HEADPHONES ‧ k.tsukishima

𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭;

(a/n: listen to the song at the top, afraid by the neighbourhood, for this chapter

'Atsuko.' Mrs Daichi said with a dangerous tone in her voice.

Atsuko trembled, 'Yes, mum' Her voice wobbled.

'What... did I tell you about calling me... that.'

'Sorry, mother dearest. P-please continue.' 

'Why... are you not class representative.' 

Atsuko shivered. Her older brother gripped her hand underneath the table in an attempt to calm her.

'I... I don't know.' Atsuko stared miserably at her plate of cold food.

She heard cutlery clanging to the floor and a chair scraping against the floor. Mrs Daichi stood up and walked over to Atsuko's chair. She stood behind and placed a firm hand on her shoulder. 

Mrs Daichi leaned forward and whispered in Atsuko's ear in a venomous tone,

'You... don't know?"

Atsuko felt tears pool in the corners of her eyes. Mrs Daichi straightened up and grabbed Atsuko's plate.

'Go to bed. Think about what you've done. I wish you were more like your brother. Such a disappointment. And for god's sake, change out of that vulgar hoodie. Shame upon our family.'

Atsuko felt hot tears run down her cheek as she walked to her room and closed the door. She collapsed onto the floor and crumpled into a ball. She was racked with pain and sobs.

You're too mean, I don't like you, fuck you anyway

Atsuko grabbed her headphones. This was her only escape. Distract herself with music. Evade her problems. Pretend her mother didn't exist. Fuck her mother.

You make me wanna scream at the top of my lungs

She blasted her music. Atsuko tangled her fingers in her hair and curled up in a ball. She wanted to scream, to rip out her hair. She could still feel the tears dripping off her chin.

It hurts but I won't fight you

You suck anyway

Atsuko knew that she didn't have the strength to fight back. To protect herself. Her mind was slowly crumbling, along with it her confidence. Everyday, 'Disappointment' rebounded around her mind. 'I wish you were more like your brother'. But she isn't. Atsuko was just the disappointment child. A mistake.

You make me wanna die, right when I...

Fuck life.

When I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might take my place

Atsuko was scared. And alone. 

But she wasn't.

She wiped tears from her face when she thought of her friends. Eri, Yamaguchi, her brother Daichi. Sugawara senpai. All these people, always there for her. 

And... Tsukishima. 

There is so much to live for.

Atsuko laughed.

But her problems were far from over.