The Lies Hidden In Our Vows (Jungkook ff)

Chapter Nine ≈ A Place To Call Home ≈

My eyes leisurely blink open, head sunken inside the fluffy silk pillow. I stare blankly into the pale ceiling, unaware of where I lay. I turned my head and took small glimpses around the room, lacking the energy to get up. Everything seemed unfamiliar and faint. A tightness began to kick in from the bottom of my throat, which in turn caused me to crave water. I rub my eyes in a soothing motion with the back of my hand, as memories from last night flashes quickly through my mind; like highlights of an old movie.

My body jolts up as if I had been struck by lightning. My gaze snaps beside me; my teeth sink into the corner of my bottom lip while I slowly peeked one of my eyes open only to see an empty, crumpled up bed sheet beside me. No Jungkook to be seen. I let out a groan inside of my pillow as I fell back onto the middle of the bed.

Why can't this be a damn dream!?

My desperate whine is engulfed by the pillow that I pressed against my face. I lay on my stomach while my feet kick the empty air in frustration. Only one night had passed and thus far - I was ready to rip my hair out. I can't live like this. I didn't have the strength to be living under their watchful gazes for the rest of my life. Oblivious to what lay ahead, even if it meant it was the death of me, more precisely my father's.

I wouldn't let myself be manipulated by that psychopath and his asshole of a son. I sat up from the heart-clenching thought. No, I can't do that to myself, I had to get out of here. I wouldn't be a chess piece in their little game. I won't let them make me something that I don't want to be, so they could reach their achievements. They can't control me. No one owned me. I belong to myself, and not even the darkest of days could keep me from believing that.

But I looked down at the heavy piece of silver that squeezed my ring finger. I allowed my fingers to grip around the ruffles of the disgustingly beautiful stone that was placed in the middle of the silver strip. But I could never fill my desire with this stupid ring glued onto my finger. I tried to yank the ring off, but it was stuck. I fumbled with the ring a bit more, and in one pull, it flicked off, flying into the air. I tried to catch it, but it bounced from one palm to the other like a hot potato, eventually landing on the edge of the bed.

"Don't fall, don't fall, please don't fall!" I chanted in my mind as I crawled closer towards the priceless ring. I watched in horror as the ring fell onto the floor from the shift of my weight on the bed in slow motion.

Shit!

I quickly jumped from the bed. I held my hair back to let me have a full view around the room as I anxiously tried to spot the ring that's probably worth more than my life. My gaze scoured the floor as I recited my prayers in my mind, hoping the ring was still in one piece as I went down on both my knees to check underneath the bed. I closed my eyes in relief when I spotted the diamond still intact, as it shone boldly in the dim light underneath the bed.

I stretched my arm under the bed, grabbing the ring, and sat up before I leaned against the side of the bed. I held the ring between my thumb and index finger, studying it.

I have always wondered if I ran from the past, would it be like this? Would it hold me back if I pulled hard enough? If I was strong enough, maybe I could be set loose from the invisible chains that held me tightly. The chains that had always felt like a noose around my throat, which grew tighter and tighter as the days passed, suffocating me until the day came when I would finally snap.

I wanted to run and hide - to leave this place, but living on the run and wondering when they would finally track me down every single day, was the same as living under this roof. No matter where I went, their presence would always haunt me.