Love kills Murdoc x Reader

Y/n?

Murdoc POV
I like y/n, fuck. This is new, i've never fallen for someone especially someone who was meant to be a hook up. And only that.

I've tried to ignore them but the more I ignore them the more I want to be with them.

They are different, most hook ups are either because they know me from the band..

that's actually it.

But y/n actually wanted to know me and spend time with me.

I don't think i've ever been in a relationship before.

Am I even ready for one?
Does y/n even like me?

My anxiety started to kick in, "Shit, let me calm down." I took a deep breath

"What if I called y/n-"

SERIOUSLY??

They're the reason i'm freaking out. I hate new feelings especially when I can't just ignore them.

"Shit shit."

I was starting to shake a bit so I went to drink this feeling away.

"Murdoc ya okay?" 2D asked a bit worried

"Yeah yeah, leave me alone fucker."

After a few drinks

"You're telling meh, this fucking whiskey didn't work?" I threw the bottle even after all that I'm still thinking of y/n.

My phone started to buzz

"Y/n?"

"No it's me Sarah, how about you and I hang out tonight.."

"uh n—sure come over."

"If this doesn't do the trick I don't know what will." I groaned

"You're so sexy Murdoc." (not me getting second hang embarrassment from this, forgive me plzzz)

"y/n."

"Who?"

I heard my door open, I thought it was 2D but it was y/n...

"Fuck."

"WAIT Y/N!" I pushed Emily? Off me, I'm so stupid whenever something good comes into my life I always mess it up.

I rushed down the stairs.

2D grabbed my arm

"I fucked up didnt I?"

He didn't respond but I didn't need him to anyways.

"Get the fuck out Emily."

"My name isn't Emily you dick!" She cried

"Fuck." I threw myself onto my bed feeling hopeless

I really messed up my chances, I want to be with them, but now after this, after what I did. Would they even want to see my face?

NOW BACK TO THE PRESENT

I opened the door and saw y/n, It was surprising, I didn't know what to say or do. Its been a while since i've seen them.

"Hey." I said

"Hi."

They didn't seem upset with me, the opposite actually they looked happy to see me.

I don't care though I've missed them, so much.

"Come in, it's cold out there."

"Hey you know.." They cut me off by grabbing me by my collar and kissing me.

Honestly after what had happened I didn't think they'd want to see me but now their kissing me?

"Wait aren't you mad?" I asked them

"Shut up."

I smiled and we went upstairs.