Closet rats

17 Eliot

Ben and i have been having a thing for a solid month now and i think things are looking good. I mean, i could never actually be his boyfriend in public but what we have now is working well i think. We have spent many a nights at my place together and there has been a bit of the frickle frackle. I know childish but i dont know what else to say. Although in saying that, things have been getting a little weird. I dont know why, but Ben has been a bit awkward about certain things that come up in conversation, but i dont know, maybe its always been like that. Anyway im off to school now.

That was horrible! I cant believe what just happened today! Why? Why did i do that. I should probably start from the beginning for you.
So i was walking to school with Jack and standing outside the gate to school i saw Ben. But he wasnt alone. There was another boy with him. He was tall and relatively good looking, not a lot of muscle but he had really soft yet deep brown eyes that were totally mentally undressing Ben! We were about 20 meters away before i could really see the other boy properly, but i could tell it was Ben from miles away. The other boy had his arm leaning against a pole over Bens head, and he was looking down at him. The body language of the other boy was telling me there was some serious flirting going on and Bens body language was bloody well enjoying it! As we walked closer and Jack finally realized what was going on, he was laughing his huge head off. He was pissing himself and i was right next to him turning red as a tomato with anger. I swear there could have been steam coming out of my ears.
We approached them and Jack started his usual thing.
"Oh my goodness me!! Its two bloody girly boys! Two little gay boys!? Dont get to close Eliot" Jack warned as he hit my chest with the back of his hands softly "It might be fuckin contagious! Hahaha! I dont want to catch the homo!" And he carried on laughing. Thats when i actually said something. But not in the way you were expecting.
"Shit i dont wanna catch fag" I said with a straight face looking directly into Bens eyes
"What the fuck!" Ben said as he screwed up his face.
"You heard me. Maybe youre def to words just like you seem to be with feelings." And i started to walk off pushing past Ben. He turned around and put his hand on my shoulder. 
"Hey! Its not my fault im scared to be who i am!"
"Dont touch me" I said swiping his hand away
"Why not? Because you dont want to catch gay? Because you actually believe its something you can catch!? Like a desies?"
"Well in a world like this i would doubt it to be a god damn choice!"
"Knock him dead El!" Jack called out.
"Yeah come on Eliot. Knock. Me. Dead. Or else i might just accidental carry on my life with him!" He said pointing to the other boy standing behind him.
"Dont think i wont just because of your lies!"
"They werent lies! But this is your fault! Because you are too afraid. Maybe if you werent such a baby about everything!"
"Shut up!"
"Its because of your Dad isnt it? Because he threw you out because of it! Thats why you are so god damn afraid"
"Dont say anything about my dad! You know nothing you shit little homo!!" I grabbed his hand spun him around into an arm lock and pushed him flying towards the pavement. He groaned in pain and moved over onto his back and i could see the damage i had caused. There was blood pouring from his nose like a waterfall and it was sightly crooked. I knew that i would have broken his nose if i pulled the move off because the first thing that would hit the ground if he had no arms would be his face, but i didnt really mean to hurt him like that.

Hello Guys! Im really sorry i havent been posting much at all, but i have a lot of shit going on at school and i havent had any down time. Ill post as much as i can, but at the moment things are a bit too serious and im just not feeling all that great sorry. Please vote and comment. <3