso: What year is it?
Alex: 2021.
Shinso: Oh wow. I haven't slept since 2005.
Alex: The year you were born in?
Todoroki: Pfft-
Alex: Anyways, scarring poor Shoto for life got us to at least 800 words, so imma end it here.
Todoroki: Who said we were on first name basis?
Alex: Me.
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834 words
Bye bye crackheads.
