𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲 | roger taylor

IV

 A few weeks had passed since the incident at the bar.

I called it an incident for a number of reasons. One, I had drunk way too much and woken up with a migraine that kept me in bed for most of Saturday. Two, I had most likely made a complete fool of myself and talked too much about personal details that nobody cared about. Three, I had come to some realizations regarding Roger Taylor.

He had only wanted to sleep with me, nothing more.

I had known that. Of course. But I had also hoped that maybe he was interested in me as a person. All night, he listened and responded to my tipsy rambling, with seemingly genuine interest. Obviously, that all must've been for show. Act like you care, act like you're entranced by her, and she'll fall for you. That was his game. It was an awful, dirty game, that I had briefly been a pawn in. I was ashamed, looking back on my few, foggy memories of that night. I had fallen straight into his trap, before managing to come to my senses and get free. Imagine if I hadn't... I would've woken up in bed with him.

"Don't you think you're over analyzing this?" Josy had said to me on the phone the next morning. She had called around noon to unleash fresh gossip on me. Apparently, after I had made my sudden exit from the bar, Roger had stormed over to their table to sit, mumbling profanities. A few hours later, she had seen him leave with some other girl he had found. I had to admit, it hurt a little, but not enough to impact me. Roger had gotten what he wanted in the end. "He seems to like you, Thea."

"He doesn't like me," I had argued. "I'm just another girl to him, out of many."

"Okay, then so what? Have a little fun with him. I don't see any harm in that."

"Of course you don't," I had sighed over the phone. I don't do well with one night stands. I hate them. I always end up getting too attached, and I find it hard to forget whoever I'd been in bed with. I stopped seeking out one night stands a little bit ago, for they were too complicated (on my end) for me to deal with. A bit of flirting didn't hurt, though. "I can't do one time things. They don't work for me."

"Right," Josy said, remembering. "You've always been no fun."

"Compared to you," I retorted. "And I may be overthinking it, but it doesn't matter. I probably won't speak to him ever again."

"You said that last time."

"I did?"

Our conversation eventually faded out, and we hung up, but her words left me thinking. I wished I was more like my best friend. Fun-loving, carefree. I was too serious. I thought too much. I overanalyzed. Even intoxicated Thea was reluctant to have fun.

How was I supposed to let loose when I was drowning in my studies? I was up to my knees in homework, drowning in papers I'd been assigned, and whenever I had a second of free time I'd have my nose in one of my textbooks, trying desperately to memorize what was on the page. I couldn't waste my time concerned about a boy, I had exams to prepare for. And Roger wouldn't want to waste his time over a girl who didn't want him- so we must be on the same page. In my mind, we were even. I slid the topic of Roger Taylor gently from my mind, thinking only about my school work for the time being.

Just because Roger was off limits in my mind, didn't mean that the other band members were. They had taken a liking to Josy and I, and would often invite us to their weekly rehearsals to look on. First it was just Josy going along, because her and Freddie were glued at the hip every second of every day. Freddie mentioned bringing friends along to watch, so they'd have their own little audience. To keep rehearsal exciting, I guess. I'd head over to their rehearsal space as soon as I was out of school, with my books in my backpack. It was quite relaxing to listen to their music as I studied and completed homework.