Swords (Edmund X Reader)

Trapped

Here I was...once again...in Tom Riddle's clutches. I wanted to stay at Hogwarts. I wanted nothing more to do with Tom. I wanted to convince Edmund and perhaps even Tewkesbury to renounce their old ways. To join our side.

But the way Newt had looked at me. The pure disbelief in his eyes. The same reflected in Harry's and Hermione's and Ron's. They had trusted me, and I had betrayed them. I deserved every bit of hate that they threw my way.

Perhaps it was that guilt that allowed me to escape that day. The reason I had let Edmund drag me away the other day. I couldn't bear to see my friends and family look at me like. But then again, I was a coward. I should have stayed there and faced the consequences. I was a coward to run away.

I am nothing but a disappointment.

My friends hate me for betraying them. I broke the trust of one of my only remaining family members. On the other hand, I had failed to kill Dumbledore, something I'm sure Tom wouldn't forget easily.

I wanted to leave from here so bad.

But where would I go?

I had been here for weeks now. Trapped in the same bedroom as before. My doors were always locked as if I would try to escape. As if I would be welcomed back. Edmund visited me every day. He stayed in my room for hours on end. I was grateful for his unwavering support, but I couldn't help but think...

This was partially his fault.

I still don't know why he followed Tom so closely, hung on his every word. Edmund could easily have stayed at Hogwarts, pleaded for his case, and been protected. Then again, how protected is Hogwarts without Dumbledore?

Snape had killed Dumbledore. That was something I couldn't wrap my mind around. Why? I was convinced Snape was good at playing double agent, but that was a little too good. I didn't trust him either anymore. I didn't really trust anyone, I guess.

Not even me anymore.

----

I was rummaging through my trunk this morning. I had nothing better to do as my days were usually filled with boredom. Edmund was sitting by the window, telling me the latest news.

"Snape's going to be headmaster now." He said.

"What?! I thought it would be McGonagall." I replied. He shrugged.

"Hogwarts' new staff will consist of death eaters. But they can't do anything about it." He mumbled.

"I hope the children will be okay." I said. Imagine the first years that started term there. They were looking for a magical beginning and instead their lives were probably filled with terror. "Who would send their kids to Hogwarts anymore?" I asked. If I had kids, I'd much rather keep them safe at home.

"Well, there's got to be some that would want to go. And honestly, the school still has noble teachers, they'd protect the kids well." Edmund said.

"Hmm." I replied, getting busy in organizing my things. I found the necklace that Edmund had given me on that Christmas ages ago. I put it on again for a feeling of nostalgia. I took out a pouch filled with galleons. I was about to put it away when I had a random urge to spill its contents and count the coins.

I did so and the coins came tumbling out. I sifted through them, counting the money. That's when I saw a peculiar looking galleon. I smiled, recognizing it as the one that Hermione made for Dumbledore's army.

The date on it was July 28th. I tossed it aside. Wait. July? The last meeting was during school ages ago. I picked it up again and rubbed the surface. No it definitely said July. I turned it over and gasped.

"What happened?" Edmund looked over.

"Uh, oh-uh nothing, I just found the sketches Tewkesbury made of me." I picked up the sketchbook really quick. I quickly slipped the coin in my pocket. Edmund made his way over to me; I'd have to examine the coin closer later on.

Edmund took a seat beside me and looked through the pages with me.

"Ah look this is the one of you in the library." He smiled, his finger tracing the ink on the page. "I loved the way your eyes would be so focused and determined as your hair would fall like a curtain on either side of you." He smiled.

"I got to admit, Tewkesbury was definitely in love with you then."

"How is he now?" I asked. I hadn't seen Tewkesbury in a while. 

"Same boat as I am, but he understands you two weren't meant to be. Maybe it was right people wrong time... He still thinks of you as a close friend, Y/N." He said, not taking his eyes off the page.

"I still think of him as a close friend too, I just...wish I could tell him more often." I replied.

He flipped the page. This was a picture of us in the Quidditch Pitch in our third year. We were smiling as I held the new Firebolt, and Edmund pointed to it proudly. "We looked so happy." I muttered. Our eyes shone brightly, and our smiled were genuine. This brought tears to my eyes.

"We were kids." Edmund said softly.

"We are kids. Kids in the middle of a war." I muttered. I felt Edmund put an arm around me.

"We'll get through it." I said.

"But how Ed. I-I'm sorry but I don't feel safe here. I don't feel okay with this. I can't see how you're so calm. We're in fricking Voldemort's house. I wonder why he hasn't killed me yet, I'm sure he's got something planned that's worst. And you sit by me idly as if nothing's going on." I said.

Edmund looked down at the floor. "Look, I've made choices, some bad some good. But joining Voldemort has got to be the worst so far. And right now, it may look like I'm calm and composed but Y/N, I'm really not. I'm trying to find a way out, I promise. But I'd say right now, our best bet is to stay here."

"And wait things out? No Ed, our best bet is to get out there and fight. Stop Voldemort." I argued back. Edmund sighed, getting up.

"You don't understand Y/N-"

"-Ed I've been a coward. I ran away when I needed to come clean. And that's eating me out inside. My friends and family all think I've betrayed them. And I can't live with that guilt. I'd rather die-"

"-Don't say that, I can't see you die-"

"-I will die protecting them and maybe once I'm dead they'll forgive me." I muttered quietly.

Edmund ran a hand through his hair and walked over to the door. "You don't understand Y/N, I'm not going to let you die. If you die, I die. Remember that stupid nickname you gave Tewkesbury?" He paused. "I think it better fits our situation now...

I'll always be your Romeo."

---

As I tucked in for bed that night, I finally pulled out the coin. The date hadn't changed, it was still today's date. I turned it around to read the message.

Bill and Fleur's Wedding 1st of AugustThen we'll be off to find HorcruxesThe BurrowCome back