ArShi FF: Fragmented Colors

Chapter 14: Anew

"I'm so relieved we got everything done in time. Aashna just needs to get dressed, her makeup and hair is done, thank goodness. You have the ring, right Khushi? By the way, do you think this earring goes with this sari? Khushi, are you listening?"

Everything seems to fade to a silent buzz of a sound, deafeningly inaudible. Her hand carelessly slips on the chain of her bracelet and it clinks as it drops to the floor.

"Uff, what is wrong with you?" Payal picks it up, handing it to her. "Ever since last night you've been behaving oddly. Did something happen?"

Her brain becomes alert, finally registering her sister's words. She makes an effort to nod reassuringly, and it quietens Payal for the time being. What Khushi refrained from admitting was that something did happen, and it caused her world to turn upside down. It had opened the gates to a vast ocean of questions, of memories. An ocean she had kept herself from pining to drink from, despite her coveted thirst.

Yet last night, that ocean flooded her entire being uninhibitedly.

Why? Why does she find herself pining like she did fourteen years ago?

Her mind goes to the painful memory of that fateful night when she had left him despite wanting nothing but to be with him, to stay in his embrace. But she was tied helpless to the circumstances. When she had arrived at home in Delhi several hours later, her mother ran into her arms through the corridors of the hospital, crying for her husband who lay unconscious on a bed, his body still recovering from a severe heart attack. Her pregnant sister had stayed up day and night, making sure there were no insufficiencies in his medical procedures. Looking at her family and her father's sleeping face, she knew at that moment that she had made the right decision. From then on she made the choice to give her entirety to her family, to rekindling their faith, and to building her career.

What no one saw behind her dedication and uplifting smile, however, was a girl of twenty-two trying to mend the broken pieces of her heart. Hoping that someday, the person she loved would forgive her.

Days turned into months and eventually long years, and she kept it all a secret, buried underneath life's reality. On countless occasions her conscience yearned to reach out to him, to ask of his well being, to simply hear the sound of his voice. And then she would remind herself that she had no chance of contacting him. He had her temporary phone number when she was in California, but when she had returned, that number became useless. A part of her always knew that she would probably be able to find him if she searched for a trace of him somewhere, a source to reach him. The other part of her resisted, doubting if he'd even respond, doubting if he still felt the same way. And so she stopped trying, remembering him only on quiet nights as a memory most cherished.

Until one day, she picked up the morning newspaper only to gape at one of the headlines, blinking to reread it again and again.

"Businessman Arnav Singh Raizada takes America by storm"

She had read the article five times over before letting a smile glow on her face. The writer of the article had praised him for his success in the field, with his company spreading over eight branches across the United States. Along with the article was a picture of him, and she remembers how her fingers had swept across the printed paper, astounded that she could finally see him, even if it were just an image. After years of repenting she had felt happiness, for him. Happy that he had found success, happy that he had made his father proud.

But that was two years ago. Never in her wildest dreams did she ever fathom the fact that he would be right in front of her, warm and present. And now that he was... her emotions knew no bounds.

"Khushi, are you seriously okay? Do you feel sick?" Her sister's question breaks her trail of thought once again. Payal rests her hand on Khushi's forehead, checking her temperature.