29. Confidence

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Chapter Twenty Nine

You kicked open the door, holding tightly to Changkyun's arm that was wrapped around your neck as you dragged him in, slipping your shoes off and not even bothering to try and tell him to take his.
Maybe you should've watched him more closely during the after proposal party.
You were too busy talking to June, your sister, and both Shownu and June's mother's. They were very kind, and June looked a lot like her mother, it genuinely surprised you to how young her mother looked.
The two of you had stayed after with the rest of the guys, minus Shownu, of course to clean up, and it was safe to say that they may or may not have cleaned up the cocktails they'd made prior in a different way.
Changkyun mumbled incoherent words as you pushed him onto his bed, looking completely dazed. You finally took a deep breath, panting softly from how heavy he was. You hoped you'd never had to do that again. You slipped your cropped jacket off, throwing it onto the ground because you knew that you'd pick it up later. When you looked back up to Changkyun, he was being his average self, as if he wasn't just struggling on his own feet for the last twenty minutes.
"Thanks." Changkyun said normally, standing up just fine before heading towards his kitchen. He took his shoes off beside the front door and opened the fridge door. Your jaw hung open watching while you followed close behind him, wondering what wizardry had just been used to suddenly make him okay.
Yer a wizard, Danny.
Changkyun turned around to you, taking a good look at your confused expression. He curiously offered you the glass of juice that he had poured out for himself, wondering if that's what you wanted. You shook your head, still trying to wrap your head around it.
You swore he was completely wasted a few minutes ago.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" He asked, a hint of annoyance in his tone. He adjusted his glasses, but ended up taking them off and clipping them to his vest. You pointed to the door, and then to his bedroom, and then to him. He laughed at you, shaking his head at you while he messed up your hair with his hand.
"I wanted an excuse for you to hold me. You should know that I don't get drunk that easily." He shrugged casually,
"A little acting never hurt anyone." He grinned, very satisfied with the trick he was able to play. And you actually believed it.
"It hurt me." You whined, ramming your head into the wall out of frustration. Changkyun pulled you back from the wall by the strap of your dress, not touching your bare shoulders. You snorted, making him furrow his eyebrows at you.
You couldn't believe he noticed things like that.
He reached out for his orange juice that he'd placed down on the island but retracted his hand, almost as if he was having a mini crisis over his juice.
"Okay, now that I know you're okay, I'm heading home."
Changkyun snapped back towards you, shaking his head.
"Stay here. It's late."
"I literally live downstairs. There's no point in me having my own apartment if you want me to stay here every time you see me." You sighed, crossing your arms and waiting for him to give you a good reason to not leave and pass out on your bed.
Your own bed.
"It's 2 AM." He mumbled.
"Do you want me to sleep in this dress?"
"My closet is always available to you and you know that."
"What about Ollie?"
"I left him food and water before we left, he'll be fine. It's one night."
"What if I want to leave?"
"You don't. I know you don't."
"I do though."
"You could get kidnapped if you left now and no one would notice until the morning."
Your eyes widened, his words sent your entire body into fight or flight mode. You were fully aware that he was joking, but today really freaked you out, and it shouldn't.
It was a coincidence.
You grabbed onto your hands, holding them behind your back once you felt them beginning to tremble. Though, you should know better. You'd never be able to hide those from Changkyun. He was always watching you like a hawk. You felt his gaze on you soften from the serious one he had just a few seconds earlier.
"Hey, I was kidding." He assured gently, taking your hands and squeezing them tightly in his before leading you into his bedroom.
Darn it. He was going to ask you why you got so frightened for no reason. You just didn't want to make him worried.
"Talk to me. Somethings up. You've been off since you got back with June. Don't think I didn't notice." He pulled you down so you were sitting beside him at the edge of the bed. The only thing was that his feet were touching the ground and yours weren't, which made him chuckle softly.
Curse his very tall bed.
"It's nothing. I'm just tired." You lied, making a valiant attempt at pulling your hand from his grasp but it would not budge a single bit. He cocked an eyebrow at you, his grip tightening on your hands.
