this is the start | gilinsky

Chapter Thirty-Five

    By the time Jack and I are back at my place it's eight o'clock. I really don't feel like dealing with Dad right now; I've been here long but not long enough to know what he's like when he's angry. I can't believe I did this to him. I can't believe I lied like this. I know Jack was only trying to help when he was telling me to loosen up but look where that got us. 

    We sit in Jack's jeep for a few more minutes until he forces me out onto the driveway, "I know, John." He tells me, "We really just need to get this over with." I know he's right but a part of me disagrees with everything he is saying. I want to just turn around and run. 

    Jack puts his hand in mine and we walk towards the house together. Before we can even knock on the door it swings open and I see Dad. His eyes are wild and I actually feel like I'm about to faint. I know I always feel like that when I'm nervous but my head is making me think it may happen for real this time. 

     The three of us stand in silence for a little bit until Dad steps back and invites us into the house. I force Jack to let go of my hand and we make our way into the family room and fall back on the couch. I hear Violet's barks from upstairs. He probably has her locked in the bathroom so she doesn't try to console me. Poor dog. 

    Dad slowly makes his way towards us but doesn't take a seat anywhere. This worries me even further. He can't be that mad though, right? All I did was sneak out for one night...is that bad? I've never done this before. 

    "Marley..."

    I cringe at the sound. His voice is a mixture of tired and angry. Never a good sign.

    "Dad..." I mock, trying to lighten the mood. It fails. I see Jack hold back a chuckle next to me. How can he not be the least bit worried about this situation?

    "Where's your phone?" He questions. His voice has lifted a little and I can't tell if I should be relieved or not.

    "It's dead," I confess, "That's why I haven't answered any of your calls - if you did call." 

    "Of course I called!" The newly-found harshness has returned to his vibe. 

    "I'm so-"

    "I asked you where your phone was, not why you didn't pick up." He says, interrupting me.

    Sheepishly, I pull the device out of my pocket and hand it to him.

    "I don't want to know where you were," Dad starts, "I don't want to know what you were doing..." He stops to get a good look at Jack. I can tell her thinks we had sex. I want to tell him he's wrong, that nothing really happened, that we only got to second base, but I knew that would just spell for more trouble so I kept my mouth shut. "I just want to know why?" He asks. He has a look of desperation on his face.

    I sink lower into the couch cushion and sigh. I have no idea what to say. Honestly, I don't know why I decided to ignore his rule. A part of it was because of Jack, and him wanting me to just be fun, but a part of it was also for myself. Because I wanted to. But I know where that answer would get me so I stayed silent. 

    "It was my fault..." Jack speaks. I look over at him and give him the stink eye. He pushes me away and continues to talk, "I was taunting her, telling her not to be such a wimp and go out with me." He admits, "She really didn't want to but I continued to bug her about it and I showed up at the house without giving her a warning and picked her up." Okay so that was a lie, but something told me to just let him keep spewing out these words. "I take full responsibility, I was only trying to spice up the night." 

     "Spice up the night by kidnapping my daughter?" Dad chuckles. It's a mad laugh. He's mad and he's laughing. Not good I'm assuming. 

    "Nothing happened, Dad." I say. 

    "So then what did happen, Marley? I know I said I didn't want to know, but now I do." He crosses his arms and now I suddenly wish I was back with Mom in New York. I still have no idea why she left him, it's not like he doesn't know how to parent. He's doing a pretty well job at punishing me. 

    "We just went sight-seeing." I tell him. 

    "I took her to this open field and we just looked at the stars...talked and stuff." Jack says trying to stay calm. I can tell he doesn't like admitting what we were doing out loud. I guess it makes him feel all sappy, which should make him feel good, but I'm presuming it doesn't. Maybe he just wanted to keep it private?

    "Talked about what?" 

    I don't know why Dad was pushing for so much information. I wish he'd just drop it and ground me. He's making this process so long it feels like it's been thirty minutes of us talking about the same shit over and over again. 

    "Just stuff, Dad, can we please hurry this along? We were talking sitting out in the field and we fell asleep, okay? That's what happened." The anger in my voice surprises me. 

    "Ya'know what, Mar..." Dad takes a deep breath then lets it go, "This may not seem like a big deal to you but I had no idea where you were, Sammy tried assuring me you guys were fine, but all I could think about was having to call your mother and tell her that you had disappeared - do you know how horrible I was feeling?" 

    I feel my throat start to close and my eyes well up. I haven't even thought about it like that. I'm such a shitty daughter, "Dad I'm so sorry, I had no idea." I tell him, "I didn't mean to hurt you or make you feel like that I was just - I was just trying to be a normal teenage girl." 

    Dad doesn't say anything for a while, but when he speaks it's only to tell me to go up to my room. He doesn't tell me I'm grounded, he doesn't yell any mean things, he just let's me go scotch free. I hear him take Jack outside and try to listen to their muffled voices from outside but it's no use.

    Flopping down on my bed I close my eyes. I fucked up real bad. I just wish I didn't have so much fun doing it.

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HAPPY VALENTINES DAY EVERYONE!!! here is a new chapter as a gift lol I hope it's not too boring since I focused mostly on Marley and her Dad but I just wanted this chapter to show the kind of relationship they were bulding and stuff. The next chapter will be more exciting (hopefully you guys think so too after your read it lol) but anyway YEAH chapter thirty-six will be up soon and if you guys have any idea or advice leave them in the comments! and don't forget to vote if you'd like, Much love - gilinskyshigh