Shy From The Spotlight - Alexander Hamilton x Reader

Three

The day went by too slow. My father was constantly asking for me, which was highly unusual.

"Y/N!"

You groan quietly. It was almost sunset and you were making supper with Angelica. "Go on, I'll get this." She said. I gave her an apologetic look before rushing upstairs. I knocked on the doors of my father's study.

"Come in, Y/N."

The door creaked a bit and I walked in. "You called for me?" I asked politely. He was in an off mood for the last few hours and I didn't know why.

"Yes." He said simply. He was writing while he had his back towards me.

"I wanted you to be the first to know, since you would understand the most." He said gravely, setting down his quill. What had happened? I heard him inhale.

"I'm heading off to war."

WHAT?! NO NO NO!!! HE CAN'T!! WHO WILL TAKE CARE OF US?!?!

"W-What?" I stuttered. He hates it when we sound weak, so I hurried to corrected myself. I cleared my throat. "How do you mean? Will you be gone for long?" I asked quietly. He merely nodded.

Mother was quite capable of caring for us, yet she didn't quite understand us as much. Father understood us easier. She may have had less rules than father, yet his were more practical.

"I'll be away for quite some time, but your mother will be here for you." He said quietly. I inhaled sharply, holding back tears. He could come home in a box! Oh my!

"When do you leave?" I asked. I was praying silently. "Three days time." I felt my heart drop.

"Tell your siblings." He said. What?! He wanted me to break the news? "Yes father." I merely said before leaving him. I slowly walked downstairs to the kitchen. Mother was out right now.

"Come to the kitchen!" I shouted. Angelica gave me a concerned look, since the food wasn't even done yet. Everyone rushed in, buzzing for supper. They quieted when they saw my expression.

"F-Father is going to war." I muttered, barely loud enough. Everyone gasped. Catharine, the one year old propped on Elizabeth's hip, gave a quiet wail. "Daddy can't leave!" She wailed. Elizabeth shushed her soothingly.

I felt a small body clutch to my gown. I looked down to find the four year old clutching to me. "It's okay, Cornelia." I murmured, picking her up.

The three boys kept to themselves and looked worried. They would become the men of the house, specifically John. He was just younger than me! "Margarita, can you get them cleaned up for supper?" Elizabeth asked, handing Catharine to her.

"Come now." Margarita said, voice weak. Elizabeth and Angelica faced me. We were the least fazed, but still very.

"What's going to happen now?" I asked my elder sisters. They had to have the answer! They always did! "I-I don't know." They said together. Always, except this time. "Does mother know?" Angelica asked.

"Do I know what?" We heard as the door closed.

We turned to find out mother, in a green gown, walking over. "What happened girls?" She asked, concern lacing her voice. I glanced at my sisters, who nodded.

"Father is going to war." I said, avoiding eye contact. Mother seemed to go slack, only for a moment, before marching upstairs.

"That went well." Elizabeth muttered as Angelica and I went back to the food. We laughed wryly and finished preparation. "Margarita! Supper!" Angelica shouted.

We watched as Margarita forced several small children to the dining table, John and Philip helping. John wrestled Rensselaer into a chair as Philip put Cornelia into her special chair, Margarita doing the same for Catharine.

Angelica, Elizabeth, and I grabbed cutlery and plates and passed out the food before sitting ourselves.

"Why is Daddy going away?" Rensselaer asked suddenly. I blinked at looked to Angelica, who was looking at me. "Y/N, why did Daddy tell you first?" Cornelia asked. I inhaled and faced my little siblings.

"Well, Father is going away to help and be very brave, like we have to be when he is gone." I said, talked to Rensselaer. I faced Cornelia. "Father told me first because he wanted me to tell you." I explained. She looked confused but didn't say anything.

* *

After supper, Angelica, Elizabeth, and Margarita sent us all to bed, though I was only a year younger than Margarita and capable of hearing their conversation.

"Goodnight Y/N." Angelica said as she passed my door. "Goodnight." I said quickly. I waited five minutes before getting out of bed and putting on my long coat. I stepped to the top of the staircase and listened quietly.

"Why did he tell Y/N? She is younger than all of us!" I heard Angelica whisper in a concerned tone.

"Mother will struggle. We will have to send John to work. She was hoping to postpone that. He is only sixteen!" Elizabeth pitched in.

I dreaded the day we would send John to work. He was gentle, had yet to be sent to labor.

"Y/N is planning to meet with C/N tomorrow afternoon! She was so joyful, but knowing Y/N, she will try and cancel to help out." Margarita said sadly. My heart drooped. I was planning on canceling.

"Y/N." I heard a voice whisper from behind me. I paled and turned, still not visible to my sisters, to face my mother.

"What are you doing?" She asked quietly. I folded my hands and walked over, head dipped. "Sorry mother. I wanted to hear any news about when Father leaves in three days." I said in half lie.

She sighed and drew me into a surprise hug. I blinked and hugged back. She let go and kissed my forehead. "Go to bed now." She said gently. I nodded and left for my room. I got into bed and sighed. My last thought before sleep was;

What now?