"Don't lie to me. You should know that you can't get away with it."
You tried.
It did not work but at least you tried.
"Must all of our conversations be depressing?" You complained, kicking your feet around like a child that didn't get their ice cream cone.
"What's on your mind?"
"I swear it's nothing. It's just- your phone is ringing." You pointed to his suit pocket that was lighting up. Changkyun groaned, lazily pulling it out but his eyes widened as soon as he looked at it. He cleared his throat, and pressed the answer button, timidly holding the phone up to his ear. He put on a smile and a very fake sounding high voice as he responded to the person,
"Hello, mother in law."
You choked on air.
"Is that my mom?"
Changkyun rapidly put a finger to his lips, shushing you in hopes that your mother wouldn't hear you but he was too late. You heard the surprised exclaim from the phone and Changkyun huffed before putting the phone in speaker. You scooched closer to him, your bare arms touching the strangely rough material of his linen shirt.
"What are you two young people doing at 2 in the morning?" Your mother teased, and you could literally feel that signature smirk of hers.
The both of you stayed silent, staring at each other, hoping that your mother wouldn't say anything else.
She did.
"Did I disturb something? Were you in the middle of doing a little something something?"
"Mom!" You shrieked, covering Changkyun's ears in horror, making him chuckle as he removed your hands.
"I'm not a child, Eggo."
"But you certainly should have one"
"Mom! Stop it!"
Your cheeks were flushed red as you hid your face in Changkyun's chest, leaning your entire self onto him. He lifted his hands, trying his best not to touch your exposed skin. You laughed tenderly at his flustered self as he seemingly tried to dodge every part of you without pushing you away.
It was honestly sweet of him.
You took his hand that was still held over your head and placed it beside the thin strap of your dress and on the arm he was trying so hard to avoid.
"You can touch me, you know? I'm not a disease. Also your hands are always warm and I'm cold."
It took Changkyun a second to understand what you'd said before he responded,
"I just don't want to make you uncomfortable. You haven't had the best experiences in the past. Plus, it's a lot of skin." He gestured towards the top part of your green dress which you did agree was a lot more skin than you were used to showing but you didn't seem to care as much as you might've a few years ago.
"I don't mind. If anything I'm comfortable around you."
He smiled sweetly at you, taking his hand off your shoulder and wrapping both his arms around your waist, pulling you back so you both fell onto the bed side by side. You both laughed at each other, finding it funny that his tie basically slapped his face as he fell back.
"I do hope you know I'm still here and listening to that conversation only proved my point further."
Both of you looked to Changkyun's phone that was where the two of you were just sitting. You extended your arms, grabbing the phone and sighing.
"Don't worry, mother in law. We're just having a bit of fun."
You slapped Changkyun's shoulder.
"Do you have to call her mother in law?"
"She makes me." He whispered into your ear, looking to the phone, hoping not to hear a response from your mother in case she heard. Thankfully, she didn't say anything related.
"What kind of fun, son in law?" She said again, cackling with satisfaction.
You sweared to god, you didn't know why your own mother was like this.
You clicked the FaceTime button, holding the phone above the both of your faces as soon as your mom showed up on the screen. She broke out into a smile as soon as she saw you both.
"So, you both are in bed, huh?" She pointed out, wiggling her eyebrows playfully. You sighed, slapping your free hand over your forehead as you gave your mother an unimpressed look.
"Mom, why are you awake and two in the morning and why did you feel the need to call Changkyun?" You asked your mother, who looked rather alive for such an unreasonable hour of the day.
"Why do you both look like you walked a red carpet? Late night date? No, wait. It was your shy friend's proposal." She finally put two and two together and you genuinely wanted to know why she knew of that because you were certain you hadn't mentioned it to her recently. Changkyun slipped off his vest, throwing it to the side, making you glare at him.
He better pick that up later.
"I wanted to call Changkyun to thank him for the presents he left when he came over for lunch last week."
Your eyes widened and then immediately narrowed as you looked to an insanely panicked Changkyun.
