Only You

Chapter 24- Dakota

Trigger warning- skipping meals/borderline eating disorder discussed

"I didn't know what you wanted..." I hear Rain say nervously & I turn to him. "I went to one of my favorite soup places in this area, & got us chicken noodle & broccoli cheddar. Whichever one you want... I just thought a hot meal would be nice & relaxing..."

I smile warmly, taking the chicken noodle. "Thank you. You really didn't have to bring lunch. I was just going to eat some of the granola bars I left in my car, honestly..."

He shakes his head at me, frowning slightly. "You really ought to eat lunch, love. It's not healthy to skip meals."

"I know..." I groan. "I just... am not really hungry around lunch time ever... & sometimes it's hard to motivate myself to eat..."

He rubs my shoulder soothingly with one arm. "I know... But you've been working so hard today, & you really should eat something..." He looks at me encouragingly, saying in a sing-songy tone,"The spices of the soup help with appetite..."

"Ok..." I sigh, though smiling slightly, & dig into my soup. He's right. It's warm & relaxing, the broth's familiar flavor soothing & filling my stomach. I lean into him slightly, head on his shoulder, leaning into his right arm. He smiles, head leaning against mine as we eat. I tilt my head minutely to look up at him. "Can I try some of yours?"

He chuckles. "Sure." He fills his spoon, slowly guiding it to my mouth, blowing on it first & I smile.

"I'm not a child, you know."

"I know... Just let me treat you for once."

"You always treat me."

"Do you not like that?" His brows furrow & he frowns slightly, spoon stopping before my mouth. I eat it, wobbling my head side to side noncommittally in response.

"Mmm... There's nothing wrong with it... Just maybe let me treat you every once in a while... & don't do it all the time..."

He nods, smiling & kissing the top of my hair. "Sure, love. I'm ok with that. Just understand that... I like to treat you... I'm not doing it because I have to, but because I want to... This is how I express my love for you..."

I smile. "As long as I know you aren't trying to protect me all the time."

He nods. "Yeah... I'm not... I mean, I do care for you, & I want you to be safe... & if you were ever in legitimate danger, I would protect you, of course... But your daily decisions are yours... I don't control you, nor do I ever intend to."

I grin crookedly. "Now that that serious discussion is over, give me some cuddles!" He chuckles, obeying happily. "& you thought I would be the one controlling you..." He laughs lightheartedly. "As you wish, my liege." He mock bowed & I chortled. What a goofball.

As you can tell, Dakota's love language is kinda physical contact, & Rain's is doing things for someone. I feel they are getting better @ communicating, & are talking about more deep issues as the book goes on...

I know this chapter isn't as wholesome as some chapters, but necessary, for sure. They gotta deepen their relationship, ya know?

I have experience with this kinda thing too... A kinda eating disorder... I was really depressed all 8th grade year... I felt like nobody ever cared about me... I started skipping meals just to see if anyone would care &... If you've ever done that, you know it's a habit that can become addictive... It's hard to define an eating disorder sometimes, but I know what I went through definitely wasn't normal... I realize that now... I didn't at the time... I convinced myself that I was just "increasing my appetite" for when I did eat, making my meals more "appealing". I started to become addicted... To hunger pains & skipping meals, I guess... I continued to do it... Longer than anyone should...

I bring this up with Dakota, & my book, bc I feel that it's important to address things like this. Issues like this. Not everyone talks about them, & I feel that talking about their personal issues deepens Dakota & Rain's relationship.

Sorry if you see this as an unnecessary plot point (I plan to have it reoccur throughout the book, not just appear once & never again, bc it is an important issue, if that's ok), or if I don't handle it very well in my writing. I hope that by including these type of issues I can bring light to some things that people are going through.

Thankfully, since 8th grade, I haven't had a full relapse, though sometimes I might get into a dark place & not eat for a few days. I often find I slip into this habit when I'm especially depressed or feel like I don't matter.

I hope that by talking about these things I can help others out there like me, & help everyone else understand a little more.

Sorry if this note was long, & if I am not able to represent this issue perfectly, as I am not a very good writer.

Y'all are amazing & loved. Bye <3