тнє вσσк σƒ яαη∂σм ѕ*** [long break]

Logically... #3

Summary: Game logic.
Nuff sed.

•=o=O=o=•

   Logic #7:

   Mettaton, although hell-bent on killing you, apparently waits for you to finish cooking instant noodles.

   Instant Noodles in Undertale take some time to cook. And for someone who wants to get ratings fast by "making your last living moments absolutely beautiful", Mettaton has a lot of patience. And for an off-brand food item, nonetheless!

•=o=O=o=•

   Frisk was not having the best week. First, they fell down a hole on top of a mountain. The very one rumored to make people disappear once they trek it. Next, they were almost killed by an evil flower, then saved by a goat woman. Then said goat woman tells them to stay at her home because "it's too dangerous outside", resulting in second-degree burns.

   After that, a tall skeleton, accompanied by a short skeleton (though the latter doesn't do much), forces them to solve rather ridiculous puzzles in the cold air of Snowdin. And after a faux date, they find themselves under the pursuit of an armored fish woman.

   After navigating through the Hotlands under the help a nerdy scientist lizard (whom they met) while being constantly harrased by a "sexy robot", they find themselves at the CORE, the power plant of the entire Underground. And when they were about to exit, they find themselves in one last encounter with the robot. They think that they would be able to avoid fighting him, but...

   "I'll make your last living moments..."

   The fog machine reveals a stunningly attractive android with sleek features. Black shoulder pads, pink boot heels, a humanoid face, synthetic hair; the usually boxy robot was now...

   "...ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL!!!"

   Yep. That's right. Took the words out of my mouth.

   Mettaton starts kicking and punching with his legs, prompting Frisk to move away. He summons a mass of mini-Mettabots, and using their now yellow soul, they start shooting at the army. The bots return fire with a barrage of hearts, and after a while, Frisk is starting to slow down. So they do the one thing that will help them in this situation.

   "...darling. Are those... instant noodles?"

   Frisk pulls out a pot and portable stove from somewhere and starts heating water. The crowd, usually cheering for Mettaton's triumph, are now staring at them in curiosity. Even the music stops for their sake. Mettaton, now gazing towards the child in secondhand embarrasment, grinned nervously.

   "...A-Alright, darling. Just... take your time."

   Frisk smiled in thankfulness. The water was heated for about a minute.

   Two.

   Three.

   Four.

   Finally, the water boils. The child pours the water in an opened cup of uncooked ramen. They pour the water in, cooking the noodles inside. They then eat the noodles, but gagged a bit. They tore open a flavor packet and poured the contents in. They took another bite. It was bearable now, at least.

   Mettaton stared at them weirdly. "...okay... then?"

•=o=O=o=•

   Logic #8:

   Trees cut in Terraria immediately separate into equal parts.

   This is either very convenient or very adverse in real life. Think about it!

•=o=O=o=•

   February 6, 2XXX

   Dear Journal,

     I am currently trapped in an island with no memories of my past with a guy whom I just met. Kyle was his name, I think. He claims to be a guide, but I don't know if I should trust him. He also says that I'm destined for great things, but I dunno about that.

     Anyways, I decided to go along for now. He tell me to cut down the surrounding trees and build a house using them. Apparently, when nighttime comes, zombies and demon eyes come out. So I used the copper axe that, oddly enough, I have woth me.

     The task itself was odd in itself. One might think that cutting trees is a normal rask with no abnormalities whatsoever. However, when I cut my first tree, the entire thing split into pieces! No kidding. When I asked Kyle about it, he just answered with one word.

     Magic.

     Does magic exist in this world? Although, I doo see sentient slimes everywhere, so I guess it does.

     Anyway, I'll have to go. I must finish this up. Thanks for listening.

Your owner,
Reid

•=o=O=o=•

   Logic #9:

   Mortals in Mortal Combat have the same power as deities.

   Oddly enough, this is true. Tell me. Who would win in a fight? Raiden, a literal god of thunder, or Johnny Cage, a superstar with karate moves. You tell me.

•=o=O=o=•

   "Woah, woah, woah. Alright. Who made me fight this guy?"

   Johnny Cage was currently staring a guy with glowing eyes in a white robe and a conical hat. Raiden.

   "What? Do you not think that I can beat you?" The deity frowned. Johnny flinched.

   "N-No, not that..." The movie star scratched his head. "Quite the opposite, actually..." Raiden let out a snicker.

   "You're afraid of me?"

   "I mean... yeah, um, sir," Johnny said, "You're a literal GOD."

   "My status means nothing here," the god answered, "Besides, it's a rule to give up immortality when entering these kinds of fights, isn't it?"

   "Not that!" Johnny shouts, "I mean... you could blast me to bits in seconds!"

   "Is that so? Then I'll go easy on you," Raiden offered. The superstar shakes his head and sighs.

   "Nevermind. Let's get this over with."

•=o=O=o=•

   In another part of the arena, Sonya Blade is sitting with her daughter, Cassandra Cage.

   "...Dad's a wuss."

•=o=O=o=•

   Well, that went well.

   ...Happy February!

   —MrButterFingerz