He was busy all of last week.
You hadn't even seen him for a single day.
"You said you were at work every day." You crossed your one arm, turning away from him. You heard him whine for a split second, making you scoff.
"I had a few spare hours one of those days-"
"And you spent it with my mother? I'm offended." You joked, but obviously very believably because Changkyun seemed to be falling for your fake anger. Oh, how you loved your job.
He hummed quietly, taking the phone from your hand before snuggling his face into the crook of your neck.
"Is Princess Eggo mad because Prince Danny ditched her for her mom?" He joked in his best baby voice, completely ignoring the fact that your own mother was watching all of this play out right in front of her very eyes.
"Are you mad because you wanted my attention? Was one week without seeing my handsome face that excruciating?"
"It was peaceful."
Your mother's gentle laugh caught both of your attention, so you finally turned back around so you and Changkyun were shoulder to shoulder and looked up at the phone that he was still holding in his outstretched arm.
How was he not getting tired? Or dropping the phone flat on his face.
Nice to know you have your own human selfie stick.
"You both act exactly the way your father and I used to when we were young." She admired the two of you from the phone screen, seeing you both so close together and having fun with each other.
"We used to escape our college dorm rooms through the windows and go out in the middle of the night just to get ice cream." She recalled, and you watched that dreamy look in her eyes that she had whenever she'd start talking about your father.
From what you could remember, they were each other's world.
If your relationship could even be half of what theirs were, you'd be more than grateful.
"I'll leave you both alone now." She said solemnly, obvious the thought of your father clouding her mind. You could tell. You knew your mother rather well. You'd grown closer than before after your father's passing.
The death anniversary would be in a few weeks.
"Bye kids. Don't do anything weird."
"What happened to wanting grandki-"
She ended the call before you could finish.
Changkyun's arm dropped, exhaling tiredly as the phone dropped to the other side of him. He laughed quietly as soon as the both of you made eye contact.
"You look pretty in that dress." He grinned, moving his head so it was resting beside your shoulder. You tried to act annoyed but his hair was tickling your skin so you couldn't help but giggle.
"You've told me that like six times already." You rolled your eyes at him, flicking his forehead gently to get him out of the trance he was in.
"Are you going to tell me what happened?" Changkyun finally asked again, his smile slowly fading before he finally sat himself up, pulling you up with him. You groaned, wanting to lie down and maybe pass out on his bed and not care about it until the morning but with him clinging onto you like a goddamn leech, you doubt that would be happening.
"It's nothing really, Kyun. I'm just being a bit over paranoid." You assured, taking the glasses that he'd clipped onto his shirt and putting them down on the bedside table so that he wouldn't completely break them. Changkyun sighed at you, leaning his head back on the headboard of his bed before beginning to play with your fingers,
"I don't trust you, but I trust you'll tell me later." He looked at you, making the sentence seem as if it were a question. You nodded instinctively, letting him shift himself so he could rest his head on your shoulder and clutch onto your arm like a sloth, his eyes fluttering close.
You didn't know why but you were just going to go with it.
His breath tickled your exposed arms, sending shivers down your spine. You simply ignored the sensation.
"I have a question."
Changkyun hummed in response, encouraging you to speak,
"Do you have any pictures of yourself when you were little?"
Changkyun shook his head,
"My mother didn't take pictures of me. Maybe she did, I'm not sure. We'll never find out though. Why do you ask?"
You rested your head atop his for a second, brushing your hands through his hair, the hair spray you'd put on in the afternoon had completely failed him. At least it lasted when it really needed to.
"I don't know. I feel like you know a lot about me when I was younger, I just wanted to know a bit more about you."
Changkyun's eyes opened. He looked up at you, the hint of guilt in his gaze was evident. It made you feel bad for bringing it up. You probably shouldn't bring things up like this with no reason or no preparation.
"If it helps, Eggo, I don't really have a clear memory of my life before I was six, and those few memories are slowly fading." He stayed silent after saying that, his arms traveling down to your waist so he could hug you like you were a giant teddy bear.
