Lillian 'Anna' Potter || Goblet of Fire

Chapter Thirty-Two: Deceitful Hearts

"No. No, no, no, no - no. No!" Anna hissed at herself as she paced inside the Gryffindor common room at 4am in the morning - too worked up with herself to sleep, despite not sleeping the night before.

Draco was her best friend(only because Ginny was her sister, as Ginny had made that distinction crystal clear during a jealous rant) and one of the people she trusted most in her life. Of course, it was only natural to like him - even her pet panther had a crush on the Malfoy heir!

Besides, she was in a relationship with Cedric, and while they had been in a rough place right at the moment - Cedric in the tournament, Anna clearly supporting her brother more than him and not a lot of time to spend together between school and other things - she couldn't just ditch him for Draco; it would be cruel and unfair.

But she still couldn't get the image of Draco as that person - the one who stood and worked by your side in life, both people in that kind of relationship of loving each other equally and fully.

Anna wouldn't have called herself a romantic, but didn't every girl eventually dream of the perfect soulmate? But she had to get back down to earth. She was with Cedric, and even if she could have what she may have wanted with Draco, he didn't like her in that way. Couldn't.

They had talked about it once before. He had always been doing things a little too extra when it came to her, and Anna was curious. Draco admitted he admired her, but like Anna, Draco also was trapped by the terms of being a Malfoy.

They were purebloods for one thing - had been since the beginning of time. As sole heir, it was Draco's job to marry another pureblood, and while Anna's parents were both a witch and wizard, her mother was still muggle-born, making Anna a half-blood; illegible.

Of course, they had quickly moved on, and never touched the subject again - the awkwardness a bit too much to bear. After all, two 14 year old kids having a bit of a crush on one another talking about marriage? It was ridiculous.

But neither denied nor confirmed their affections for one another.

Besides, Anna knew Draco and his personality. It was all or nothing with him, and if he couldn't see something in his present being useful in his future, he let it go, and moved on.

She couldn't be that girl for him. Her future was uncertain as it was - especially with the things Tom Riddle had told her in the Chamber of Secrets in her first year at Hogwarts. And as she had already come to terms with, Voldemort was going to come back. Anna just didn't know whether it would be in 10 years or 50 - and Draco's happiness wasn't something she could risk. It would be selfish, and she already had Cedric at her side. It wasn't fair to want more.

"Momma?" She turned around to see Boudica - tiredly blinking at Anna lazily as she came forward. "Why aren't you sleeping?"

"Just thinking." Anna responded, giving the panther a small smile. "You should go back to bed - I know how grumpy you get when you're tired."

As usual, Boudica only ignored her - wrapping her furry form around Anna's legs, resting her chin at the top of Anna's foot. "You're thinking about Silver-Eyes again, aren't you?" She asked quietly. Boudica met Anna's gaze. "Your pulse always speeds up when you do."

Carefully, Anna sat down on the cool wooden floor as Boudica moved to curl up by her side. "I just...want to be honest with myself." She eventually said. "I want to make sure that I'm not being unfair to Cedric, because he doesn't deserve to be half-loved."

"You know, I heard the scary lady say once that there's a reason we don't just have hearts, but brains." Boudica said, referring to Professor McGonagall. "I like Silver-Eyes too, but you obviously also care for That Boy a lot also. But unlike Silver-Eyes, you and That Boy are in a relationship, which needs a lot of work. So if you're willing to work hard to love each other, to be his support and vice-versa, then...then I think that's more than fair."

Anna kept staring at Boudica with wide eyes. She was only nearly a year old, yet in some ways, her cat was wiser than some adults she knew in her life. To think that if she hadn't heard Boudica that fateful day at the World Cup, the two of them wouldn't be here today.

"You're right, Boudica." She said eventually. "It doesn't matter if I may or may not like Draco Malfoy, because as long as I choose Cedric, it's fair to him and everyone else."

So when she met up with Cedric to walk to breakfast with him the next morning, she gave a blinding smile, and confidently put her hand in his. Hearts were deceitful things, and their ideas could change in the blink of an eye, but when she chose to be with Cedric, she made both a choice and a promise.

As long as she was willing to work hard at their relationship and kept those other emotions from judging her actions, and vice versa, it didn't matter about any other feelings her heart may harbor for someone else. It would be just fine.