What's In Your Mind? (Krii7y) ✔️

Chapter 41

(Jaren's pov)

Fucking unbelievable.

I can't wrap my head around the whole thing just yet. I can't believe it. I expected anyone, literally anyone but John.

Can I forgive him? I really don't know to be honest, my mind is at war, trying to pick a side, it gives me a headache.

I loved John, still do, but now knowing what I know, I'm not completely sure if I can even look at him anymore without wanting to snap his neck.

I feel so many things right now, my mind is a train wreck. Betrayed, frustrated, angry, mortified, it's all there displayed front and center, I imagine all those feelings as a bundle with a big red bow and a tag that says 'have fun ;)'.

Part of me wants to run to John, to go to him for comfort, but the other half wants him to fuck off.

Everything is just so loud.

There's a knock at my door, "Jaren, can I come in?"

It's my mother, my real mom, "Go ahead."

She opens the door and walks in, immediately concerned, "Jaren honey are you alright? You look like you've been crying. I know that this is all very sudden, and that you're gonna miss it here, but it's for the better, I promise things will be better for you in Colorado."

She thinks that I was crying because I wanna leave. It's funny because now it's the complete opposite, I just want to get away, as soon as possible, as far away from John as I can be.

"Jaren?" My mom pulled me back to reality.

"Yea I'm fine, just came across some old journals and looking through them made me emotional." I smile at her, trying to be reassuring.

My mom is actually pretty amazing so far. When she talked to me alone, she immediately tried to get to know about me, asking me simple questions and such. She genuinely wants to get to know me, wants to make up for all the time we couldn't spend together. I'm glad I'm going with her.

"Ok honey. Remember, have all your stuff packed and say goodbye to all your friends by tomorrow afternoon, we leave at sundown." She gives me a quick hug before leaving my room, closing the door behind her.

I'm already done packing, so I might as well start saying my goodbyes- oh shit I just realized, I'm going to have to say bye to Eric. He's not going to take this very well.

Me: hey I'm coming over in a few, have some tissues ready, I have some news you probably won't like too much

HelmetHead: oml did you swallow another bad banana

Me: no dumbass this is serious, I'll be there in five

This will suck, this will suck a whole lot.

I grab my keys and get going to ruin my best friend's day. On the way I try to keep my mind off John. Should I tell Eric about what he said? Definitely not. Knowing him, he'd probably make John's life a living hell after finding out.

When I get to Eric's, I let myself in and he's sitting on the couch.

"Hey man, want some weed." I could never convince him that I don't smoke, but he always tried, I'm going to miss this.

"No, a glass of water would be fine though." I tell him before plopping down on the couch next to him.

"No can do, I have weed in front of me, but water is over there," he points to the kitchen to his right, "weed is more accessible at the moment, so I would pick weed if I were you."

I sigh, "Y'know what, I'm not that thirsty anymore."

Eric chuckles, "Well what news do you have for me? You getting a bigger dick or something?"

"Nope this is bigger."

"Bigger than a new dick? I've gotta hear this."

This is the part where I absolutely crush him, here I go, "Eric I'm moving to Colorado with my real mom, and I leave tomorrow."

He's shocked at first, then frowns. "You cant be serious man."

"I know, and I'm sorry, I just need a fresh start, and I don't really have a choice, plus my real mom is rich or something."

He looks at me, trying to find good in the situation, "Colorado may bring you more happiness, but you know what's not there? Me. You can't leave me man, you're like my brother."

He's right, I know he is, and I can't argue, "I'm sorry, I promise I'll try to visit every once and a while."

"You better."

We both stand up and Eric pulls me into a long hug.

"I'm gonna miss you." I say.

He smiles, "Who wouldn't."

I chuckle, "You have a point."

After a few more minutes, I make my way back home. A few tears fall as I think of how much I'll be leaving behind here, even under all the bad, there's some really good memories I have, and some really good friends.

When I get home I open my phone to the groupchat, all my friends are in it. It's time to tell everyone else what's happening. I start typing.

"Hey guys just thought I'd let you all know I'm moving to Colorado, I know it's sudden but it's what's best for me at the moment, I promise I'm come to visit every once and while, I'll miss you all and shit like that. Well that's all, just wanted to say bye."

I send it and immediately the once inactive chat became very active, the chat started moving.

Basically bish: damn that sucks

Scooter: das tough man

AngryIrishMan: shi I'll miss you

Shiterizor: that's gay

AngryIrishMan: ur gay

Shiterizor: am not

MamaMoo: I feel so betrayed

Shiterizor: oh fook

I smile as I watch the chat move, the group has had its rough points but at the end of the day, they'll always be there. God I'm going to miss this too.

I feel empty, like after tomorrow I won't exist because I won't be here anymore. My thoughts make me drowsy as I slowly drift off to sleep.

A/N- oi oi oi guyssss. This is the longest chapter I've written in a while, sudden motivation is cool. This story is so so close to being done if I were to estimate, I'd say maybe 2 or 3 more chapters and I'll be done. I really wanna say thank you for those of you who've read this, I started this story so so long ago and I'm surprised people are still reading. But anyways, thank you all for reading, vote If you feel like it. Byeeeeeee.