I'm Fine

Are you ok?

"I am powerful. I am capable. I am in control," Peter said aloud as he showered.

Aunt May always wrote a mantra on a sticky note every morning for him. She started doing it every day after his parents died. The mantras usually helped his thought process but recently they haven't. It was getting harder for Peter to push away his thoughts.

He felt his mind start to go into a dark place. There was no more fight left in him to combat them.

"What's the point of living anymore if I have to deal with these thoughts the time. I can't take it anymore. There are hundreds of pills in the med bay at the tower. I need to find a way to steal so-"

The thought spiral was interrupted as slipped on some shampoo and fell.

He slipped again as he tried to get up. Trying to save himself, he grabbed the shower curtain. Since he was strong, the rod ripped out of the wall and the curtain came crashing down on him.

Peter's body began to shake. Time slowed down as his vision became distorted.

"Nonononono! Not again! Not now!"

He closed his eyes and tried to focus because he did not want a flashback to happen.

"In for four, hold for 3, out for five."

Peter tried the breathing technique Aunt May taught him. It usually worked, but he was already too far gone to calm down.
The flashback went into full speed:

"HELLO!?" He yelled desperately as the building was crushing him. "AHHHH! PLEASE! IM DOWN HERE!" It was excruciatingly cold and rainy outside. His body was stiff. Dirt, rain, and rubble fell into his ears, eyes, and mouth as he was trying to get from under the building. "GAHHHH!" He shouted as he was trying to push the concrete off. He was losing hope. Another piece of metal came crashing down, trapping his left arm.

"Help me!!! No!!!" Peter yelled.

Mentally, the heavy concrete and debris were cracking his ribs. The steady stream coming from the shower felt like the frigid rain.

His body rattled violently as the hyperventilating increased.

Peter felt the familiar light headed feeling he gets with his panic attacks.

"Oh fuck, I'm gonna pass out-"
~~~~
Peter shivered as he felt the shower water pouring on him. He winced as he touched the newly formed bruise on his head.

"You have 30 minutes until school starts Mr. Parker."

"Thanks, Karen. I'm going"
~~~
"Today already sucks. I had a panic attack, fainted in the shower, and forgot to do my homework," Peter told himself while walking toward the entrance to the school.

"I just need to get through today so I can go to sleep. I wish I could fall asleep and never wake up. Maybe I should take a mental health day. May would understand especially since I had another episode. No, she pays a lot of money for me to go here. I need to suck it up..."

He was deep in his spiral of thoughts until he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder.

Peter turned around, looked straight into his beautiful brown eyes, and immediately all his anxious thoughts went away. He melted on the inside from his touch. He let his eyes travel across his honey-brown face and luscious lips.