His blurred eyes

Dumb

I got out and we departed. She, going to her car, not without her offer to drive me home though. I, as usual, take the bus. Having my earphones in, looking at the building lights and people leaving the bus one by one.

A black Mercedes car silently driving behind us.

It was my halt and I got out. The driver looking at me strangely. He's not the first one though. After a little of walking I reach the house. And at the same time the pitch-black car arrives. I wave at him. George is his name.

I enter and throw my bag on the ground. Softly massaging my right shoulder, it is hurting again.

"Welcome home, miss Nova."

I look at her. One of the workers in the house, but also my favorite one.

"Is he home?" I ask.

"No, miss."

I push her playfully as she starts laughing herself.

"You little asshole!"

She couldn't stop laughing, Nola enjoyed seeing my uncomfortable look while asking that question.

"As a punishment you'll have to bring that bag to my drawing room. And make some tea. Oh, and that little cake Katy made."

"I can't believe you're making me do this."
She rolls her eyes.

"Back talk? You shouldn't dare speak to your master like that!" I let out with a heavy British accent. Making it very suitable.

"See you there, stupid." The woman says while stepping to the kitchen.

I stretch my arms before picking one of the two staircases and walk up to my personalised drawing room. The whole room was filled with paper pinned on the walls. Like every time I enter, I examine each and every one of them. Seeing if one stands out or doesn't fit anymore.

If that's the case, I would pull it out and put it in one of the many drawers that were most likely already filled. However, there is one pinboard I always avoid. In the far corner so it can't reach my eyes.

Not ready to face it.

At that moment Nola comes in, struggling with all the things she is carrying. I immediately reach out for my bag and pull the drawing from earlier, finishing it as my friend watches.

Like a weight lifts off my hurting shoulder, I pull back. Staring at the finished product intensely. Memorising the black and white rusty vintage mansion in my brain.

I pick it up and give it to Nola, without looking at her.

"Put it on the board."

The girl is used to this and knows exactly what I mean. Her steps fill the silence in the room but stop for a second, pinning the drawing. "It's done." Nola reassures, standing next to me.

She sits next to me and we both enjoy our tea and cake. Being happy we're done with work. And we sat there for hours.

My phone rings. A notification popping up on the home screen.

'You're invited to my party on Friday night. I expect you to be there at 11 pm. The address is. Street Hallaway 32. Please be dressed in black.'

Looks like Lisa is legit about inviting me. Should I even go?

"Are you going?"

I sigh. I don't want to...I know that I would be much better at home eating chips while watching Netflix.

"I think you should...It'll help you ease your mind."

Nola shares her opinion.

"I don't even know anyone there..."

She shrugs.

"Well then it's a great opportunity to meet new people..."

I roll my eyes and stand up. Picking up my bag in the process. She's always so optimistic...

"I'll think about it. Tell the others I'm going out. And tell George not to follow me."

Without waiting for her words, I skip down the stairs.

Opening the door and going out. Walking until I reach my place. A little park...

It was far empty by now. I doubt anyone would bring their child here at midnight.

I fumble in my bag until I found what I was looking for. My pack of cigarettes.

You might be wondering...am I stupid? Am I so dumb to smoke even though I have asthma?

Yes, I am a dumb bitch. I started this and now I can't stop.

I don't care...What is it going to do anyway? Kill me? Who cares?

I live with a hole in me all the time. If this ends my suffering, then I am grateful. I mean I should be, right?

The smoke leaves my mouth. I block all the memories that come with this place.

It's just a park...yes...that's it.

You're lying..

I hear a noise coming from behind a few bushes and trees. I look up. Instinctively hiding my cigarette.

The person's face is visible as the dull lights shine on him.

"Nova?"