A Reason To Love

Ch. 28

Hello darlings! Happy Memorial Day!
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They never tell you that watching a casket that's holding one of your loved ones lower into the ground breaks a piece of your heart you will never get back. A piece of my heart went into the casket my dad laid in when it closed for the last time, a piece so deep I'll never feel whole again.

The days after my dad died blurred. Days felt like weeks and weeks felt like months. A week after he died and after his funeral I finally went back to school not because I wanted to but because I know my dad would want me to. That's all he did was push me to do things people my age do. He wanted me to go to school even though I was ready to just finish online. That's the only reason I am in my car sitting in the parking lot.

This past week has been hell. I don't talk much. I can't eat without feeling sick to my stomach. I barely sleep. Will and Elise come by but we usually sit in silence. They don't push me to talk and for that I am thankful. Mom throws herself into her work but I still see the sadness in her eyes. She is trying to be strong for me but she doesn't need to. Sure I feel like a zombie, a fraction of the person I used to be but I am not going to fall apart. That's the last thing my dad would want. I needed this week to remind myself that my dad wouldn't want me to fall apart.

Stepping out of my car I inhale and exhale a few times trying to regain my composure. No one here knows my dad died. That's a plus to not having any friends here, no one can look at me with pity in their eyes.

A mess of blond hair attached to Will falls in stride beside me as I walk to the school. He grabbed my hand interlacing our fingers together. The feel of his hand wrapped through my own brought a sense of comfort I couldn't put into words.

Once we make it inside we go to my locker so I can exchange my textbooks. Will stood resting against the lockers beside mine waiting for me. I could feel him glancing at me every so often but didn't engage in conversation and for that I was thankful.

"Will I'm not going to fall apart, you don't have to look at me like I am going to break at any given moment." I smile sadly at him.

"I'm not looking at you like you're going to break Cammy. I'm looking at you because you're beautiful." My heart tightened as his brown eyes lit up. I stood on my tip toes and placed a feathery kiss on his lips.

"I love you William." I meant every word with my entire being.

"I love you Cameron." I closed my locked and leaned into Will who instantly wrapped an arm around me pulling me closer.

"There's only a few weeks left of school Cam. I will be here for you every step of the way." He smiled softly at me causing my heart to flip flop inside my chest.

"I'm sorry, I know I'm not the girlfriend you signed up for."

"Baby look at me. I knew exactly what I was getting into when we started dating. You're not a burden to me. Don't for one second think that you are. You are grieving. You lost someone special. I know first hand what that's like. So like I said I will be here every single step of the way. Now come on beautiful let's get you to class." Will laced our fingers together and pulled me towards our class. Will's words floated around inside of my head. How in the world did I get so lucky to have him?

"Why would you want to be with me?"

"What do you mean?" He frowned, a concerned look appearing on his face as if he didn't understand my question.

"Having gone through this yourself, why would you want to date someone you knew would go through it soon themselves?"

"Cammy you truly have no idea how special you really are. I knew it the second I met you. I knew your dad was sick and didn't have long yet that didn't stop me from wanting to get to know you, to be with you. Once I got to know you, I fell in love with you. I'm not a really religious man but I believe in the big man upstairs and I think he knew we needed each other. He knew I needed you to show me what real love is and he knew you needed me to love you and get you through this."

I stopped in my tracks and threw my arms around his neck slamming my lips on his before kissing along his jaw towards his neck. He groaned when I nipped at his neck. Will's hands roamed down my sides before sliding under my butt lifting me in his arms. I wrapped my legs around his waist our lips never separating.

"Let's get out of here." I whispered in his ear and he was out of the school within seconds. We ran through the parking lot with the wind in our hair and the sounds of our laughter in the air. The entire ride to Will's house my hands roamed up and down his thighs. My body pressed his back I felt more alive than I have in the past week. He barely parked his bike before I jumped on him.

He carried us to his room and slammed the door shut before tossing me on his bed. In seconds our clothes were thrown around his room. Our lips only separating when needed before they found their way back to each other. Will grabbed a condom from his bedside table and tore the foil wrapped. He rolled the condom on while I stared in amazement.

In one swift movement he slammed into me, causing me to cry out his name. His thrusts were slow. He laced our fingers together and rested them beside my face, our eyes locked on one another. Our bodies moved together meeting each other thrust for thrust. I felt my first release building up taking me higher and higher until I felt it pull me under. I felt my body convulse around Will who grunted in return. He peppered kisses on my lips and down my jaw.

Sure Will can tell me he loves me all we wants but here in this moment I have never felt it to be more true as our bodies move together connect as one. A connection so deep, so raw saying everything words can't.