Ten Reasons Not to Die

Chapter 12 Day 10

Colby~
Sam got in trouble, He snuck out to the arcade with Kat and Xepher, they didn't even bother to come and ask me if I wanted to.

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Day 10, tonight I will, tonight i will, when everyones having dinner, I'll tell Sam I'm having a shower, tonight, just a few more hours until the monster in me is gone for good, and maybe finally I can be happy.

Maybe the monster will finally be dead, Feel its own pain, And Cry, Hopefully this kills my monster.

~~~

Everyones downstairs, I'm ready, I actually showered so atleast I can smell nice, well i guess the blood will make me look disgusting but I'm killing the monster, the monster that's virus infected me and it won't die till I kill the host, which is me, so I hope this can kill it, I don't know if I can think of any other ways if I die and the monster still lived in me.

I have a knife, a bottle of pills that just might work, But I don't think I'll use them.

I'll sit, I know I'll be woozy and dizzy if I stand that's why.

*Trigger warning

Am I really ready? Am I making the wrong choice?- no I got to do this, it's the only way to kill it. I lower the knife against my already scarred wrist, pushing down slowly and deeper than what my razor can do. There's so much blood, I pushed deep enough to make this much, all of it is going onto the floor but I don't care, the monster is finally dying, i can hear it screaming, or maybe it's my crying. Either way I need to do the other side.

It feels like I'm floating, in the water, almost like that, but the waters cold, and theres lots of waves. . . Wait no I'm drowning I can't swim to the surface, no wait I don't want to do this anymore. . . Please. . . Please I don't want to die anymore I can't watch my life go by above the surface. . . I can't watch Sam smile at me and laugh that goofy laugh he has. . . I can't watch my life like a movie I payed for at a theater.

Sam~
Colby's taking to long, what's he doing?

Dinners over and he's still in there. I'm getting really really hoping he didn't do anything, he's been alone for too long, I need to check on him.

The showers off, It's dead silent, no movement, is he in his room? No I checked there he has to be in there. The door is locked, well yeah I guess he was showering "Colby?" He doesn't reply, now I'm getting worried "Colby!" Its practically a yell "Come on open up Colby!" I push on the door, hoping it opens. Wait why am I pushing I should be making it break open "Colby!" I run into the door trying to break it, please god no don't be doing what I think he's attempting "Colby please!" The door stays put "Colby Fucking Brock Open this door!" I barge into it one more time before it gives up. Theres no air, he is- No this isn't happening, This isn't real- Nope he isn't there hes- hes in his room he's sleeping, he fell asleep- he's yeah he's sleeping I'm sleeping this is a nightmare-

stop lying to yourself he's right there.

Fuck, I'm not even dreaming "Colby! No! Please no! Come back!" He is gone "No! No! No!" I sit by him not caring for the blood stains "Colby! Fuck why?!" I know why I just never helped him. . . Well I tried. . . No I can't just give up on him "No! You come back here right now!" I sit there crying, I stand up crying staggering to the open door, how did no one hear me? "Help! Anybody please! An older student comes, that boy that sat with Colby when he cried "What's the matter?! Is that blood! Are you ok?!" I nod, wiping my tears, more replacing them "Not me! Colby! Call someone please he can't fucking die here!" His face changes from worried to determined, he runs off to a new room getting the counselor we were talking to, he's not gonna help! Argh! He's not even awake to talk! He. . . Can't be dead "Call 911! Go!" He kneels beside him careful with his body "Help him! Come on help him please!" I stand beside him pacing, my hands are shaking "He's still breathing, it's too low, Towels get towels!" I grab the closest towels near me "here!" He wraps it around Colbys arm, Making the blood stop flowing crazily but slowed "Is that even gonna help?!" I pace more, more tears, more yelling, more sadness "I don't know! I can't think right now but I think this is what you do! Stop pacing he's gonna be ok" I laugh, he's lying "You don't need to fucking lie to me, I know he's not ok!" I hear sirens "Finally!" I stand out the door, waiting for them to come "In here!" I yell when they ask where we are, they run, their running fast "In here!" I get pushed aside, I don't see what's happening, the medics are running everywhere. . . All this happened to fast, just this morning we were laughing. . . Was he actually having fun and happy or was he faking that so it seemed like he was ok?

The medics put him on a table like thing. . . A stretcher! He's on a stretcher "Is he ok!?" I say while one of the officers hold me back, I tried to run towards him "Please is he ok!?" When did the officers arrive? "No" just a simple no changed my life forever. . . Colby's Gone.