She was already there when Anna finally arrived - waiting. Waiting for her.
Anna couldn’t help but feel nervous as she walked up to her, tugging on her curls anxiously as she stepped by her side, where the two girls overlooked the lake in a moment of silence.
“Are you supposed to be out of bed right now?” Ginny finally broke the quiet, turning to Anna, who shrugged awkwardly.
“Priorities.” She only said for explanation, realizing her cue as she sighed, and dropped her arms to her sides. “I’m really sorry, Ginny. For everything. You were right. I don’t have it together. I never did.”
Anna turned away, looking back at the blazing morning sun - burning a hole in her vision. It was easier than meeting Ginny’s eyes.
It wasn't that she had never been okay. Last year, she had made major headway in sorting out the grief and loss that came with losing a family all over again. But emotions weren't something that could just be magically fixed.
The loss would hit harder some days, the guilt. But all she could do was learn how to grieve correctly. What happened, happened. There was no changing it.
The only thing she could do is better herself. And that journey began with apologizing to Ginny.
“I can’t blame you for not being me, and not being there when my foster family was killed. I didn't tell you at first, and that's on me. It’s just…” She inhaled sharply. “I’m alone, Gin. And it seems like every time I find a place, every time I find a family, a home; they’re taken away from me. And I’m just here - existing.”
She chuckled awkwardly, subtly wiping at her eyes. “And I think I’ve always been a pessimist. It helps, you know - to keep yourself from being constantly disappointed. But I can’t let my past define me - I can't keep going backwards and back into bad habits. It’s just so hard to push down sometimes.”
Hands were suddenly on her shoulders, and she was whipped around and forced to look Ginny right in the eye - her irises sparkling with a mixture of sadness and fury. “Stop it, Anna. Okay - just stop it. You don’t ‘not let your past define you’ by forgetting it. Your history is what makes you who you are.” Ginny smiled softly. “You're right. Your parents are always going to be dead - along with your foster family - but that doesn’t mean you can’t be happy. That you can’t take the lessons they taught you and let them live through you.”
Anna’s eyes welled up once again. “But they’re dead - dead because of me. I’m here and they aren’t. How can I make peace with that?”
Ginny pursed her lips. “You said that they’re dead because of you, but they aren’t. Some wizard murdered them - were you that wizard? Did you send that wizard? No. That wizard came and killed them of his or her own volition. Don’t you get it? None of it is your fault.”
“But they’re still dead.” Anna said quietly. “My family is dead. I have no home.”
“Then what am I? A piece of trash?” She asked incredulously. “Harry is your family. I’m your family. My brothers, my parents, Hermione - we all consider you family. And Hogwarts is your home. It’s where you belong - happy with the people you love. And we aren’t going anywhere.”
She had promised herself she wouldn’t cry. She had broken down in tears in front of too many people and too many times. But her tears refused to be held back, and she launched herself into Ginny’s arms, and the two indifferent and hardheaded girls began to cry together - blubbering out apologies until their tear ducts dried out, and they finally separated - both their cheeks red with slight embarrassment.
“So don’t you dare say you’re alone. Because that’s just a flat-out lie.” Ginny wiped at her eyes, giving Anna a stern smile.
Anna chuckled slightly at her own stupidity, and most of everything she had been going through the past few months seemed so idiotic now.
One day, Voldemort was going to come back. That was just a fact.
Ginny squeezed Anna’s hand reassuringly.
But all she knew right now was that she couldn’t focus on the negatives and waste her life away. A short life among friends - filled with laughter and happiness and joy; it was enough.
“Oi! I found the idiots!”
The girls turned around to see Harry and Ron running towards them - Draco, Cedric, and Hermione following closely behind.
Anna’s blush deepened as they came near - knowing full-well that if they had all come to search for her, they probably knew what had happened with the starglass granules.
“What in the bloody hell are you doing out of bed?” Harry immediately spat out when he reached earshot, though the obvious worry shining in his emerald eyes gave him away.
Cedric’s eyes mirrored her brother’s - scanning her for obvious injury. “You’re not hurt, are you?”
She shook her head, smiling brightly. “I’m okay now, Ced. Promise.” Anna jerked her finger back at the castle. “For now, let’s all just go back home.”
YOU ARE READING
Lillian 'Anna' Potter || Goblet of Fire
Fanfiction"YOU'VE PLAYED ME FOR A FOOL AND STRUNG ME ALONG LIKE A FIDDLE. THE LEAST I DESERVE FROM YOU IS AN EXPLANATION!" It was revealed by J.K Rowling that when Lily Potter originally died, she was with child. What if Lily had her second child before Volde...
