Adopted By The Wrong Number: Part 4: Chris Evans Fanfic

Chapter 21- No Kids

I was just chilling in my room, I had just finished all my classes. And my dad peaked into my room.

"Wanna go to the store with me?"

"Can I get snacks if I go?"

"Yes."

"Then yes, I wanna go."

"You have 5 minutes."

He left. I honestly just put jean shorts on, and a big hoodie, which I think is my dad's. I brushed out my hair. I put shoes on, got my mask.

"Its cold and you're gonna wear shorts?"

"Yes."

"You're gonna get cold."

"Its fine."

"Don't say I didn't warn you."

We got into the car, and drove. We parked, and got in. Toward the end, I went to a different isle because I wanted to get chips.

So I told my dad, and I went. Meanwhile I was looking over my chip options, a fucking kid I didn't fucking see, bit me. Bit my fucking leg, and was able to draw blood. WHO THE FUCK BITES SOMEONE IN THE STORE IN THE MIDDLE OF A FUCKING PANDEMIC?!?!?

The kid had blood on his teeth, and then an idea popped into my head. My eyes widened, and I started shouting a bit. "Fuck! Fuck! Shit. Shit shit." My father came  to me, saw the scene, and looked very curious, and just stood there.

Then a very angry lady came toward me, and basically started lecturing me.

"How dare you speak to my child like that? That is rude, why would you ever curse in front of a 4 year old. Does this generation not give a shit about the younger generation, god gen z just thinks they can do anything, don't they?"

So a stupid millennial, the is a Karen, who hates on gen z, what the fuck. Anyway time for the show, I could see that my dad wanted to say something but I told him not to.

I wanted to let this play out. And then I started talking, interrupting her.

"Ma'am you need to get your son tested immediately, he got my blood on him, and I'm positive" I paused for a bit, gotta add dramatic affect. "I'm positive for Hiv." Then the women stopped dead in her tracks.

Dead silent, the little boy grew worried, seeing that his mother wasn't defending him anymore, and he started crying. I wanted to laugh, so badly.

I grabbed my chips, and walked away with my father. As we were walking I heard the women sobbing.

My father hasn't said a word to me, so we payed and then got out. When we got outta the store, he started talking.

"What the fuck-"

"Kids needs to learn some how."

"Is your leg okay?"

"Blood dried so I'm chilling, I am gonna put hand sanitizer on it when we get into the car because God knows what that fudging kid has put his mouth on."

We got the car and started putting the stuff into the trunk, a fan came up to my dad, just waved at me, I waved back and got into the car.

When he entered the car, he was still thinking about the events of the store.

"You basically told a kid, he might die."

"That 4 year old doesn't even know what hiv is, it's fine."

"You told his mother he was gonna die."

"I say it was well deserved, as he did bite me and got blood outta me."

"Honestly when I heard you, I got scared, but then I saw your leg and the kid, and I'm like what the fuck is she gonna do, also the women was pissing me off, so your actions were very good."

"I love kids I do, but like if the kid bites me I'm either gonna kick them or tell them their gonna die, and just scare them. I rather do that, then get charged for hitting a kid."

"You went with the better option." Meanwhile he was saying that, I grabbed the hand sanitizer, and a napkin we had in the car, and I just wiped some, it fucking hurt but it's fine.

When we got home, I helped put all the things away and cleaned the bite properly, and put one of those big bandages on.

Then I immediately texted Paddy.

Hope:
We're not having kids, we can just adopt them at like the age of 5, that way they know how to speak and potty train

PADDDDDYYY:
There has to be a backstory to that

I told him the story, and he sent a voice memo of him laughing his ass off.

Then I heard my dad call me, so I went out to the kitchen and saw Uncle Scott.

"Hey Uncle Superior."

"Hello, what happened to your leg?"

"Some stupid kid, it's fine, I told his mother he might die."

"Oh do tell."

I told him the story and at the end of it he said.

"Is it bad, that I'm a bit proud, let me correct myself, that I'm alot proud."

"No, I'm proud to."

Rest of that day went with me and uncle Scott basically roasting my father. Also my dad gave us the run through of how he was gonna start shooting gray man. And how he was gonna start shooting in Los Angeles.

Which meant, I was gonna be staying with my grandmother, with Dodger. He said these exact words, "I would take you, but with everything going on, and I don't want you to have to stay in a hotel for the whole day."

I honestly didn't care much, just that he would be in LA for a while, but it's fine.

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A/n: got this idea off of tiktok ngl, I just thought it would be funny, if you took a offense to this chapter, than uhm- idk 😐