Shy From The Spotlight - Alexander Hamilton x Reader

Seventy-Five

I was proud enough to know when to stop drinking. I was just too drunk to really stop.

"Well isn't thAT NICE!!" I half shouted when Harry showed us all a tattoo of the Join or Die snake. He howled with laughter and slid his sleeve back down. I giggled uncontrollably.

I heard a clatter and we all turned. "WhAt FaLlEd?" Someone slurred. We all looked around, suddenly distracted.

"WHo eVeR fInDeD iT fIrSt WiNs!" I shouted, dropping to the floor. I heard some shouts, but soon enough, everyone was looking on their hands and knees.

I skittered across the floor, laughing whenever I bumped into someone. "WhAt ArE wE eVeN lOoKiNg FoR?" Harry drawled. I shrugged from beside him and kept looking.

I reached blindly under a table and felt my hand scrape against cold metal. I inhaled. "I fOuNd IT!!" I screamed, reaching further. I heard everyone gather around me and my head buzzed. I grasped around the object and pulled it to me. "WhAt iS iT?" Someone asked. I opened my hand.

A small golden key laid in my palm. "OoOoOo." Someone whispered. "WhAt iS iT?" I snorted. "It'S a KeY yOu BlOoDy IdIoT!" I slurred. They frowned. And I stood. Oh. A key. I'm drunk. This has happened before...

I giggled as uncontrollably as my hiccups. I was in my fourth glass of whiskey, John in his fifth. "AnD iT tUrNs OuT, mY mOtHeR hAd ThE kEy!" I slurred to John. He roared with drunken laughter.

"My FaThEr DiD tHaT wHeN i WaS a SmAlL oNe! DiD yOu KnOw mY fAtHeR iS GeOrGe WeRsHHhhhHiNgTAin?" He slurred back. I giggled and nodded, my hair going in front of my face. John rested his hand on my shoulder and giggled with me.

Oh dear. I stood up and slammed the key on the table. "I nEeD tO sObEr Up." I stated, grabbing a glass and filling it with water.

"No! DoN't Do thAt!" I heard some men shout as I downed the water. Didn't work! I whirled around, head spinning. I couldn't do something that stupid again!

"You DoN't undErStand!" I shouted too loudly, my speech somewhat improving. I downed another glass of water. "I'll be In ThE bUnKs." I managed out, turning. I heard the men pout and complain, but they didn't chase after me.

I staggered across the deck, the swaying boat and dark sky not helping. I paused at the mast, grabbing it for support. I whipped my head around to find the boats apart, but still together. Good, I'll say goodbye tomorrow.

I continued my tedious steps and finally reached the barracks, nearly falling into the room. I slammed the door shut and sighed.

"So, are you happy?" I screeched and jumped, arms flailing. I fell on my bum and turned towards the door.

A candle burned on and I blinked against the soft light. Father? "You managed to out-do every soldier and sailor in this fleet and the next, you managed to run away from home, and then to top it all off, you get stupid drunk."

I scowled and hauled myself into a stand. I dusted myself off before walking to my bed. "I'm not apologizing." I stated as I let my hair loose from its ponytail.

I heard footsteps behind me and had to physically prepare myself for his upcoming words. "I'd be disappointed in you if you did apologize." He said softly, almost sounding defeated. I wasn't expecting that. I blinked in surprise but didn't turn to him.

I heard him sigh. "I'll admit, what you did today was phenomenal." I turned around at his words. Did he just admit without admitting that I am right?

Father chuckled sadly. "But that doesn't mean that you should've run away." He countered. I wiped the shock off my face, replacing it with boredom. I shrugged and turned back to my bed, shuffling through my bag. "Is there a point to this visit?" I said tightly.

Silence. I don't think I've been this disturbed about the lack of sound in my entire life as I am now. Father wasn't a silent one.

"This war is dangerous, Y/N. You should've weighed your options before running off." He stated. I scoffed and faced him again.

"You don't think I know this was is dangerous? It is war. Of course it's dangerous!" He frowned. "I didn't even want this war!! So far, it's brought nothing but evil to our family!" Father looked taken aback at my statement.

"Do you need my to clarify?" No response. "First, you are ripped away from us! And not only that, but you put it on me to tell and explain to everyone why father was leaving us! Do you know what John said to me that night you left?"

I recalled the memory. "He came into my room trembling! He said to me: 'Did he feel like he had to help out more because I wasn't man enough?' You made your first born son feel like he wasn't enough!" Guilt filled father's features.

"And that's not even the worst the war has brought! Isabella's father died, people's loved ones have died, I'm worried sick about you every day, I was nearly raped," He flinched. "It gets worse! Elizabeth worries every day if the two men she loves the most will be brought home in a box! And now C/N could be dead!" Another flinch.

"Is this what you wanted when you went off to war? When you wanted your so called 'freedom'? Just because they knocked the prices up on tea?" Questioning his loyalty and priorities was the worst insult I could give.

He blinked at the frank truth I laid before him. "So, what is the point of this visit?" I finally snapped. He clicked his tongue and shook his head.

"Just here to mend bonds." He said, obviously trying to inflict guilt. I frowned at him. "Well you should've chosen better starting words." I retorted quietly, climbing into my bed. I didn't bother to see if he left.