saccharine |edward cullen

11| gone beyond

11| gone beyond

She didn't think of it. Or at least she tried not to. It was hard to ignore his presence or lack of communication between the two. Even on the days they hadn't spoke before, they'd at least meet eyes for a split second. Not now, it seemed they were trying their best to avoid each other despite the difficulty of it in the only class they shared. If it wasn't for that said class, they wouldn't be stuck together again for a good portion of the school day at some greenhouse.

"No don't eat that!" Lux stumbled toward the side, their teacher pushing through to find Tyler two seconds away at gulping down the compost tea. She froze, hands stuck out against the scrap wood table with potted plants. There was a tight grip on her shoulder, stopping her from slipping into the table due to the puddles on the floor. The arm released Lux quickly, her eyes shifting up to find Edward.

"Thanks," she muttered wiping her hands off of any wood dust on her jeans. He nodded staring up ahead at the group that already gone ahead of them. She did the same, continuing a slow pace behind, Edward trailing just behind her.

"Be careful," he said quietly, matching her stride not moving past her. She sighed, "So are you speaking to me again?" It was silent, she couldn't see the way he fought the urge to smile at the thought. She'd been equally aware of their lack of communication weighing heavily around her as he was. "No, not really," he said wondering what she'd respond with.

"Then what do you want, Edward?" Lux crossed her arms over her chest letting out a huff in annoyance, "Are you going to try and convince me you didn't just help me out right now, too?"

"I'm sorry," she found his tone sincere, looking back to see if his expression matched, "I'm being very rude, I know. But it's better this way."

"What?" She tried looking ahead to not seen affected by his words which in fact left her feeling confused. Edward stilled, "It's better if we're not friends."

"You should've figured that out sooner and saved yourself all this regret," her words were cold. Edward can feel the harshness radiating off her tone sending him into a moment of intimidation and hurt. "You should've just let the stupid van crush me."

"Let's get to the busses come on!" Mr. Molina shouted. Lux had been blinded by their conversation she failed to notice in which direction they'd gone to. Standing between their busses. Edward couldn't contain the scoff as he took a step closer with no mind, "You think I regret saving you."

"I know you do," she wouldn't back down. He was beginning to see more clearly that Lux was a stubborn girl. And she had a right to feel confused. After what happened the other day, and Edward's impulsive decision to stop the van he couldn't blame her. He was feeling guilty for gaslighting her. By trying to make her believe what she saw wasn't the truth, and in turn avoiding her for her questions and concerns.

But at the same time he was feeling annoyed. Not with her in any way, he wasn't sure he could actually get mad at her for something was that was her fault or not. He was mad at himself for being an idiot. For getting too caught up on someone, and causing all this trouble for everyone. For not being able to answer her questions with the truth, having to have something hidden from her—more than he already had. And finally being mad that he was impacted so much by her mere presence and there wasn't a single thing he could do about it but let his tone drop in a cold tone as he spoke, "You don't know anything." 

"Lux!" The two stared each other down, Mike's voice piercing through their flares. She turned around, Mike waiting for her by the door. He wrapped his arm around her as she joined him, Edward catching the guy's words, "Are you okay?"

As much as he wanted to hear what she'd say, he told himself not to. Disappearing into his bus with Alice and Jasper finally catching up to them.

"So Jessica asked me to the spring dance," Mike pointed out once sat together. Bella was being sucked into Eric's deep interest in Comic Con which only left Mike and Lux to speak. In reality she wasn't even in the mood to speak. She was feeling bitter from her conversation with Edward and was in no means interest in small talk on the bus ride home.

"Really? That's great you'll have loads of fun," honestly she'd forgotten all about the supposed dance. It was two weeks again and she'd barely even thought about it. It was some girls ask guys kind of formal that Jessica was always buzzing about. In the beginning she contemplated going or not. She figured it'd be nice to be out of the house for a change but then she thought about having to either have a date or go alone and sulk in a corner.

In the end, the choice to not go was looking more tempting than the latter and she created an excuse of visiting Seattle for a day trip. It was clear she hoped he'd ask her, it wouldn't have been without his confession of it. The ride back was awkward after that, he tried not to seem affected by it but it was clear he was by the lack of enthusiasm and sluggish form.

"So will you come to the beach?" Bella asked as the two left to their parked cars, "It'd be nice to have someone more to talk to other than Angela. I feel like I annoy her sometimes, I don't know."

"Can I tell you tonight? Let me think about it a little more and then I'll get back to you. I don't even know if I have coats thick enough for sea breeze," Lux answered honestly.

She did think about it later that night, using it to distract herself from other things. She used it to not think about Edward's cruel words and behavior. It wasn't a bad idea but she also wasn't 100% on board either.

::.