𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲 | roger taylor

XLVI

May 6, 1978

"You know, I never thought I'd go to another Queen concert," my best friend is saying, as she checks out her appearance in the mirror. "I mean, after what happened with Freddie, and then you... but here we are."

"You're acting as if you don't buy all their records as soon as they're released."

"That has nothing to do with it. And the music is good- it's the least I can do for some old friends," she explains, as if it's completely obvious. Sighing, she turns to me. "How are you feeling?"

"Jo, I'm fucking nervous," I admit, gesturing to the pile of discarded outfits on my bed. "Can you help me please?"

She smiles. "Relax, I've got you. You could show up in a garbage bag and he'd still wanna jump you."

"Stop." I cover my face with my hands, her comment not helping at all to calm my nerves. I should've said no when he offered, made up some excuse, but he practically insisted.

"Just tell me who you want to bring, and it's done," Roger had said over the phone, sounding unusually enthusiastic about it. "Please. I want you to be there."

It isn't so much the attending the show that worries me, rather what comes afterwards, where I'll have to see him for the first time since he left. Questions still remain unanswered, things we haven't even attempted to address over the phone. And now what? Will I have to speak with him after the show, lay it all out on the table tonight? The thought is terrifying and exhausting and will definitely keep me from having fun.

After a few more drinks and several minutes of Josy trying to talk me off a ledge, I'm in a decent outfit and we're ready to go. My stomach is full of jitters, my friend's hand in mine the only thing keeping me on the ground.

From the constant radio play, sales, and magazines- of course I know their fanbase has grown since I used to regularly watch their shows. I just haven't thought about how much, exactly. The amount of people lining up outside the venue is shocking to me, but Josy only grins, pulling me along.

The passes Roger had his assistant drop off turn out to be quite handy. We can go practically anywhere we want, including backstage, which we steer clear of much to my friend's annoyance.

"Wouldn't you rather see them before?" she complains, having to raise her voice over the sounds of the crowd. We're currently making our way through a bustle of people, Josy insisting on getting us a decent view. "It might not be best to have your little heart to heart during the performance high."

"Who says that's happening?" I mutter, but she doesn't hear me.

"This spot looks nice, don't you think?" she hollers, glancing around. She's right- we're towards the front, at a nice angle where practically the entire stage is in view.

I nod in response, the combination of nerves and the people crowding in at all angles making me queasy. Josy notices and thrusts a cold bottle of water in my hands- I sip it gratefully, feeling the tiniest bit better. I let her chatter away, her finally trailing off when the lights start to dim.

The show opens with We Will Rock You, Freddie prancing out onto the stage on his own, the audience joining in with their claps with little encouragement from him. I don't fight it- his energy is so magnetic, I'd forgotten how it is to watch him perform. The rest of the band soon joins him on stage, launching into a faster rendition of the song.

Through the smoke and the colorful lights, I can just make out the blonde behind the drums. He's mostly hidden by the set, but every once in a while I'll catch the side of his face, or hear his prominent backing vocals. Closing my eyes against the swell of music and flashing lights, I feel weightless.