The Devil ⥋ Eren Jaeger

Author's Note, Please Read

I don't like making author's notes, especially since I just made one but this needs to be said. Stop Asian Hate and Protect Asian Lives.

TW: Racism, hate-crimes, fetishization

I've been taking another short break from Wattpad to focus on myself. As an Asian-American this week has been very hard for me. As most may know, on March 16, 2021, a gunman opened fire in three Asian-owned spas in Atlanta, Georgia. He killed eight people including six Asian women.

For the past year Asian hate crimes all over the world have increased dramatically due to the Coronavirus. The media and government used China as a scapegoat and therefore caused this increase. I admit, in late 2019 and early 2020 I thought that the coronavirus wasn't a big deal, so I allowed the Chinese Coronavirus "jokes" to continue. I truly wish that I hadn't.

As the virus claimed more victims, I realized that being the butt of these insensitive "jokes" angered me especially when Trump started to call it the, "China Virus" and the "Kung Flu". They were never funny and will never be funny. I remember going out the weekend before March 13, 2020. Before everything was shut down in the United States. While out, I started to feel something that I don't feel quite often. Fear. Fear that someone might spit on me or yell at me for bringing a virus from a country I have never been to. I clung to my sister and tried to hide in the corners of the store, hoping that no one would see me.

In July of 2020 and 89 year-old grandmother was set on fire in Brooklyn. She did nothing to provoke an attack. I was angered and tried my best to raise awareness about her through my social media but it never gained the traction it should have. I began to gaslight myself into thinking that maybe I was overreacting. That Asian hate-crimes weren't a big deal and that everything would go back to normal. After all, I never experienced any racist interactions involving the coronavirus (although it could be because I never go out).

But Anti-Asian racism didn't begin with the pandemic. In the US it started the moment the first Asian person set a foot in the country hundreds of years ago. When I was younger I went to a Chinese Catholic school. Even though both of my parents are atheists, I believe that they sent me there because its student population was predominantly Chinese. They did not want me to experience the racism they saw as immigrants. Even at that school I was taught "Asian stereotypes" from my own Asian friends and even believed them. We were all victims of white supremacy and internalized racism.

As I left my predominantly Chinese school and went to a diverse public school, I began to face racism from everyone. I remember telling a white boy in fifth grade that I was Vietnamese. He said, "Your people killed my grandfather!" I didn't really know what to say to that. I remember another boy asking me if I was looking at the sun because I always looked like I was squinting and of course, the usual dog eating jokes. I didn't start to consider myself to be American until I was thirteen. I always considered white people to be American and the "Asian-ness" in me prevented me from being one despite being born and raised here. I didn't stop wanting to be white until July of 2020.

I love everything about my culture, while I always felt pride in being who I am, I always wanted to be someone else. When K-pop and anime were gaining traction in the West I began to feel proud that I could see someone who looks like me on tv. I genuinely thought that maybe fetishization was a compliment because we were never seen as desirable before.

But fetishization reduces us to sexual objects instead of who we really are: actual people who feel and act just like everyone else. The fetishization of Yi in this fanfic is a common theme. She is always kidnapped because of her "rare" and "exotic" features. The reason why Mikasa's parents were killed and she was kidnapped was due to fetishization. The kidnappers mentioned selling her in the Underground which would make them a lot of money because she was Eastern.

The gunman in Atlanta definitely had a sexual fetish for Asian women. To fetishize an entire race is in fact, racist. He saw them as a "temptation" that he needed to get rid of. And so he drove thirty miles to three Asian-owned spas. Yes, the police have said that it was not racially motivated but would you really trust a white man who wore a t-shirt saying the coronavirus was imported from "Chy-na"? Just say it as it is. The shooting of 3 spas in Atlanta was a hate crime.

As enjoyers of anime I encourage you to speak up on Anti-Asian hate. It is just the bare minimum. You can't enjoy our culture and not care about our people. The amount of people with an anime pfp telling us that we're overreacting and that the attack wasn't racist is appalling. You enjoy Asian culture. Love our people like you love our culture. While China is the scapegoat, it affects all Asians who look "Chinese" (this would be "small eyes" and black hair including but not limited to East and Southeast Asians). Please stand with us. The majority of victims of the hate crimes are women and our elderly. I am scared for my grandparents to go outside. I don't want them to be another Instagram post that gets ignored.

Say their names
Soon Chung Park, 74
Hyun Jung Kim, 51
Suncha Kim, 69
Yong Ae Yue, 63
Xiaojie Tan, 49
Daoyou Feng, 44
Delaina Ashley Yaun, 33
Paul Andre Michels, 55

Thank you for reading this. Updates will be back to its regular schedule with updates every Wednesday. Please also remember that Asia is not just China, Japan, and Korea but a diverse continent including 40+ countries.

- Kayla