in the hands of my abuser

do you remember?

"Where shall we start, Tommy" a cheery attitude tainted Wilburs monotone voice, almost as if he was smiling.

"Um. Who.. who is Tubbo?"

"Tubbo? he was your best friend"

"Was?" Tommy's voice cracked as he repeated the words that easily fell out of Wilburs mouth. how was it so easy to except that this 'Tubbo' was gone.

"Well you're dead, Tommy. I'm not sure if he could be friends with a dead person"

"Stop. don't say that, Wilbur— please"

"Fine fine. Do you want to know more or not?Wilbur said through a sigh, awaiting an answer.

"Yeah, tell me about my.. best friend" Tommy asked before shakily inhaling.

"Tubbo was your right hand man. He was there with you through thick and thin. He was quite literally the most loyal person i have ever come across, despite being taken for granted.. by you, Tommy"

"By me? What? I would never take someone like that for granted" he scoffed.

"Sure, Tommy, sure. Moving on" Wilbur paused and let out a breathy chuckle before continuing. "You guys stuck together no matter what, even when everyone had their doubts. You guys fought side by side through wars, battles, arguments and more. it was like a dream friendship to most, everyone admired it. you guys had a lot of fun, there's a lot of memories attached to your adventure, Tommy. I'm surprised you don't remember him"

Tommy inhaled slowly. "no i remember him, prick. i'm not that dumb. brunette lad with a typical green button up, right?"

Wilbur hummed in response, agreeing.

"Right, okay. Where is he now? Does he miss me— no of course he misses me? who wouldn't?" Tommy scoffed playfully, letting out a chuckle that soon developed into a fit of laughter.

Wilbur cleared his throat, dismissing his uncontrollable laughter.

"How did you forget, Tommy?"

Tommy's cackles slowly subsided, leaving his side of the conversation to be left blank.

"I'm not sure? I should remember people like that, right? maybe somethings wrong with me.. am i going crazy? is this a side effect of death? shouldnt memories be carried with me to the grave?"

Tommy was a rambling mess, stumbling over his own words and cutting his thoughts off mid sentence.

"A much as i want to agree— youre not crazy, Tommy. i forgot a few things too when i was a new member to this abyss that reeks with death" Wilbur explained. "Just let me know if there's anything i need to remind you of"

Tommy hummed in agreement, trying to gather his quickly moving thoughts.

—-

2 months. It's been awhile. Tommy has been slowly gaining his memory back with the help of Wilbur even though he wouldn't have minded forgetting a good amount of them.

These months have been painful, considering it what it was filled with. Death is odd, it doesn't have a certain feeling or emotion to bring but it certainly isn't positive, right?

Death is strange, it's filled with wonder, mystery, questions. Have you ever wondered what it's like to die? where you would go? have you ever thought about what it's like or how it feels? maybe you've described death as pleasant or scary, maybe you've painted it to be destiny or fate. everyone dies, no matter the cause, the age, the time— it happens, it's inescapable. There's no way to dodge death, yet we still don't seem to mind it, we move on with our lives. we feed the countdown.

we spend our days watching the clock, tracking hours, minutes, seconds. It's all as if we're awaiting our death? like we're unintentionally forcing the clock. Scary, right?

Maybe Tommy's destiny finally caught up to his fast pace. Maybe it was finally time. We can't be mad though. we all know, death is inevitable. maybe after days and years of dodging death, Tommy could no longer fight. To be fair, he didn't really have a choice. His way of passing granted him no escape, it was fate. Fate is good though, right? At least you would think so.

This didn't seem good. Fate didn't seem good, this couldn't be the end, this couldn't be Tommy's destiny. He was stuck with this traitor, in this so-called abyss, losing every drop of sanity. This wasn't it, he wouldn't let this be the outcome.

Tommy's point was proven when he fell into a unconsciousness or 'deep sleep'. His eyes fluttered open to reveal a lava wall dripping down, cold black floor pushing against his skin and a certain person with a certain smile, they looked relieved.

"Tommy! How was it?"