Brooklyn 99: Jake Peralta x Reader

Chocolate Milk Part 3

You, Jake and Terry walked up to a woman with a baby.

"Have you seen this man around Drk Mlk?" Terry asked, holding up a pictures of Gregory Phillips.

"Oh, I don't go there. They don't allow babies in there" the woman replied.

"What is wrong with them? All I drank when I was a baby was chocolate milk" said Jake.

"Well, thank you for your time" you said.

"And thank you, adorable little baby, who's probably giving Terry some very mixed feelings right about now. 'Don't get the operation, Sarge! Instead, make a tiny muscular friend for me to play with!" Jake said, imitating a baby's voice.

"That's enough" said Terry.

"I'm with you. That's enough, baby. Mind your own business" said Jake.

Later that day, you, Jake and Terry were talking to another woman.

"I've never heard of Drk Mlk and I've never seen this man before" she said, handing back the picture of Gregory.

"This is your lead? Why are we here?" asked Terry.

"Well, according to the Internet, Dr Mindel is the best couples counselor in the Parks Slope area who accepts same-day walk-ins" Jake said.

"Couples counseling! Sorry for wasting your time" Terry said, leaving the room.

"Wait, please don't leave. This cost me so much money" said Jake.

"I am so sorry" you said.

"He's walking out... Just like Jake's father did" said the woman.

"Wait, a minute, I didn't tell you about that" Jake said.

"Didn't have to" said the woman.

"You are good!" said Jake, before running after Terry followed by you. "Sarge, wait up! Don't be mad! Look, I'm only trying to protect you from your very stupid self."

"That is enough, Jake!" Terry said.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay? But the things you said when you were whacked out were real. You made us promise. And as your friend -" Jake said.

"I told you, Jake. We're not that kind of friends" Terry said.

"Not what kind of friends?" you asked.

"'Friend' friends. You, me and y/n are work friends. Now, if you will excuse me, I'm going to the doctor's office" said Terry.

"Not good enough" said Jake.

You watched as Jake said "Prepare to be physically overpowered by a 'friend' friend" and jumped on Terry's back, trying to stop him from walking.

Five minutes later, you watched, laughing, as Jake hugged Terry's waist from the front and said "I've got you! You can't move."

Then, you watched Jake hug Terry's leg and say "Concede defeat, sir! You have been conquered."

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You and Jake ran into the hospital just as Terry was getting wheeled to his surgery.

"Sarge, hey!" said Jake.

"What the hell are you doing here, tiny head? You better not be trying to talk me out my surgery again" Terry said.

"Look, we're not trying to talk you out of anything. We're just here to give you a ride home and to prove to you once and for all that we're more than just work friends" you said.

"Thank you" said Terry.

"Hey, a little bit of good news! I figured out the case! Well, remember that Gregory said that he got off at York Street the night of the stabbing? Well, I took the subway here and it's closed for construction" Jake explained.

"So what you're saying is... I stabbed him. I did it" said Terry.

"You know what? We'll talk about it tomorrow" you said.

"See you on the other side" Jake said as Terry was wheeled away.

"Jake, you were right! I don't want the surgery, tiny head!" yelled Terry.

Jake sighed. "NYPD! Put down the scalpel and step away from my work friend's weiner-tubes!"

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"Hey, how'd the interrogation go?" Terry asked as he walked over to the kitchen unit where you and Jake were.

"Gregory confessed to the stabbing" you said.

"Nice work. I just talked to my wife. We're waiting on the operation, everthing's cool" said Terry.

"Did you tell her we slept together twice?" asked Jake.

"Thanks for taking care of me. I got you a present" Terry said, passing Jake a box.

"Do you know what a present is, Terry?" you asked, seeing that the present was carrots.

"I care about my friends. Now eat your carrots, or I'll rip your tiny head off" said Terry.

And you watched as Terry took Jake in a headlock and force fed him carrots.