this is the start | gilinsky

Chapter Eight

    "You're not going in?" Nate reveals. I'm snapped out of my daze and look up to see that everyone has run off towards the dock. Me and Nate are the only ones still standing at the car. My eyes search for Gilinsky and Leigh and see him picking her up and throwing her into the water as she squeals. I frown. Nate follows my gaze and clears his throat. Great. He caught me staring at Jack. 

    "No." I say, leaning up against Gilinsky's jeep. On the way to the party there were enough seats for everyone, but on the way to the lake Mallory had to sit on Johnson's lap and Leigh sat on Gilinsky's. Nate drove, so I sat next to him in the passenger seat. 

    "Why not?" He inquires. 

    I'm about to tell him that it's because I didn't bring a bathing suit, but I know he'd just say to swim in my underwear and bra like Mal and Leigh are doing; I shrug. 

    "You shrug a lot." He declares. 

    "Are you going in?" I make the conversation we're having about him. He shrugs back at me. 

    "You don't need to babysit me, go in." I demand. Nate seems to enjoy my annoyance, because he chuckles.

    "I'm not staying here to babysit you, Mar. Who said I wanted to go in?" 

    He did have a point. Just because all the other guys wanted to go in didn't mean he did too. I'm just used to jumping to conclusions. 

    "So. You're new here, where did you come from?" Nate plops himself down on the floor right in front of me and crisscrosses his legs. I sigh angrily. I wish I could crisscross my legs but this stupid skirt I'm wearing would totally flash him. "What? Was that a personal question?" 

    "No, I'm just mad that I'm in a skirt." I proclaim.

    Nate gets the same look on his face that Sammy does whenever he's about to say something really stupid. "Then take it off." And there it is. 

    Rolling my eyes I fall onto the ground and tuck my legs to the left, leaning my shoulder against the jeep. "New York." I tell him. 

    He nods his head in approval. "New York's chill." 

    "Yeah, I guess." 

    "Why did you decide to come here for the summer?" He asks. 

    "What is this, twenty questions?" I give him a small smirk. 

    "Yes, now let me finish asking you my questions then you can ask me yours." Nate bids. I nod my head in agreement. "So - why'd you come to Omaha out of all places?" 

    "My dad lives here, parents are divorced." I keep my answer short and simple. 

    "When was the last time you were here for a visit?" 

    "I've never been here before, Dad left when I was thirteen and I haven't seen him since." I admit. Nate looks perplexed.

    "Why'd your mom finally decide you should visit?"

    I want to tell Nate about my anxiety. I want to tell him that Mom thought it'd be good for me to be in a new environment. To get used to meeting new people. But for some reason I can't gain the courage to so instead I shrug my shoulders. I guess that's how Nate can tell his questions are steering in the wrong direction so he bails the topic.

    "Do you have any questions for me?" 

    I think for a second if there was anything I wanted to know about Nate. The longer I think about it, the more clear it becomes that although I think Nate is actually really sweet, it's Gilinsky I want to know about. So I clear my throat and ask, "Would it be weird if we talked about Gilinsky?" 

    A different emotion flashes across Nate's face but it's gone too fast for me to figure out what it was. I start to feel bad. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to hurt your feelings." Right after I say this Nate shakes his head. 

    "You didn't hurt my feelings." His tone his harsher than I expected. He's getting defensive with me, and I can tell he's annoyed.

    "Okay." Is this the last thing I say to him before standing up from the dirt and turning my attention to the lake. Every now and then I catch a glimpse of Gilinsky and Leigh and make myself mad, so to feel better I look over at Sammy, who is third wheeling with Johnson and Mallory. I cross my arms and bite my lower lip. Why did I even ask about Jack? That was so stupid of me. I was having a nice conversation with Nate and we were getting to know each other; I ruined it. I'm so mad at myself. I'm so selfish.

    Nate doesn't say anything else to me. He stays seated and picks at the rocks that are stuck in the dirt. The sound of laughter coming from the lake makes me wish I wasn't me. It makes me wish I was more like Mallory, or even more like Leigh. I don't have to know anything about her to know that she's pretty damn cool if Gilinsky is into her.

    Why do I even care who Gilinsky is into? Nate is hot as hell and he's actually paying attention to me. Why am I spending all my time focused on Jack?

    I look down at my outfit for what feels like the millionth time that night. Maybe Nate's just paying attention to me because my clothes are tight and he's like every other teenage boy in the world. Jack payed attention to me even when I was wearing my ugly t-shirt and old jeans. But Johnson and Sammy payed attention to me too, so what's so different about Gilinsky? 

    Getting annoyed with myself, I push all thoughts of the boys out of my head and stare at the dock.

    "Marley!" Sammy's voice calls me from the water. "Get your ass in this water we only have like five minutes before we have to head back!"

    "Does it look like I care!?" I shout.

    Out of the corner of my eye I see Nate stand up and pull off his shirt. My stomach clenches. I catch him looking over at me then running over to the dock to go jump in. I know what he's trying to do, and it's not going to work. I'm staying right where I am.

    "C'mon, Mar! Don't be such a debby downer!" Mallory yells at me from in the arms of Johnson. She looks like she's high with that damn smile on her face.  

    "My name isn't Debby." I say it low enough so no one else hears my stupid joke. I watch Sam pull himself out of the water and onto the dock. He whips his hair around like he's a dog, trying to shake all the water off. His shorts ride dangerously low, so I look down at my feet.

    I hear the dirt crunching as he gets closer to me. "Whether it's tomorrow, the next day, or next month - we're getting you in that lake." Sammy assures me. 

    "Dream on." I smile at him. Before he can say something about wet dreams, I make my way to the other side of the jeep. I'm finally going home. 

_____________________________________________________________________________

thanks for reading! chapter nine will be up soon, p.s happy new years haha it's officially 2015 where I live. anyway remember if you have any advice or suggestions dont be afraid to share them with me! much love - gilinskyshigh