Closet rats

2 Eliot

Its really hard being me these days. I mean, not really me... I cant be me. I cant be the true me, really, because im different. Im not like everyone else. And i know how people like me get treated. Im popular. Very popular, mostly because my brother is captain of the rugby team, and in schools like this, rugby is really everything. And if people knew who i was i would be thrown out to the dogs. The dogs being the people i call friends right now. I wish the i didnt call them friends because they arent my friends. Friends are people who you trust, who you can talk to all the time. But i dont have any friends. Oh well i do have a friend. Clair is my friend. Well to everyone else she is my girl friend, but... Im not really the girlfriend type. Im the boyfriend type. I know i know. I know what your thinking, if im gay i shouldnt have a girlfriend and i should break up with her. But she knows, Clair knows and she is keeping my secret. We hang out all the time, and saying that she is my girlfriend is keeping suspicion away from me. So people arent going to be asking me all about why i dont have a girlfriend, and so my secret wont be thrown out into the world, so i wont be destroyed!
That was very dramatic.

Just a few months ago this boy, Ben, came out. He is my age and is getting beat up heaps. Its kinda calmed down a lot since he first came out, but he is still getting pushed around. He is actually really quite cute though. He has light brown shaggy hair not long, but sort of everywhere.  He has a great sense of fashion! I suppose thats a bit of a gay stereo type, but i guess it is often true. He is actually quite muscly when he isnt wearing a shirt but he is very nerdy and he wears the cutest glasses ever. 

The other day i was walking with Jack and a few of the other guys, and we walk pest Ben. As we walked past Jack pushed Ben to the ground and dented his guitar. I stopped because i could see how upset he looked. It was a nice guitar, i wish i could play.
"Hey" I said taking his hand "Im so sorry about that!"
"Oh thats okay" He smiled " Thats just the school food chain really isnt it? Im the gay guy, im different to everyone, im weird.. Im diseased or something." 
Wow he is so straight forward. I hope he doesnt actually think that of himself...
"I dont think youre diseased" I picked up the guitar "Do you play?"
"Yeah I do" His eyes flickered with light when i asked "And i write my own songs. Thats sounds so nerdy haha"
His laugh a=was cute and nervous
"Thats not nerdy its cool! I wish i could play."
"Well i could teach you!" He said straight after me. I would love that, he is so cute, id like some quality time with him. Wait what?
"That would be cool, in between serving 'King Jack' maybe we could"
"Oh my gosh. Yes we should some time... hehehe."
"Well, i better go. It was cool talking to you"
"Yeah, you too. See you around. Thanks so much"
And i left him standing there. Seriously though when i see people beating him up, i just want to run over and hug him! ugh!