Maybe he was a little drunk.
"Can I ask you a completely random question that also has an obvious answer?" He asked innocently but you could tell that he was making fun of you. You knew his past. Not a lot of it, but more than your average person.
"Do you have a tattoo?"
"Yeah."
Changkyun choked on air furiously.
Bet he wasn't expecting that. The answer wasn't that obvious, was it, Danny Boy? He was still coughing, a hand gently massaging his throat while he lifted himself from your shoulder, his eyes widened in fascination and in confusion.
"Where?" He exclaimed, checking your arms thoroughly to no avail.
It wasn't there.
"You're kidding with me. Not my sweet baby. You're too innocent." He messed up your hair, running his fingers gently through it while he laughed with disappointment.
"I have two."
"Don't lie to me."
You grinned cheekily, turning your back towards him before parting your hair down the center, showing him the back of your neck which was decorated with six small black and white butterflies. You heard Changkyun's "ooh" as he slowly trailed his finger around the small tattoos.
"You weren't joking." He breathed out in awe, feeling the shivers down your spine as his finger curiously traced each and every wing of each butterfly, every small line and detail.
"How have I never noticed?" He asked quietly. You turned around, scoffing slightly at his awestruck expression.
"I got them the week after I left the company. The butterflies symbolize freedom and a period of transformation. There's six of them for every year I was there." You explained, smiling as he nodded at each word you were saying, seeming very invested.
"Then I have a black koi fish and lotus right about... here." You placed a hand on the left side of your waist, inching your fingers along the side of it, though it wasn't that large.
It sure did hurt to get.
"Babe, that's hot." He threw his head back, breathing out with a smirk. You slapped his arm, pushing him back, him falling back onto the bed while you hid your face in embarrassment.
"Don't call me that!" You whined, feeling your cheeks heat up from his comment. Changkyun cackled in amusement, getting up from lying down beside you. He lifted you up lightly, you panicked at his sudden action, throwing your hands around his neck in hopes that he wouldn't drop you despite the fact that he simply just lifted you onto him. He rested his hand at the small of your back and playfully taunted you by leaning his forehead onto yours.
"You're so goddamn hot, babe."
"Stop it!" You cried, placing your hand over his sly smirk and trying to separate you both, but Changkyun's grip was too tight around you.
You should really join him at the gym.
You wanted to be strong enough to pull yourself away from him at least. Getting trapped in his grasp was getting pretty annoying.
"You're so cute when you're flustered."
"I'm not flustered."
"Yes, you are. Look."
He cupped your cheeks, laughing at you rather loudly while you pouted at him who was annoyingly staring at you,
"Your cheeks are bright red."
"Yours were redder this afternoon." You defended yourself, remembering how completely out of it he was earlier.
Now that was cute. 
You gave up trying to escape. He was holding onto you like a koala with a tree brace.
"Personally, I think you should use that confidence now. We are in a rather strange position." He chuckled, gesturing at the two of you. Your knees were on either sides of his thighs while your arms were wrapped tightly around his neck, his own snaked around your waist.
You were practically on him.
And neither of you did anything about it.
"Why aren't you freaking out?" Changkyun scoffed, and the corners of your lips turned up slightly as soon as you saw the red hue that was beginning to form around his cheekbones every time he made eye contact with you.
Should you take advantage of this situation? Probably.
If there was one thing your extroverted, newly engaged friend taught you today while you were speaking alone with your mocktails, it was to flirt like your life depended on it.
Apparently, June was the flirty type. You saw it so clearly but it's also impossible to imagine.
Like look at her, she's adorable.
Apparently, it worked like a charm at making them flustered.
Time to channel your inner Confidence.
"You'd normally pushing yourself away from me and then you'd get all ner- woah there."
You carefully looped your fingers around his tie, undoing it slowly. Changkyun flicked your chin up with his index finger, looking at you wide eyed as he awkwardly chuckled.
"What are you doing, Eggo?" He eyed you, his confused smile still managed to show a glint of amusement. He ran a hand through his hair, avoiding meeting your eyes while trying his best to calm himself internally.
