What I'd Give to See Through You

What falling in love feels like

TW: intense depictions of self-harm and insecurities, mild reliving of trauma

Thursday 9, October
POV: Aeson

Aeson: -I woke up, starting immediately to get ready reluctantly as any other day, but today I heard knocks on my door a bit earlier than the usual.- good morning. -I opened the door suspiciously, only peeking to see who was outside.- oh, hi Jaden. -I said now opening the door and showing myself. I do only have my pants on though. I'm pretty sure I shouldn't have done that, it's cold. But things like this have happened before.-

Jaden: hi... -he said looking at my body, abdomen, specifically. Funny. As I said, I wasn't late, he was too early.
To be fair and sincere, I do have something like an "athletic" body. Not in the super buffed strong superhero type of body, but it's still something. It may sound senseless but I got it practically out of stress. I like working out when I feel stress, it's my way to handle it. In general, I work out regularly. It's healthy, I guess. And girls love it. Jaden already knew that, and every time something like this happened he would cover his eyes. But today he looks completely shocked, almost mesmerized. Oh, I feel flattered.-

Aeson: ...are you liking what you see? -I asked, flirty but jokingly after some seconds of being in complete silence with him just staring at me.-

Jaden: God, sorry, continue getting ready. -he said, looking at the floor, ashamed, so flustered. He looks cute like that.-

Aeson: don't worry. -I smiled, putting on my shirt and my jacket, then my coat. It is cold today.- it's cold today, isn't it? -I asked at Jaden, finally passing my fingers through my hair to then go out for Lio, Avy and Reagan.-

Jaden: yes... it's true what Reagan said your cheeks and nose are red. -he said, smiling tenderly. That smile is just too beautiful for me to be worthy of seeing it in a daily basis. It's not a lie that I've always found Jaden's smile enchanting. He is enchanting. All of him. And God, he's been for so long. How did I never notice all these feelings?-

Aeson: yours are too. -I answered him, knocking on Lio's door.-

Lio: good morning. -she opened.- hey guys! -she said, walking out of her room to Avy's. The routine.-

Avy: good morning! How are you guys? -she opened her door, smiling how only she could do at this hour in the morning.-

...

Aeson: -the six of us are sitting down, eating breakfast as routinely. The girls sat together in front of us and are chatting about a new haircut Avy saw on social media and asked how it would look on her. I'm sitting in between Jaden and Adrian, eating quietly and listening to the conversation in front of us, until Adrian touched my shoulder, calling me. I turned to look at him, and he gets closer to my ear to whisper something.-

Adrian: can I ask you something without it offending you? -he asked me. That's a weird question and I immediately feel on edge by it.-

Aeson: yea, sure, what's up? -I whispered back.-

Adrian: by any chance... do you know if -he stopped a second, thinking.- I'm really not trying to offend anyone here, yeah? -he asked again. Unnecessary. I'm getting nervous.-

Aeson: yeah, man. Just let it out.

Adrian: do you know if Jaden is available? Not for me, of course, I mean... well, also, does he like dudes? -he asked. That's very blunt. If I'm sincere I don't want to answer that question. What's he trying to imply?-

Aeson: uh, why're you asking? -I ask, looking at him frowning. He moves his hands like asking me to not think weird things. I do think weird things.-