LAW OF ATTRACTION (Author's Reco)

ROOM IN HER EYES

JENNIE

The last time I checked, I am straight.

I'm a bit conscious now walking at the mall with Lisa. We were asked by my parents to buy some groceries and other stuff for the house. Our helper took her day off today and no one's going to do it as Mom and Dad will be traveling out of town today.
Lisa can't say no to my Dad whenever he asked her to come over.

We both can't deny that as we stroll around, our skins want to feel each other. Like when my arm unintentionally rubs against hers, I feel alive. I mean, I can feel some warmth on my belly and it spreads all over my body.
And my heart beats fast.

I am trying to ignore it.

I can sense that Lisa tries her best to deny it too.

But the earth is tricking us. We ended up holding each other's hand while walking at the grocery.

I didn't let go. I am trying to keep this pleasure and excitement that I feel like we're being a couple now.

Until...

"Gross. It's so damn gross! Two woman in a relationship? I am sure they are sinners."
A lady our age told his boyfriend and talked to us more.

Lisa just smirked and shook her head.
But me, I felt awkward. I felt shy.
I removed my hand from hers and continued shopping. She noticed it and didn't touch me from that time anymore.
I am not at ease until we arrived home. We're not even talking. But she helped me arranged the stuff we bought on their proper places.

"I'm leaving. Don't forget to lock all your doors.
And I'm— I'm sorry earlier. I did not intend to make you feel uncomfortable in front of strangers at the mall."
She said while looking down. She looked at me before she took a step to leave and I saw in her eyes how sad she is.

God.
Am I scared of judgments?
If ever I will be in a relationship with Lisa, I will not be able to handle it.
Ugh! My thoughts are making my head ache.

"Okay Jennie! Breathe! You're straight, okay? But you're even the one who initiated your kiss last time."
I told myself as I walk to my room.

I texted her around nine to check if she already arrived home safely and she responded right away.

Everyday is a challenging scene for me at school. I always get to see Lisa and Nancy since they are always together. But she drives my car home when Dad or Mom calls her and wants to see have her over dinner with us.
Lisa never refused my parents. She's actually getting closer to them and they are already considering her as their own. Lisa always takes my parents advice about life. She is a good listener. And my parents too love her principles and insights in every thing we talk about.
They love Lisa. My parents take care of her too when she's around. Mom likes her attitude being too respectful and kind.

Lisa and Nancy. They are inseparable. They actually act as if they are a couple but they always deny it. Well, it's actually the truth, but sometimes I really doubt.
Especially when Lisa hugs her anytime of the day and they are too sweet to each other.
Nancy who is always at her side and ready to give all her needs; the comfort, love and time.
Sometimes they are being asked randomly if they are a couple but the two just laugh and ignore those students.

And me? I don't know why lately I want her time. I want her beside me. But shit. I am also shy when we're out to have coffee or eat at a restaurant. I feel anxious. But I always have this feeling of missing her.