Recluse Protection

Chapter 37

I'm too tired to argue. He drives us to his complex, managing to find me a coat to hide me from eyes as he walks me to his apartment. I'm so numb. I haven't been able to get this wretched smell out of my system. I want it gone. Following him blindly as he unlocks the apartment door and pushes me towards the bathroom. "Take a shower, it'll make you feel better Casey." He sighs, turning before I can object. A shower will help. Without more instruction I strip, glad to be out of those clothes as I step in turning on the shower. I just need to be washed.

My mind can't be bothered to process anything while I'm showering, I just feel numb. My hand blindly grabs a bottle of soap, washing everything. Just get clean. The hot water burns the feeling of everything from my skin. Scrub it off, it'll be fine. The thought brings me back to the past, after every night, they'd let me shower. Scrub it off, it'll be fine. It'll go away. Closing my eyes, my heels dig into my eyes as I struggle to focus, to breath. Anything to not remember. My arms hang down, feeling like lead.

I stare at the wall, numb to my surroundings, to everything really; I stand still for minutes before swallowing harshly and shutting off the water to grab a towel and dry off. The clothes picked up and a shirt and boxers sat on the counter. I didn't hear him come in. I stare at the shirt for a moment before pulling it on, I doubt the boxers even have a chance of fitting. With the towel in hand I dry my hair, running it over the strands. "Feel better?" His voice makes me glance at him, turning to focus on his form in the kitchen by the sink, holding a glass of water.

"Cleaner." I grunt as I stare at him, his eyes scanning my face before moving to my form making me shiver under the weight of his gaze. I hate feeling vulnerable, like I'm weak and pathetic. Nothing but a whore. I turn away, not caring to watch the observation. Moving to the couch I sit down, drying my hair for the activity. Distractions make it easier.

"We need to talk." Cobra grunts and I glance at him briefly.

"So get on with it Cobra, I'd like to go back to the hotel I need-" Cobra cuts me off with a grunt.

"You think I'm letting you go anywhere tonight?" I stare at him and roll my eyes.

"Cobra, I'm not in the mood to be dealing with any of this tonight. Spit out what you have to say." I shake my head at him, drawing my legs to my chest as I dry my hair, keeping busy. Just stay busy until next night... maybe they'll use someone else. Reminders of my past move to infiltrate my thoughts, blurring the lines painfully as I'm faced with more memories. It's who I am... an entertainer, a bitch.

"Too fucking bad Casey, you're going to listen to what I have to say. I don't give a damn anymore." I can only glare at him weekly.

"Cobra, what do you want from me!? You're going to say the same shit, that I'm not healthy or I can't fucking handle this shit! Well news flash it's a little too fucking late!" I growl at him as I jerk my head to face him, my heart races, slamming into my chest as I glare at his approaching form.

"Casey, shut up." He remarks making me arch a brow at him and narrow my eyes at him. I don't need shit from you. "Why can't you accept that I want to help you. I want to protect you." I shake my head at him as I watch him drop down onto the couch.

"Cobra, no, I - you don't need to be involved." I finish off lamely as I shake my head, refusing the option immediately. No more minds need to be tainted.

"Casey, what the hell are you saying? Don't you understand I'm already involved? Casey what the hell do you think I do? I don't just stand around all day." He grunts and I shake my head at him.