You could read him like a book too.
"You said you wanted confidence, right?" You simply explained, casually throwing his tie to the ground, watching his eyes follow it as it hit the floor with a gulp. Your fingers walked themselves up his chest, leaning your entire body against his.
"I'm giving you confidence."
You swiftly unbuttoned the first button of his perfectly white shirt. He stopped your hands, holding them right at his neck while he spoke, turning his head towards the closed curtains and keeping them there in spite of embarrassment.
"You're being too hot right now, Y/N. I don't think you understand what you're doing." He laughed, panic laced through each and every word he uttered. You could see the beads of sweat that were beginning to form at his forehead, making you grin with satisfaction.
It was working.
Y/N: 1    Changkyun: 0
You held his face in one hand, turning his head so he was looking at you. His grip around you loosened for a split second, as if your gaze had weakened him. You winked, making his eyes widen. You could feel his heart race just by leaning against him, his heartbeat getting faster with every new move you made.
"Y/N." He gasped before you placed a finger over his lips, getting dangerously close to him.
"I know exactly what I'm doing." You smirked with satisfaction, watching the shock hit him as soon as he realized that you'd unbuttoned the next two buttons of his shirt while you spoke.
You found the fact that you were able to do that rather impressive. You could barely button up your own shirts half of the time.
You wrapped a strand of his black hair around your finger, playing with it slowly, letting the panicked anticipation in Changkyun build up until he'd have enough to explode.
"You're cute when you're flustered, you know?" You teased, booping the tip of his nose. Changkyun tried buttoning his shirt back up surprisingly. He'd always joked about his "crazily ripped body" yet as soon as you put on this confident facade, he gets all timid. You pushed his hands off, pinning them at either sides of his head, giggling as soon as his eyes fluttered close, patiently awaiting for something that wasn't going to happen, his cheeks as red as the roses you were surrounded by a few hours ago.
June was right.
This worked like a charm.
You let go of his hands, climbed off of him and fixed your dress. His eyes opened, watching you curiously as you slid off the bed. He grabbed your wrist, spinning you around before you could leave his room.
"Where are you going?"
"Home. I'll get kidnapped on the way." You joked, despite the fact that you were still very much terrified since that was very much a possibility.
He raised an eyebrow, standing up rather than sitting next to you.
Oh, it was so much more intimidating now that he was towering over you again.
He wasn't even that much taller.
"And all of that was?" He pointed to the bed, then to his tie that was still on the ground, than to his rather unbuttoned shirt which you covered with your hands because you'd rather not see that. Even though you kinda did it.
"Revenge." You shrugged, beginning to leave again. You didn't get far before you were pulled back harshly, your cheek hitting the skin of his chest. He placed his hands on your shoulders, bending down slightly so that he could meet you eye to eye, his expression completely unamused. You gave him a cute smile, hoping he'd let it go because you were kind of terrified by the glare that he was sending right at you.
"Do you know who I am?"
"Changkyun?" You trailed off, getting nervous but in the fear sort of way. Changkyun nodded, picking you up and throwing you back onto the bed.
Literally.
There was something mentally wrong somewhere in that head of his.
He hovered over you the same way you did not too long ago and leaned in.
"And no one tries to take revenge on Changkyun."
You put a hand over your lips, which made him break out into laughter. You let out a breath of relief as soon as he lifted himself off of you. Being trapped underneath him was suffocating in a whole different way. He sat up, holding his arms out to you and grinning sweetly, which was very unlike those few seconds of confidence he had.
"If you wanted to make me flustered, you could've just given me a hug."
He held out his open arms are for you and you got up, throwing yourself into his embrace with no hesitation.
"I like this way better." You smiled into the fabric that was somehow still clinging into his body. Changkyun shrugged and you could feel that sly grin on his face as he responded,
"I don't know. I kind of enjoyed what we were going for before." He pulled you away from for just a second, just so he could say one more thing,
"Wear this dress more often."

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p a i n

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