Their Light

Chapter 28

Hadley

"Again." I threw my fist.

"Again." The other.

"Again!" I yelled out in frustration, banging both of my fists into his chest. Ryder didn't even stumble. He glared at me his palms raised awaiting more strikes.

"What do you want from me?" I asked harshly. I'd been throwing punches for almost an hour and all I'd gotten for feedback was that same damn word over and over again.

"You're not even trying."

His dismissive tone made my resentment flare. Fuck him, I was trying. My t-shirt clung to my body as sweat poured down my face. After Winny left, my self-defense lessons had gone from pleasant workouts to sessions from hell. A part of me wondered if Ryder was doing this on purpose to get me to stop training. I didn't think he would do that, though.

Today's daily lesson was about punching, apparently. Although I knew his intentions were good, and he was only doing this because I asked him to, I had a hard time remembering why I didn't want to kill him sometimes.

The cool evening air was refreshing, but it could only do so much. Thankfully, Caspian had had the insight to buy athletic wear. I had ended up using all of it... a lot. I still wasn't used to the fact that my clothes actually fit and didn't have any holes.

Panting, I pushed the hair out of my face that had fallen out of my ponytail. I wanted these lessons. I had asked for this, but I never realized he would be such a dick throughout each lesson.

"Like hell I'm not!"

He just kept up that stupid glare, but he finally dropped his hands. I could feel Kent and Zeke watching from the porch. The others made themselves scarce. I appreciated not having a huge audience, especially with the way it was going.

"You aren't going to be able to always rely on your powers," Ryder stated.

"I know that!"

"Then why the hell aren't you doing anything?" He raised his voice, taking a step toward me.

For just a moment, I was no longer in the backyard. I was in a dim hallway. Shaking my head, I focused back on the present. Now wasn't the time to get stuck in long forgotten memories. I wanted those memories to stay forgotten.

"I am," I insisted, getting back into my stance.

He raised his hands again, bracing himself. I leapt forward, smashing my fist into his hand and repeating with the other. I moved to strike again, but he dropped his hands.

"Is that the best you've got?"

I knew he was goading me.

I knew he was trying to rile me up.

I knew those things, but it didn't stop the words from jarring me. Faltering, I took a step back as if it had been a punch. I had heard those words before. They echoed around me. I felt my body freeze as my mind was pulled into the past.

________

"Is that the best you've got, sweetheart?"

Another foot made contact with my back. They stood around me, forming a circle, blocking out any hope I had of escaping. You would think that someone would notice, a teacher, anyone. You would be wrong. I had only moved homes a couple of weeks ago, but I already realized this was one of the worst schools I had ever attended. This had become a daily occurrence.

"What, no smart reply for that?"

I learned quickly to bite my tongue. I tried to fight back, talk back, but it was slowly being beaten out of me. Not only was I the new kid, but I was also a foster kid. Therefore, I was an easy target that had nobody to stand up for her. I wasn't strong enough to stand up on my own. Not without losing control. I couldn't lose control, not again.

"What? You don't have anything else to say?"

Curling in on myself, I tried to protect my stomach, but the hits kept getting through. Pain struck like lightning through me. Black spots began appearing in my blurred vision. I was so tired of being weak.

I felt my power bubbling up inside of me. Using all of my will, I pushed it down. I couldn't lose control here. Even with each punch and kick, I couldn't let them ruin everything I had worked for. I would survive this. I would control my powers. Once I was free, I would never be in this situation again.

My promises echoed around my head as the darkness took me.

___________

"Hadley?" Kent's voice brought me back to the present as quick as a flash. My eyes widened, glancing around. Phantom pains shot through me as the memories reverberated in my head.

Ryder was still in front of me, but he wasn't glaring anymore. I couldn't meet his eyes. I glanced over at our audience. Kent was now in the yard, just a few feet from the deck. Concern was coming off of him in waves. I felt the same from Zeke, but he kept his distance. I couldn't meet any of their eyes.

My eyes burned, and I hated it. I hated showing weakness. I hated that my past still had such a powerful hold on my life. It was like a chokehold. I would forget about it and then it would choke me again. It never failed to come back when I least expected it. I hadn't thought about that incident of the several others like it in years. I guessed some scars weren't visible.

"I'm sorry," I choked out, trying and failing to keep my voice steady.

I couldn't even get through a simple self-defense training. Pathetic. I turned and took off running into the trees. They shouted at me, but I ignored it. I just wanted to be by myself. I raced down the path towards the lake, slowing down once I broke through the tree line.

The lake shimmered in the moonlight. It was radiating the peace that I desperately craved at the moment. I held the sobs back, swallowing as I walked down the short pier. Sitting down on the edge, I let feet dangle, my toes just barely scraping the surface of the water.

My pulse pounded from the short sprint and the tidal wave of emotions pulsing through my veins. I pushed them away. Now was not the time to break down. Sitting there, I realized this was the first time I'd been truly alone in a while, though I doubted I actually was. I expected one of them would find me soon enough. I was at war with that thought.

One part of me wanted nothing more than for one of them to comfort me and make me feel better, the other part worried about how dependent and accepting I'd become of everything. I'd only known these guys a short while. Everything just felt like too much. It was overwhelming. That side of me just wanted to enjoy the peace and solitude of being alone, to just forget about everything, even if only for a moment.

The wooden planks beneath me vibrated as footsteps sounded behind me. I sighed, closing my burning eyes. I really didn't want any of them to see me cry. Keeping my powers wrapped up tight, I steadied myself. I didn't want to know what they were feeling. The person paused behind me before moving beside me and taking a seat. Glancing over, my eyes widened at who it was.