Walls Surrounding his Heart {|Eruri|}

25

(--Author's Note--) 

My goal when writing this today was to make someone cry :)

//

"Aim your musket." Erwin ordered in a whispering tone, blowing out the lantern he held. 

Levi nodded in response, making as minimal noise possible. His sights matched where he looked; ready to fire with the wave of a hand. He walked short ways ahead of Erwin, protecting him from the hypothetical threat. 

"I will investigate the corpse." Erwin informed, eying his surroundings carefully. "Go survey and secure the area." 

"Understood." Levi agreed respectfully, parting ways with Erwin. 

The captain swiftly dashed through the bushes, only the rustling of leaves echoing throughout the dense forest. Levi left not one corner unchecked, not one bush unsearched nor one leaf unturned. After he was one hundred percent sure that no dangers were imminent, he began returning to Erwin for further orders. 

"Commander." Levi spoke, tapping Erwin's back. "No one's here except us." 

Erwin did not turn to face Levi. He was too entranced by a crumbled note in his palm to notice his captain's calls. 

"Oi." Levi called, tapping Erwin's back with much more force. "Did you hear me?" 

"Read this." Erwin spoke, turning to Levi with a comforting stare. "You will understand." 

"Tsk." Levi spat, grabbing the paper from Erwin. "What do you mean by I'll 'understand'?" 

---

To whoever found me. 

I just... I don't know how to put 'why' into words... I'll try though. It's the least I can do.

I've only told one person about this, but that doesn't matter anymore...

I felt like I wasn't worthy of representing Humanity. I wasn't worthy of being in the Corps, and much less sere under Humanity's strongest. 

I couldn't defend friends or myself from anything. I hated living in the constant fear that those who I held close could be snatched away at any moment, and I couldn't do anything to help. 

I was a weak, pathetic, sad little crybaby, and I knew it. I hated myself more than I did the Titans. I lost my will to fight them long ago. 

I know this was selfish. I am selfish. 

Eren, and Mikasa. Go see the ocean. Tell me what it's like. Tell me about the flaming waters, the frozen lands and the fields of sands. 

I'll always be watching over you two. I'll always be listening. Good luck. 

Captain Ackerman, thank you. 

You helped me when I cried under this very tree. You payed attention to me when no one else did. You trained me to be better when I said I was weak. Actually, by using that very pull-up training from that day, I was able to pull myself up onto this branch. 

You understood me and what I was feeling like no one else. Almost, too much. Are we not that different? 

I'm talking too much again. I was always mumbling nonsense to myself, wasn't I?

Sorry.

---

"What?" Levi gasped, finally close enough to identify the boy. "This can't be..."